How Should the Mentally Retarded be Treated?

Great Debates
41

You’re right–it’s not different. You refer to a person with mental retardation or developmental disabilities as a person, boy, girl, woman, man, child FIRST then when NECESSARY by their characteristic. It’s insulting to refer to people who are mentally retarded as if they are nothing more than their limitation.

I know this reeks of the dreaded “political correctness” but what is being expressed is true stereotyping.

A quick test–substitute the word Jew or Black in statments about someone with mental handicaps.

Quote: I guess I just feel very uncomfortable and awkward around MR. I hate feeling that way, but perhaps I’m just not used to them. (I’m not saying the speaker is mean or evil here–just hasn’t thought this through)

Try this: I guess I just feel very uncomfortable and awkward around Jews. I hate feeling that way, but perhaps I’m just not used to them.

Quote: How should the mentally retarded be treated? Do you treat them as humans with limitations? Or as limited humans?

Try this: How should the Blacks be treated? Do you treat them as humans with limitations? Or as limited humans?

Do you see how this is stereotyping? It sure sounds a LOT like the stuff I heard in the Deep South during the desegregation era and still hear from bigots.

People with mental retardation are MORE than some label that actually is not well defined. For example, there are plenty of people with down syndrome who have IQs that can be in the low-normal range–and as more education and specialized training is provided the average IQ of people with down syndrome continues to rise. Somehow, though, a person with down syndrome and an IQ of 80 will never be accepted like the person of low-normal IQ of 80. What makes the difference–not abilities but perceptions. Boy does the initial poster make that perfectly clear.

If you want to read something totally fascinating on this check out:

http://www.vichealth.vic.gov.au/~borth/Majority.htm

Mental Retardation, Dementia, and the Age of Majority
By Chris Borthwick
Reprinted with thanks from Disability & Society, Vol. 9, No. 4, 1994

A reality that corresponds to ‘Mental Retardation’ is taken for granted; indeed, mental retardation may almost be
defined as that area of deviancy that is taken for granted. Historically, socially, and geographically ‘Mental Retardation’ is what is left over when

rogues, vagabonds, the idle, beggars, fortune tellers, diviners, musicians, runaways, drunkards, prostitutes, pilferers, brawlers, (Wolfensberger, 1975, p. 65)

have been taken out of asylums (all these groups have at one time or another shared the asylums with people with intellectual impairment) and sexual deviants, deaf people, people with mental illness, paupers, people with cerebral palsy, habitual drunkards, consumptives, unmarried mothers on welfare, epileptics, habitual criminals, drug addicts and people engaged in the white slave trade (all these groups have been targeted by eugenicists) have been removed from the sanctions imposed on the feebleminded (Kevles, 1985). As we have successively become conscious of each group its placement within ‘Mental Retardation’ has appeared anomalous and it has been removed. What remains after each successive extraction is specifically the unexamined, the group that does not arouse questions, the group that seems a ‘fact of nature’ and is not seen as the outcome of a social process. The ‘fact of nature’ serves as an explanation of subordination and a justification for differential
treatment.

One of the considerations associated with the distinction between the neurological model and the psychological model of disability is the presence or absence of rights; it is not necessarily a coincidence that the boundaries of ‘Dementia’ coincide with the age of majority.
[note: Psychiatric definition of dementia and mental retardation are similar–the difference is age of onset of symptoms] It is time to concede to these people the right to be freed from a classification that stigmatizes them, denies their specific impairments, and conceals their individual potential. The term ‘Mental Retardation’ should in future be used only as part of the phrase ‘diagnosed as mentally retarded’, a reference to a social condition rather than a characteristic of the person. If we are called upon to name more precisely the condition of people so described the least that they have a right to expect is that we will attribute to them their own individual cognitive problems rather than those of a carelessly drawn social stereotype. ‘Mental Retardation’ is to, say, ‘apraxia’ as ‘act of god’ is to ‘road trauma’ — a transferring of manageable contingency into the realm of the unchanging and inevitable. We are moving these people out of segregated settings back into the community; it is time we desegregated their diagnoses and appraised their problems not against the name we created to explain them but against the same conditions we are prepared to attribute to other people in the community.
End Quote

There’s another interesting article on the same web site–fascinating comparison of African-Americans and IQ and people with Down syndrome and IQ

http://www.vichealth.vic.gov.au/~borth/down1.htm

I know it seems so picky to worry about what individuals call “the mentally retarded” but naming practices influence treatment and self-valuation and societal acceptance and treatment.

42

smilingjaws:

“I guess I just feel very uncomfortable and awkward around Jews. I hate feeling that way, but perhaps I’m just not used to them.”

I don’t see what’s wrong with this statement. Let me give you an example:
A year ago I moved to Los Angeles from Ontario, Canada. Now, everywhere I’ve lived in Canada (and that includes two of the three biggest cities) I haven’t encountered many black or hispanic people. I got here, where whites are the minority, and I found, to my shame, that I felt nervous around black and hispanic people I met on the street. Mostly I was afraid of offending them, but I did have to force myself to act normally around them.

Do you know why? They were exhibiting body language I wasn’t accustomed to. It took me almost six months to finally adapt to reading the different body signals, and to normalise my own body language. Now I have no problems at all.

Everyone goes through this when meeting people of a culture they have no experience with. I went through it in eastern Europe too, although (almost) everyone there shared my skin colour. It’s just not a problem, unless you make it one.

43

I have a question about this “age-appropriate” issue, with regard to the people who are 25 or 30 or 40 years old wanting to do crafts or play with dolls or watch “Barney”.
Sure, they are 25 (or whatever) chronologically, but what is their developmental age? If someone who is DD is actually at the intellectual level of a child, then why not let them do activities for a child?
What is the harm in letting them do something they like and which gives them pleasure? What is wrong with doing crafts? I watch “Barney” and “Blue’s Clue’s” with my 4-year-old…is that okay?
What administrative dipshit made this rule anyway?

FTR, I have a neighbor who collects dolls (the ones from QVC and The Franklin Mint)…is she exhibiting behavior that is not “age-appropriate”?

44

This is one of the things that really bothers me also. If a child or adult has a hobby or interest that does them no physical harm, and brings them great enjoyment, why should some other adult be able to deny that person enjoyment just because s/he happens to be developmentally delayed or disabled. Power seems to corrupt people in all walks of life, even those in the field of caring for developmentally disabled people(who seemingly would have entered the field in the first place to help others).

45

** Kinsey **, if I may try to shed some light on the reasoning (PLEASE NOTE I am NOT necessarily defending the practice as it is played out)

Remember the movie "What ever happened to “Baby Jane?” and the creepy sense you get when seeing an aged Bette Davis dressed as a child? that’s pretty much what they’re concerned with.

The problem with the term “Developmental age” is that it attempts to place a number that refers to a mental image of how mature some one would be at any particular point. When I look around at my friends, my son, etc., there isn’t one that I would assign a “single” developmental age to. My son, for example, would be a “30” year old in dealing with girlfriend relationships, a “8 year old” when it comes to doing math homework, a 16 year old when it comes to the telephone, etc.

So, with an individual who is chronologically 30, they may have the cognative abilities of a 12 year old, the relationship maturity of an 18 year old, a hobby interest similar to a 10 year old, etc.

When working with folks with developmental disabilities, the goals include allowing the person to progress and integrate within society in the best way possible.

46

I can see what your point is and that can be a good thing, to help people fit in with other people and avoid ridicule in public situations. But if a developmentally delayed or disabled person wants to have dolls or toys in their residence, as many non-delayed or non-disabled people do, I think they should have that right also to choose what hobbies and/or recreation they would like to do.

47

** Spider woman ** I don’t disagree. I was attempting to paraphrase the official rationale for why. I have lots -o- friends who work with that system, and have heard it all.

Frankly, when you come into MY office, you’ll see my Bugs Bunny basket, my looney tunes calculator etc. And while I don’t have a stuffed Barney, I ** do ** wear my Bugs Bunny musical watch to high power meetings, just 'cause I think SOME levity would be good.

So, I think the group that convinced the woman to leave the stuffed Barney at home to “guard the house” did a good thing (to bring it to a restaurant would attract potential negative attention to her) but to take Barney away totally? nope.

48

Sounds like we’re on the same page (unless this sends the thread into page two).

49

Thank you, Suo Na!

And like I said-leave the big stuffed Barney at home (he’d be kind of awkward as well!) and maybe a little Barney keychain to take out!
:smiley:
Smilingjaws-I think you took my remark TOTALLY out of context.
:rolleyes:

50

Sorry if I took your statement out of context. I was using it as an example and meant ABSOLUTELY no personal insult to you.
I hope that you will accept my most sincere apology.

51

No probs-appology accepted.
:slight_smile:

52

There once was a young man who I’ll call Ted (not his real name). He was a little different from most people, he couldn’t’ learn things like other people and was often ridiculed for this. He was fortunate to have a family who loved him very much. When his parents became older they felt that they were unable to care for him and thinking that they were doing the best they could for him, placed him in an institution populated with other people who were “different” too. They thought that this would be the best place for Ted. His parents and brother came to visit him often but it was nothing like being able to live at home. He was twenty years old but still very much a child.

He spent the next forty years living in this institution until one day his brother came to him and said that they would be closing the institution and he would be going to live in the city. Ted liked this idea very much because his brother lived in the city and he could see his brother all the time rather than a few times a month. He had rarely ever left the institution during his time there.

Some of his friends moved with him and when he arrived at his new home he discovered that he would have his own room, something he didn’t have in the institution. People here treated him like a normal person and took the time to teach him a great many things. He soon met another man who was forty years old. He had something they called Down’s syndrome. This man was very cheerful and liked all the same things that Ted did, his name was Bob. Ted discovered that Bob couldn’t do many of the things that Ted had learned so Ted helped his friend whenever he could. Ted would take Bob out to the store, out for coffee, and to church on Sundays. Ted was always happy to help anyone. Bob and Ted both loved playing the harmonica so they would sit together and play music to the delight of their other friends. These two soon became inseperable.

Over time Ted realized that something was wrong with Bob, even though Bob was much younger than Ted he began to act like an old man. He forgot how to do the simplest of things and sometimes forgot who people were. People told Ted that Bob had Alzheimers. When Bob wouldn’t listen to anyone else he would listen to Ted. When Bob would cry Ted would put his arm around him and comfort him until Bob fell asleep. Ted worried about his best friend and did everything he could to make him comfortable. He did his laundry, helped him get dressed and shaved and made sure his hair was combed. Ted always carried his harmonica because it always made Bob happy when he played their favourite songs. Even though Ted’s health was also deteriorating his devotion to Bob never faltered.

It was shortly after Bob’s 60th birthday that Bob passed away in his sleep. Ted was devastated. It was at this time he met a little boy while he was out on one of his walks. This little boy wasn’t afraid of him and they soon became the best of friends. The boys mother was initially afraid of Ted because he was different from other people but after she talked with people who had known Ted she realized how kind Ted was and that no harm would come to her son if Ted was with him. Ted and the little boy became friends and this softened the loss Ted felt about Bob.

Ted used to visit the boy every Saturday morning and they would sit and watch cartoons and play with Pokemon cards. The boys mother often invited Ted to come over for dinner, something that Ted liked very much.

One morning the little boy waited for Ted to come and play with him but Ted never showed up. The little boy went to Ted’s house and was told that Ted had fallen and was in the hospital. The boy and his mom went to the hospital to see Ted and the mother had to tell the boy that his friend was going to die soon and that he would never leave the hospital. She explained that Ted was nearly eighty years old .

I worked with Ted and saw firsthand the kindness and devotion he demonstrated to everyone, especially towards Bob. They were like brothers. Although Ted had problems of his own he never complained, he always put everyone else first. I wonder what his life would have been like if he had always been treated like everyone else.

Ted passed away almost a year to the day after Bob did, he was seventy nine.

Ted’s funeral was attended by a great number of people from the neighborhood including the little boy and his mother. The little boy asked to speak at the service and between sobs he said that Ted was the best friend he ever had. Bob’s brother was almost unable to speak as he recalled all the things that Ted had done for his brother in the twenty years he had known him. He told the people gathered that when he had seen Ted in the hospital Ted had said he was going to heaven so that he could take care of Bob.

Ted was certainly different from other people. I never saw him as limited but as a warm and kind human being who always put others first.

I wish more people were as different as Ted was.

53

Feynn, you have once again brought tears to my eyes. I haven’t posted to this thread because I honestly couldn’t hold my anger at first.

I hope and pray that if the time ever comes that I can’t look after my son, he has someone like you in his life to love and care for him. You are an incredible person who has such a true sense of what life should be. The men you care for and nurture are very lucky.

Knowing that my son would be cared for and respected for what he CAN do as opposed to what he CANT do would bring me peace.

54

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At this point in the thread I would like to thank, once again and for all time, the Canadian Association for Community Living, especially the Welland, Ontario branch, who treat their clients like human beings.

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