My wife and I met because of a shared interest - both huge Kate Bush fans. But we found we were perfectly suited for each other very quickly. We both love movies - normal enough, but we both love sitting right up front. We both love to read - again, common enough, but we both always need something to read while eating.
Our first movie date was “48 Hours”, and we both enjoyed this big action comedy. But the real clincher was at my apartment. “The Elephant Man” was on HBO. By the end, we were both blubbering wrecks. She tells me that this was when she knew we were destined for each other.
You put it very well. Four weeks after we met, the woman who would become my wife told me that she was in love with me. Now, every relationship book in the world will tell you that that’s one of the biggest no-no’s around – “It’s way too soon, you’ll scare him off,” etc. But it was fine for us because, and I don’t know a better way to say it, we were meant to be together.
I’d put an abusive marriage, then an abusive relationship behind me. One night I stayed up all night reading Vitamin C for the Soul, I prayed, “Lord, if you’ve a mate for me, send him, and keep me from getting stupid until he shows up.”
A few days later, our pastor (at the time he was about 60 yrs old) told us, “A young guy will be here next week. Let’s welcome him back.” At the time, I was thinking he would be about my kids’ ages. Larry showed up. His bro-in-law, who attended our church, had a gospel group. Larry played bass. Said gospel group played at a church picnic. I tried to check out the bass player; he kept his head down, but he did have a nice butt.
A few weeks later, we were thrown together; (Moms Mabley: “That ol’ man was so ugly he hurt mah feelings.”). Larry wasn’t much to look at (from the front), but he showed a wonderfly dry sense of humor. As I got to know him better, I saw that he could be a wonderful friend. More? One night, I sat in front of him at worship. As we sat down, him behind me, he told me, “I’ll always have your back.”
I believe when the Holy Spirit speaks, I’d better listen. Larry & I married six months after we met. He’s the first man I’ve ever really trusted, and in eleven years (coming up on 6/14), he’s the only man I’ve ever trusted to have my back.
It was only supposed to be anonymous sex, but within minutes the “anonymous” disappeared, and we both had the same feeling of “oh-god-I-hope-he-feels-the-same-way-I-do.” It started with our bodies plugging into each other, with a perfect fit. And it wasn’t long before we realized our minds and souls would fit the same way. That was 20.5 years ago, and I’m still amazed that he feels the same way I do.
After our first date, I was totally excited and thrilled to be getting to know him. Three and a half weeks later, I knew I was in love. He knew he was in love the next day. Four weeks later, he proposed - completely spontaneously. We both just knew it was right. We’ll celebrate our 7th wedding anniversary on Monday.
And no, I had never felt like that before. I was only 19!
Not the first time we met, as I hadn’t eaten all day and my sgar was low, leading me to be a cranky, half-drunken bitch who scarfed her food and left before she could puke in front of the new (HAWT) guy.
The next time I saw him, it was at a party. Every single other person miraculously disappeared - I honest to God think they had an orgy in the hostesses bedroom - and left Joe and I alone in the living room. We talked to each other a little bit…okay we talked a lot. We spent about three hours talking to each other, and didn’t even notice when the other guests came back and resumed partying. “Wow,” thinks I, “He’s cute and fun to talk to, and seems really smart! Every guy I meet for the rest of my life will pale in comparison to him.”
It took us several months to officially begin dating, though. We were both gun shy, so we both preened and threw lots of meaningful glances at each other, before he finally got up the courage to ask me out. Both of us were amazed (and happily so!) that the other one felt the same way, and we’ve been inseperable ever since.
My husband and I met on a blind date. Date one was pleasant, but nothing amazingly wonderful. I had an inkling that something serious was going on during our second date, and after our third hanging out (I don’t think it qualified as a technical date) the next evening, I couldn’t eat or sleep for the next couple of days, I was so overwhelmed. I was pretty sure I’d marry him after four weeks, and as sure as one could ever be after six.
He took months longer, FWIW, but we’re coming up on our second wedding anniversary.
I’m the odd one —as usual. I wasn’t sure he was the one until about 2 years after we’d been living together. We both had some growing we needed to do. As a matter of fact I can easily see how things might have turned out differently had either of us not matured together.
It wasn’t a sudden thing either. It was more like two vines entwining until after awhile you don’t wonder, “Can I separate those two vines?” You think, “I thought there were two vines, but that’s just one big plant.”
For the record, We met August 4, 1996. He moved in April of 1997. And we both know it’s for good.
I knew within weeks of our first date. I suspected strongly before that.
I already knew her from a few environmental things we did together. She was my type with long brunette hair and great legs and very cute. She was intelligent and knowledgeable. She was a trained engineer working as a programmer. We shared a passion for the environment and were both tech oriented. We had similar music tastes and she had beautiful soulful brown eyes that I melted into.
I dated few girls before her, but she was my first love.
I couldn’t wait to see her, one evening early on, I took my parents to the symphony for their anniversary and part way through I called my girl to see if I could meet her after I dropped my parents back off at home. I ran up to Hoboken and I think we went into the city that night. Yep, I knew she was the one rather quick.
Jim (Now of course we are an older married couple with two kids and get on each other’s nerves, but I still love her very much. I do miss those early feelings of fresh love though. )
I’ve always had serial crushes–and for the duration of the crush, I was head over heels. This began in 2nd grade, when I fixated on a boy in my class, and just continued right up until very recently. So when I began chatting with my future husband online, it wasn’t a big surprise for me to develop a crush on him. We met online in April 1998, but began chatting regularly in June 1998. I was in love by July. I was 15. I had never met him face to face. Everybody told me I wasn’t in love, it was just a childish crush, like the dozens I had before, and to get over it. But man, I wasn’t listening. I had never been so in love in my (admittedly short) life. By the time I did meet him in September, I knew he was mine. There’s just no other way to describe it.
This will sound incredibly stupid, but I knew the first time he kissed me. I don’t believe in soul mates or “the one” but when he kissed me, everything else just disappeared. It was like I’d been waiting my whole life for that kiss. I know how dopey that sounds but there you go. Of course, I doubted the whole thing for a couple of months but by month three, we were both sure.
I knew SWMBO originally as just a parent of one of my students. Her marriage broke up about 4 months after her son started. Mine broke up about a year later.
One day, we talked to each other outside of our roles as parent and instructor. We haven’t stopped talking since. In 5 days, we will celebrate our 182nd anniversary (I do them monthly - it’s about the only way I can keep a step ahead of her ).
My first day of grad school, I attended a law school class, although I was not then in law school. I noticed my soon-to-be-husband across the room and thought he was kind of cute. Towards the end of the class, he made some observations about the nature of the state. I fell in love with him as soon as I heard him speak.
That night, a friend asked me how my first day of graduate school had gone and I told her that I had met the man I was going to marry. I meant it, too, although we didn’t actually meet until the next time that class met. We were married five months later.
Unfortunately, he died several years ago, but while he was alive, I never felt a second’s doubt that we would be together for the rest of our lives. I have certainly never felt anything like that before or since.
This has come up before. As mentioned, the wife and I met as grad students at the U of Hawaii (just like Obama’s parents ). We’ve tried to think back and remember, but there seems to be no particular point in time that we can recall. At some point in our 2-1/2 years there, it became assumed that we would get married, but neither of us remembers the subject being broached originally, and there was certainly no formal popping of the question.
Actually, we did not start dating until the end of our first school year, so we were not actually together 2-1/2 years in Hawaii. A year after we started dating, at the end of our second school year I took her to the mainland for the first time. I still had close relatives to introduce her to. By that time, it must have been decided. So within a year. Say … six months then maybe?
Since we only knew each other for about 3 months before we got married I guess it was rather quickly. It sure doesn’t seem like it has been 10 years already though.
It took about 10 months for me to feel that I wanted to live with him, so I guess that’s when. Though it was another 2-4 months before we started making jokes about “forever” (e.g., “Great, I get to put up with you tweaking my nose for the rest of my life…”), and another 8 months before I actually moved in with him. I think he followed roughly the same timeline as me, but I didn’t really know that he felt as strongly about me until he gave me a pair of diamond stud earrings for my graduation last month. From him, that’s as good as an engagement ring.
To answer the OP’s second question, I have never felt that anyone else was “the one.” I’ve never even wanted to live with anyone before. I’m 36, and this 1.5-year relationship is the longest one I’ve ever had – and absolutely the most serious.
I told him the day after I met him that I was falling in love with him. At the time, I was extremely unavailable. I was in a career incompatible with any type of relationship, and one that I thought I would be in for a long long time, and which entailed traveling and living in a different country (I was only back for a quick visit when I met him). So I didn’t feel like I had anything to lose by saying that to him. I certainly wasn’t planning to be with him. But that’s how I felt. Well, he felt that way too…though he didn’t say that. I don’t remember what he said - I wasn’t looking for a response.
In his first email to me, after we had spent as much of four days together (but no nights) as possible, he told me he thought we should get married. I didn’t think it was odd at all. I thought so too but it seemed not doable. He wore me down and we got married four months after we met. We are as happy as can be and everyone says we are meant for each other, perfect for each other, et cetera. I can’t imagine being without him. Now we’ve known each other a little more than a year – I know it hasn’t been that long in chronological time – but it feels just like destiny. I had never ever felt that way about anyone before, and I was 34 when we got married.
Brainiac4 and I met in high school. We spent 11 years in the same circle of friends, I got married and divorced, both of us dated a lot of other people. After eleven years we started dating. Figuring we’d either be together forever, or blow up fantastically after about three months, he kept his apartment when he moved in with me, labeled all the CDs he brought into the house, and prepared for the mushroom cloud. After three months, no mushroom cloud and we got engaged sometime after that. Twelve years and counting.
But yes, I married “the One” earlier, who by the time I married him I knew he wasn’t “the One.” But I was sure of it early on. And I don’t really believe in “the One” - I believe there is more than one person out there for everyone, but matches are a minority, it isn’t just anyone will do.
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