How To Get Yourself In Trouble

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

The conversation, five minutes ago:

My Wife: Did you put the laundry in the dryer yet?
Me: I didn’t do any laundry.
My Wife: Why not? You told me earlier that you were about to do laundry.
Me: When did I say that?
My Wife: You asked me to hand you a towel because you were about to do laundry.
Me: Ahh…there’s the problem. Yes, I said that, but I wasn’t actually about to do laundry.
My Wife: Then why did you say that??
Me: Where was the towel when I asked?
My Wife: Wrapped around me.
Me: Why?
My Wife: Because I had showered…
Me: And what else were you wearing?
My Wife: …nothing.
Me: And there we go. What seemed like an innocous request for some dirty laundry was actually my devious plan to see you naked. One that worked perfectly, I might add.

So now, apparently, I’m in trouble. Some folks just can’t take being outsmarted, it seems…
I wonder if I should try the old “My car just hit a water buffalo” one next time…

2

“Hand me the towel, I want you naked.”

You could be enjoying a laundry-free day.

3

A while back we had virtually the same conversation, except ours involved lingerie.

Worked out the same way for me too.

4

zoid: Hey! Gimme your underwear!
zoidwife: ???
zoid: I wanna wash my car
zoidwife: :dubious:

Never works for me either.

5

Sometimes my wife can’t make up her mind as to what she’ll where to work, and she’ll come downstairs to model for me and the boys to give our opinions. Well, mine anyway. Fang is often oblivious, and Spike always like the blue one. More often than not the conversation ends up like:

Mrs Magill: “Maus, which do you like? This one? or [changes shirts] This one?”

Me: “Let me see that first one again?”

Mrs Magill: [changes shirt] “This one?”

Me: “Hmm… how’s that second one look?”

Mrs Magill: [changes shirt] “You like this one?”

Spike: “My like the bloo one.”

Me: “I like the middle one.”

Mrs Magill: sigh I have to where a shirt to work, Maus."

6

“If it’s just a small load then you could do it by hand.”

7

Tell her you were doing her a favor because the towel made her look fat.
That’ll get you out of trouble.

8

Nicely done. Nothing like taking matters into your own hands. Win!:smiley:

9

Agreed. lieu has just won the Internet. I think we’re done here. Time to move on to underwater basket weaving.

10

See, being female, I can’t get myself into trouble like that. I don’t have to ask my boyfriend for his towel to see him naked. If I so much as look at him while he’s in a towel, he’ll whip it off and start doing the naked man dance (he hasn’t figured out yet that there’s no better way to make me NOT horny than to do the naked man dance).

Anyway, I also got myself in trouble today (although he doesn’t know it yet). I told him I’d do a load of towels on Saturday. And I DID. Trouble is, I forgot that I washed them. When I went to find a towel today, I found a whole mess of them, in the washer, wet, stinky, and just eww. How many times will I have to wash them before they stop smelling like mildew?

11

While thinking of this plan, did you say “this plan is sheer elegance in its simplicity?”

If so, that’s why you failed and by saying that, you are also probably an evil villain.

12

Bolding mine.

LOL. I just squirted cherry pepsi out of nose trying not to spew it on the monitor. If we ever made it able for dogs* to talk that is totally how they would talk. Thank you for brightening my day.

  • I’m assuming you have dogs. For all I know you could have sea monkeys.
13

Wash them with some vinegar.

14

Just vinegar? Vinegar and detergent? How much vinegar? Hot or cold water? Do I have vinegar?

15

Pour a few cups of white distilled vinegar in the machine and wash the clothes in hot water. Then run a normal cycle with detergent.

16

Awesome. Thanks. As soon as I figure out where the vinegar is, I’ll do that.

17

Take off your clothes and he won’t care.

18

You have a very good point there. The only problem with that is that it doesn’t fix the stinky moldy towel problem.

19

He’ll forget about that too when you get out of the shower soaking wet and towel-less.

20

Hmmm, we do have a heated bed…the wet hair might short-circuit it though.