The issue is not whether it’s “attainable” or not. It’s more a question of how representative it is.
Take the issue of uber-skinny models. No-one argues that uber-skinny women don’t exist in real life. And no-one argues that all uber-skinny women have eating disorders. The issue is that basically all models are considerably skinnier than average, and that this incredible over-representation of skinny women in magazines and on TV gives an unrealistic view of the world.
Similarly, no-one is arguing that no women like facials and swallowing, or that no women like anal sex, or whatever. The issue, for someone attempting to explain this stuff to a young person looking at porn, is that the range and frequency of many sex acts represented in porn are completely unrepresentative of what a person is likely to find in real life.
Here’s a little quiz for you:
What percentage of women in porn take a guy’s ejaculation in the face and/or in the mouth? What percentage do you think do so in real life? Are these numbers in any way congruent?
Same question, for:
[ul]
[li]anal sex[/li][li]gangbangs (multiple men, one woman)[/li][li]double penetration[/li][li]2-3 women on 1 man[/li][li]ass to mouth[/li][li]sexual positions designed to show as much as possible to the camera, rather than for pleasure/comfort[/ul][/li]Also, leaving aside the sex acts themselves, your dismissal of the acting/plot stuff precisely misses the point, because porn generally shows scenarios that are, for the most part, completely unrealistic in terms of how sex partners get together in the first place.
It portrays every woman as immediately available and willing to do whatever the guy wants, in pretty much any circumstance. It gives the impression that women like nothing better then being called (and referring to themselves as) sluts, whores, tramps, etc., and being told what to do, with no consideration of their own pleasure. It gives the impression that every woman is screaming with ecstasy the moment a penis enters her, and that women need nothing except some quick thrusting to achieve orgasm every time.
I’m not arguing that there’s anything wrong with porn, as such. I don’t give a damn if people look at it, and have no desire for it to be censored or banned. As i said above, i’ve looked at my share, starting back when i was about 10 years old myself. Similarly, if you’re in a relationship where your partner likes to do any and all of the stuff that’s portrayed in porn, that’s great too. If it’s between two (or more) consenting adults, i think anything goes.
But while some of the stuff in porn might reflect what some people do some of the time, that doesn’t mean that porn isn’t unrealistic.
but I would never do this to my kids because when she was wrong it hurt…and it taught me the lesson that authority was stupid and that the opinions of adults/adult values had little value.