Sorry, no it’s not pre-laundered. You’ll still have to prove where YOU got the income from. The fact that the criminals laundered it through, say, a laundromat has no bearing on you proving where you got the income.
To launder the money, you have to come up with some way to justify how YOU got the money. For instance, some cash business with loose record keeping requirements. One novel I read had the launderer (actually launderess) start a handmade jewelry business where she sold her jewelry at fairs and the like. She’d go away for a weekend, make up some receipts, and voila, legal money. Of course, she’d also have to buy enough supplies to make that amount of jewelry supposedly sold. Also, of course, you don’t get rich doing this.
I saw the Jumper movie, but didn’t realize there was a book series. At the time, I thought they were inspired by Phyllis Eisentein’s Alaric books, like Born to Exile. In those stories, teleportation would only work if you could place the destination in relation to your current position, so Alaric traveled around on foot building an elaborate map of the world in his head.
My first inclination would be to test it out for people to make sure I wasn’t insane, and if they agreed I actually was teleporting (and it wasn’t all in my head), I’d offer myself up for study.
I was thinking of laundered as being “money the government isn’t already looking for and can trace.” That would only be an issue if you’re at the Bentley dealership with a duffle bag full of cash.
Want to live beyond your means without suspicion? Max out your credit cards and use your ill-gotten gains to pay the minimum balance on time each month. The credit companies will keep extending your limits and sending you new cards as long as the payments are regular and there’s nothing odd about an American living under the (imagined in this case) threat of crushing debt - you’re hiding in plain sight. From what I’ve seen in the movies, cc interest rates aren’t much worse than more accepted losses incurred cleaning income.
Side benefit, friends and family get that smug feeling of superiority waiting for the hammer to fall - the gift that keeps on giving, yet no skin off your nose.
Sure, but if you’re not a usual suspect and you do take those precautions, it’s about impossible for you to get caught or even suspected.
I mean, I’m a 300 lb 6’1" white male with no police record, a professional job, and a family.
For example, If I was to zap into the Tower of London, steal the Crown Jewels (wearing my hood & generically soled shoes), zap to my fence, give him the goods, take my payment and zap back to Texas, there would be NO reason to assume that I was the thief- what reason would there be to suspect a 41 year old IT guy from Texas who had an alibi of being at home in Texas in bed that night?
Knowing that being able to teleport doesn’t give me eyes in the back of my head, I would endeavor to have a hypnotic suggestion implanted that would cause me to teleport to a “safe house” if I am hit from behind and/or or start to rapidly lose consciousness.
The last thing I’d do is tell anyone. Once it was known I could do this, I’m sure my wife or children would be kidnapped to force me to reveal the secret which according to the OP I can’t do. And even if they believed I didn’t know, I’d be forced into doing all kind of things I didn’t want to.
I just don’t see the need to try to “clean up” with this… but maybe I simply lack ambition. It seems to me that if I just use it to tweak my life rather than radically change it I can coast along with minimum to no suspicion. I mean, just saving the $20/week I spend on gas means another $1,000 or so a year in my pocket. Little things like that add up. The trick is not to get greedy. Emulate the methods of Emerich Juettner and it should be a long time before you’re uncovered, if ever, especially since there’s no law against teleporting and indeed most authorities will believe it impossible anyway. Use it to make your life a little easier rather than making radical changes.
I would get off the bus, teleport two stops down and get back on. Leave something small when I get off again, teleport to the next stop, pretending to be out of breath to get the item back. But considering how fast buses are that may not be to surprising.
Maybe go to the top floor of a tall building and make a show of missing the elevator, then if the same people get off at the bottom I pretend to dust myself off and explain I took the shortcut.
Seems to me you could, but you would bring the rope with you. Of course, if you bring the post with you too but it’s no longer in the ground, escape would be much easier.
It would be funny if I actually teleported to the middle of one of the 200 movie sets in Hollywood depicting the Oval Office, which I’ve probably seen more often than the real thing.
You’ll want to take more precautions than that. Consider other physical attributes like body size, gait analysis, thermal fingerprinting. None of these will identify you today, but they are all data points that might be being recorded today. Some day in the future they’ll be part of a massive corpus of data that pattern recognition and anomaly detection software runs against, and these data points will help narrow it down to you.
In fact, if you have this teleportation and just want to be left alone - the days of being able to use it anonymously to get around the planet for free are coming to an end. Sooner or later the surveillance systems will notice your face appearing in all these disparate locations without you ever going through border checkpoints. Start thinking about only going to isolated locations.
A cordless drill will easily get you into any of the locks within the vault. They spend all of their money keeping you out of the vault, once you’re in, it doesn’t take too much work.
A better heist may be an armored car service. They carry lots of cash. Get a solid alibi such as being out of the country staying at an expensive hotel with security cameras showing you never left your room and you should be set.
I’m too much of an asshole to be given power like that. I’d quickly start using for personal gain.
How specific do pictures have to be? For example, I could travel to Mars using one of Curiosity’s photos, but could I travel to Pluto by using the Hubble images?
If the answer to the Pluto question is yes, then that means I could use a picture of the Milky Way to travel the whole galaxy, or our pictures of Andromeda, for that matter.
Also, is time travel allowed? Say if I have a picture of the interior of a house in 1940, and that house has been knocked down and turned into a mall. If I tried to teleport to the pictured room in the house, would I end up back in time, or in the corresponding spot in the new mall?
If the teleportation is instantaneous, i.e. there’s no speed-of-light delay between disappearing here and appearing there, then time travel is already included part and parcel. If not, then I’d guess that the photo of the 1940s house is just like any other picture of a nonexistent place, i.e. not something you’d be able to jump to.
has no bearing on you proving where you got the income.