Sadly, I have not noticed that I possess any cool powers yet. I’ll be sure to keep you updated.
Anyway, just came from getting my back adjusted. I asked my chiropractor if I could have a copy of my x-ray, so I could scan it and show everyone on my LJ friends list how weird my spine looks. I got a negative on that (well, technically I could, but it sounds like more trouble that it’s worth), but he showed me the technician’s report on the x-ray.
And holy fuck, I AM MISSING A RIB. I have twelve ribs on my left side and only eleven on my right! AHHHHH!!! I am like, some crazy monster creature! My spine is messed up because the right side of a couple of my vertabrae aren’t fully formed and apparently that extended to the rib, which just never formed at all!
How come no one told me this til I was 26 years old, that’s what I want to know? What other things could be wrong with me that no one bothered to tell me? Now I am all paranoid!
Welcome to the mutant club! I’ll see your missing rib and raise you a third breast. (TMI to follow.)
See, when my daughter was born, I decided to nurse her. It takes a couple days for the milk to come in. The day mine did, I found, in the shower, an enormous lump under my left arm. Scared the crap out of me, and I all but ran to the doctor’s office, thinking my gawd, what if it’s breast cancer and I die and leave this poor baby with no mother??
Doc gave me a thorough exam and then explained to me that functional breast tissue can occur anywhere from under the arm to pretty near the belly button… and I had a little extra breast tissue under my arm that had filled up with milk. He said the swelling would go down in a few days, when my OTHER two breasts became less engorged.
(This is why, when you do a breast self-exam, you’re told to feel under your arms, BTW.)
He didn’t, but I doubt it. At least the way I’m missing my rib, I know it’s not. The congenital abnormality in my spine is extremely unusual. I’ve had two doctors x-ray my spine and both have said they’ve never seen anything like it before.
I am special.
I was all excited for a second, until I remembered that my dental x-rays usually turn out okay. Damn.