I am sick, sick, sick! of . . . .

  1. Explaining the flipping McDonald’s lawsuit to people who think it is the acme of the judicial system run amok, but who really have no idea of the facts behind the case – and who apparently have no interest in understanding what really happened.

  2. Answering hypotheticals that have no relevance to the issue at hand. In the immortal words of Phil, “If my aunt had balls, she’d be my uncle.” “What if the contract provided B [which it doesn’t]?” What if monkeys flew out your butt?

  3. Dealing with people who think it’s okay to patronize me because I’m (relatively) young in my profession. The admitted pleasure of eventually handing their heads to them does not outweigh the frustration of being patted on the head (or the fanny) by a bunch of old men.

  4. Watching a dead horse being beating into sub-atomic particles when a subject is long past having any relevance to anything currently occurring or likely to occur in the future.

  5. Having days so surpassingly bad and frustrating that I’m reduced to venting in the Pit.

Ah. I feel better. Anyone else want to play?

I hear you! The day I turned thirty I proudly announced to all in my law firm that they had to stop calling me a “kid” from now on! Sheesh! I’m handling millions of dollars’ worth of cases and making law at the appellate level, and still being called “kid.”

Don’t worry, jodi, you’ll grow out of it. :wink:

But slap the bastards that pat your fanny. Even in – Montana, is it? – that’s gotta be harassment and/or assault.


[q]4. Watching a dead horse being beating into sub-atomic particles when a subject is long past having any relevance to anything currently occurring or likely to occur in the future. [/q]

Hay! Watch it!

And Melin agrees that this is annoying?

D.E., whoever you are, thanks for the laugh – I needed it. :slight_smile:

Hear hear! In my case, it’s “Are you an engineer?” No, asshole, I put the letters “PE” (professional engineer, meaning that I hold a license to practice engineering) after my name because I like the way they sound.

Someday, someday, there will be more women in this field, and these things won’t happen. I should live that long.

Never attribute to malice anything that can be attributed to stupidity.
– Unknown

There will be more women in engineering precisely 20 years after there are more little girls who want to play with Tinkertoys than want to play with Barbie.

Until that happens, engineering will be dominated by us geeky males.

Let’s hear it for the geeky males. Although I remember getting out of programming ot get away from the geeks. Oops.

I, however, wouldn’t mind a few more women in the profession.

Dopeler effect:
The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

Jodih, I’m assuming you are an attorney, BTW. With all due respect, explaining the the McDonalds lawsuit to people should be the least of your worries. Not everyone is enlightened as you are about law. (That is not a slam, although it sounds like it.) What pisses me off is attorneys who think that the public are a bunch of no-nothing goons that need to be belittled or pooh-poohed because we don’t know as much as you. (Okay, I guess THAT was a slam). Isn’t that WHY you’re an attorney? To fill us in on the law and how it works? Isn’t that why people hire you? WE don’t know what’s irrelevant. THAT’S WHY WE PAY YOU. If we could figure these things out on our own, we wouldn’t need you. Be patient with the “little people”. Maybe a career change is in order.

Please forgive me–I’m leaving my job to work in the accounting department of a law firm and everyone is telling me that lawyers are hard to work with. I guess I’m “putting up my dukes” a little early in preparation. Sorry for the outburst. I feel better now, too.

“They have the internet on computers now.”–Homer J. Simpson


:::sigh::: I (barely) remember when they used to call me kid. It was a long time ago. . . .


And I always thought that engineers simply couldn’t spell “pee”.


My sister’s been a legal secretary for over twenty years. She says they’re almost like people: some good, some bad.

(She has been known to accent the almost.)

Well ya know, that old lady was stupid for holding that coffee cup that way while she was driving.

Just kidding! Actually, I know what you mean. I feel the same way about some issues. The public perception of an issue will very often be sort of poisoned at birth by misinformation. But anyway, that’s what the Straight Dope is for, right? I mean, you’re in the right place, more or less.

My pet peeve is people always saying that Japan doesn’t have any armed forces. I tell them Japan is the world’s fourth-largest defense spender, and they scoff. Woe is me.


Relax. I worked for the legal department of a gigantic airline for about 3 years. I did a bunch of programming and database admin stuff. It was “good duty” as far as I was concerned. I found attorneys to be great users and clients. They always remembered what they said, what you said, and how thing should work. Their requirements were always well written and clear (unlike so many other requirements I’ve seen).

Oh, and attorneys are smarter than you average bear. You always want to work with/for smart people. The dumb ones wear on you.


I can understand what was said about not being taken seriously in your chosen profession because of your age. I am 25 and can run circles around my manager and everyone else I work with, but I am forced to be in the lowest spot on the team because I am young. I busted my ass to learn what I know. True I never went to school to learn it. I just have OJT and self study, but I hold the same certifications that my “superiors” have, and more years of experience.

Basically, they need to understand that this ain’t my first rodeo. I know what I’m doing, I am damn good at it, and they can kiss my ass if they think being young means I am any less knowledgeable than they are.



DEWAHOLIC – You’re right – I am an attorney. Specifically, I’m an Assistant Attorney General for the State of Montana.

To clarify, I don’t mind explaining legal concepts to people. Heck, I really enjoy it, in fact. When people ask (general) legal questions on the Board, I enjoy trying to answer them if I have the time – it scratches my latent teaching itch. What I mind is explaining the same thing over and over and over again to people who not only do not understand it, but who do not want to understand it. The McDonald’s case has become the poster-case for bad law, and the irony is that it really isn’t that remarkable a case. There are a lot of ridiculous cases with outrageous recoveries out there that I would have trouble explaining, but that case isn’t one of them.

In my opinion, the only dumb question is the question that’s been asked nine times before already – by the same person. That’s what I object to.

And I have no problem with that. To me, it’s more like this:

PERSON A: Hey! You just hit that guy!
PERSON B: I know it looks that way, but we’re actually practicing a fight scene for a movie.
PERSON A: Hey, everyone! Check this out! Person B just hit that guy! Just smacked the heck out of him!
PERSON B: Excuse me – didn’t you hear me? I’ve explained why this isn’t in fact what it appears to be.
PERSON A: I can’t believe you’d just hit him like that.
PERSON C: Yeah, why’d you hit him, huh?

And so on.

There are no “little people” – everyone does something different with their lives and I just happen to know more about one particular (and, really, largely useless) area of information. That doesn’t make me better than anyone else. I don’t expect you to “figure out” legal problems on your own; I do wish people would not ignore explanations where they are given. Career change? No way. I absolutely love my job.

Good luck with your new job; try not to be too wary or defensive. Lawyers are just like everyone else – mostly nice people with a smattering of assholes mixed in. Remember that the job you do at the firm is as important as the job they do (though many of them would deny that), and do it with pride and to the best of your ability. The good people will respect you for it; the bad – well, don’t let the bastards get you down.

Jodih, we need to form the SDMB State Government Attorney’s Caucaus and Musical Revue!

What type of stuff do you do for the AG?

Plunging like stones from a slingshot on Mars.

ok, so where is the guy person a hit? does he appear in this play at all? is he person d? having him in the play to explain things is essencial of course.
so possible appearances for person “hit” would be:
1: he tells everybody person a is telling the truth, and thats the end of it
2: he decides to lie and say person a accually hit him
3: person a accually hit him and lied about that movie thing.
4: person “hit” died from the fake blow and cant therefore comment on anything
5: person “hit” died from the real blow and cant therefore comment on anything
6: if it is in the us person a sues everybody for slander despite what happened
7: if it is in the us person a accally wins the case despite what happened (good lawyers or bad system?)
8: but if it was in the us, how come everybody didnt mind their own bussiness. i mean that person a could have pulled up a gun and shot everybody who meddled in on the “acting”

movie talk:
now i know why aliens always attack the us! one thing i dont know is how come the us always wins. if i was an alien i would attack greenland or the antartic first. no defences you see :wink:
its what stragedy calls “making a beach head”…or something like that

bj0rn - hic

FRANK – Fellow government lawyer! High five! ::smack:: Do you get paid a mere pittance as well? Remember, it’s public service. And the citizens thank you for it, really they do.

I do two things: I defend the State against tort claims and, upon demand, I act as an Administrative Law Judge for contested cases. The work is about 65% the former and 35% the latter. I’m the youngest attorney on staff at the A.G.'s office, and the youngest acting ALJ for state cases (just turned thirty). What do you do?


Fiat Justina

I never fully understood why you guys pick on poor ol’ Bj0rn so much. Until now …

I am sick, sick, sick of the entire American judicial system. It’s not about what the “truth” is anymore. I just want to know one thing: Did the defendant commit the crime? The most recent bad Supreme Court ruling was that the cops can’t use evidence against a guy b/c the cops found the evidence while searching the house after a freaking murder! WHY do they have to call in for a search warrant in this case? I know all about unlawful search and seizures, but I really can’t see how this was an UNREASONABLE search. A person was murdered for pete’s sake. We constantly tie the cops’ hands instead of trying to get to the truth.

Lisa, I’ve got some LA cops I’d like you to meet.

Now then. ahem I am a paralegal. Without me and my colleagues, this firm would fall apart. I have worked for attorneys that couldn’t even turn on a computer. Yes, it is my choice not to go to law school and get the big money and the JD at the end of my name, but I am doing a valuable job, dammit, and it pisses me off when some attorneys treat me as nothing more than a glorified admin clerk.

Having said that, most of the attorneys I’ve worked for have been great, and I’m certainly aware of the amount of stress they’re under. And a few words from the SDMB attorneys about how valuable paralegals are would be nice about now :slight_smile:

Of course, our firm would fall apart without our admin clerks too :slight_smile: