a peripheral friend. (I think that’s the word I’m looking for.)
Oh well, at least the word “friend” is somehow connected to me, other than “I have none.”
Can I be your friend? 
That would be nice, thank you.
I’d like to be your friend too pepper.
Pepper, I’m confused. Am I to understand from your OP that you consider yourself friendless? Say it ain’t so! It’s difficult to believe that someone with such an imaginative website (yes, I’ve visited) and your obvious intelligence and wit could be without friends. I musta misunderstood, right?
Thank you sk8rixtx and el_mono
el_mono, you have prompted me to elaborate. I told Jaime “I am a peripheral friend” and he said “So that means they are the center of your friend-universe, but you are on the outskirts of their’s?” I said, “Yeah, something like that.”
You see what I mean?
And the thought is kinda sad and depressing.
Pepper, I’m still not sure I understand but…
Have you ever read The Little Prince by Antoine Du St Exupery? If not might I suggest tracking down a copy. It offers (among other things) a wonderful explanation about the nature of friendship.
If you have read it, go back and re-read the chapters about the Little Prince’s meeting with the fox. Pay particular attention to the fox’s advice.
And hey, I’d be honored to be counted among your cyber-friends!
I’ve never read The Little Prince.
Will you please tell me about his meeting with the fox?
Sounds like your friendship is not returned?
Phases like that happen for the most of us.
That’s a tough request. The Little Prince’s meeting with the fox takes place toward the end of the book and it is from the fox that the Little Prince learns the answer to the question that he left his planet in search of. The book is so beautifully written (even in English translation) and says so much about the nature of life that I would prefer that you track down a copy and experience the magic yourself. But lets see…
After a long journey and many meetings with all sorts of interesting characters, the Little Prince encounters a fox. He is intrigued by the beautiful creature and wishes to be his friend. The fox explains to the Little Prince that there are certain rules that must be adhered to when seeking friendship. At the Little Prince’s request the fox offers an outline of the script that must be followed. While not quite understanding the reasons the Little Prince agrees to do as the fox wishes since he truely wants to be his friend. Eventually they become close friends, but having done so the Little Prince realizes that he must leave in order to complete his journey. He is sad, and so is the fox. The Little Prince doesn’t understand why he went to all of the trouble to gain the friendship of the fox when it was fated that they must part. The fox sends the Little Prince on a short trip of discovery and upon his return offers him the secret for which he has been searching all along.
“And here is my secret’ said the Fox, 'a very simple secret. It is only with the heart that one may see rightly, what is essintial is invisible to the eye.”
Oh, Pepper, I can’t do the story justice! Please go out and find a copy, read it yourself and then let me know what you think. The book was given to me as a gift when I was in my early twenties and going through some tough times. I have read it countless times and have given it as a gift to friends that I thought might benefit from its advice. It isn’t a big book, and it contains lots of pictures (which are used to illustrate many principles). Many people mistake it for a childrens book, but it is far from it. It’s all about life!
What have you got to lose?
THank you el_mono, I will pick up a copy ASAP.
Handy, it’s not that a friendship isn’t returned. The two people I’m thinking of are definitely my friends, but it’s different degrees of friendship. I would consider one of them my best friends, however, I am not her best friend. And this has been the case all my life, with every “best” friend I’ve had. I’m always second, third, or even fourth “best”.
Does it just sound like I’m whining now? I hope not.
pepper sweetie, you have your beloved. I assume he is your best friend, from what I have read in your posts.
Many of us aren’t so lucky.
And, maybe the person you consider to be your “best friend” who does not consider you to be THEIR best friend is not the person you are destined to walk through life with. I am lucky-my best friend Cindy will be with me until the day I or she dies. I hope we go together, as I am not sure that I could function without her in my life.
Anyway, you may not have found that person who is destined to be that friend for you. You are intelligent, witty and a darling. You will find the right person to be there for you.
Besides, it looks to me as though you already have-your darling man. IMHO, that is the best of both worlds.
Just depends on how you look at it.
(((((pepper)))))
Scotti
PLG,
Do you mean that they are the close friend you confide in, but they turn to someone else for those more intimate moments? That you've never had the friend that, given one person to call on, chose you?You’re welcome!
{{{pepperlandgirl}}}
(Friends can hug, right?)
Exactly.
And I do realize that I have my beloved, as Scotticher pointed out, and I cherish my relationship with him. But I want to have a girlfriend too. Someone who understands what it’s like to be, well, female. Jaime tries to be understanding when I confide in him, but there are some things that he just doesn’t “get”.
And while I’m grateful that I do have someone I feel comfortable enough to confide in, other than Jaime, I do feel hurt when she chooses someone else. I’ve never had any friend who would “choose” me.
And BlackKnight, of course they can. (((((BlackKnight))))
Pepper:
If you like I’d be willing to be you enemy. Not only that, I can be a particularly incompetant and loathsome enemy. That way you can defeat me easily and feel good about yourself.
(I figured you got so many friends we might as well try and round it out.)
THank you Scylla, I appreciate the gesture. =)
Rats! And I had this whole nefarious plan worked out…