I became Homer Simpson for a while there

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

Anyone remember that episode of “The Simpsons” where Homer got smart? I had the opposite happen to me today. First problem is that I have my period, which drains me emotionally and physically. Secondly, I had a crappy day at work. I am a case manager at an agency for Developmentally Disabled adults. In the workshop, we have this job currently that consists of stuffing a bag full of this confetti-type stuff, weighing it out to exactly 5.5 ounces, then sealing it. By the end of the day, I wanted to set the damn stuff on fire and have a BBQ.

On the way home, I realized that my brain had taken off at some point during the day. For example, I called my husband to tell him I was running late because “The cars and the other, really big cars with lots of wheel were going too slow.” He said, “You mean ‘trucks’?” “Yes!” I said, “Thanks, I couldn’t remember what those things were called.” Then I asked if we could order “one of those big round things with the cheese” for dinner. “A pizza?” “Yes! Can we get one of those?”

I seem to have recovered now, but things were foggy for a while. Has this ever happened to anyone else?

2

Yuk, confetti and PMS is like a day without a parade in the sunshine. Or something maybe kinda like that. There’s been daze when I feel like hoisting the tampon outta my body and writing with it up on the wall in a bloody trace: “Later, by Grace of All Onyond”.

That’s probably more than anyone needs to know.

But, yep, hormones are a … a… well, ya know what I think I mean.

3

While on my period, I have flooded the bathroom, twice and boiled a pot dry - which wouldn’t have been so bad but I had a plastic boiled egg timer in it (you put the plastic egg with your regular egg and the plastic one gets dark at about the same rate as the egg cooks). It took me a week to get the smell out of the house.

If I do something truly stupid, I am usually on my period.

4

I wonder if I could get away with claiming that?

Naah, nevermind, I just get stupid.