I can almost understand this spam...

It starts off normal, almost bland:

But then Ms. Nolan added a P.S.:

What is she trying to tell me? I do know someone with the last name Mcgowan; is Ms. Nolan going to assasinate her during her next RV trek? “Clump and shortfall”…I would think sneaking up behind her and pushing her off something tall would work better than clumping up and pushing her off the bottom step, but then again I have no experience as an assassin. And what does that last line mean? Is she implying that in order for her to perform this deed, I have to pay her a certain amount of crabmeat by February?

Help me, Dopers. I think…This is important. This means something.

Don’t worry about it, Number Six. All is taken care of. Relax.

McGillicutty strong to the west. bring down hose, mark all ships. Rabbit on the lee. I repeat, rabbits and not kitties. Do not attempt to respond to this message.

I’m not sure but I tried anagraming your message and got this.
Wry, sagacious monotony savages
Plant harmful scold
Beautify tube fame arrogance

Does that help?

Get Out Of The House!!!

The e-mails are coming from INSIDE the computer!

Sorry. I have no witty reply. Those words are just put in ther to defeat spam filters.

No, it’s a brilliant steganographic technique.

The subterfuge is the first part of the message, which is designed to look like something that nearly everyone will disregard without a second thought.

The “addendum” is the true message, intended for one person only, or perhaps a small cell, but sent out to a list of thousands. The “code” is trivially simple, really just a mangling to make it look like a Bayesian foil. They can even overtly mention the assassination plot, and if they trip carnivore, investigators will quickly determine that it was a bulk mailing and think no more about it.

“Guarantee if you crabmeat feb” seems like it carries no coherant information, but “crabmeat” is a punning evasion referring to a rendezvous at a prearranged location along the Tropic of Cancer, after the wetwork is accomplished.

Spammy like a Fox!

Larry, that is actually quite a clever, twisted technique you’ve just thunk up there.

People, I’ve said it before, and you’re still just not getting it. Two words:

Vogon. Poetry.

That would explain why my head exploded right after I read it.

I think Larry might be on to something here, though. Which puts him (and all of us, come to think of it, since he’s spilled the beans) in great danger. Larry, if you can hear me, don’t twist the duck! Don’t twist the duck!!

It clearly all has something to do with Jesus and Mary Magdalene having sex, guys.

Also, the Mona Lisa is involved.