I chose this major why?

If I may, an excerpt from my biomechanics textbook:

Oh. Of course. It’s so obvious now. I didn’t need to work on this homework assignment for the past two hours, the answer was right there all along!

I swear, sometimes I feel like I just don’t get it. Sure, I got a 100 on the first HW, a 90 on the second, and a 98 on the second exam, but that was the easy stuff. The third homework (which is related to this) I got a 70 on. And I thought I had that shit down! This stuff I know I’m not grasping. I mean, I think I can describe why the plot of percent strain vs time of a constant applied load of 0.2 MPa on an intervetrebral disc look like this, but I’m pretty sure I can’t explain it completly. I’ll leave something important out. And this is just the first question on the homework, I’l looking at the last one and have no clue how I’m going to do it.

Maybe it’s just that I have to get back in the habit of being in school. I took two years off between my undergrad and grad school, so that’s certainly a factor. I still haven’t found an advisor yet, choosen an area to do research in, or any of that important stuff. I kind of wish I didn’t have to be here, but I do. It’s pretty much required to go to grad school for biomedical engineering. There just aren’t a lot of entry level jobs, because the field is so broad that you need to specialize in something.

Part of me just wants to say fuck it and save myself the time, money, and frustration, but at the same time the other part of me reminds me that I need to be here if I want to go anywhere with my career, which brings me back to the question of do I even want this career in the first place.

I think I’m the undergrad version of you. Just substitute “Electrical and Computer Engineering” for “Biomedical Engineering.” Halfway through, I realized had to get out. That was last semester. Unfortunately, while I’m having doubts that any branch of engineering will suit me, I’m afraid it’s a bit late to transfer out of my engineering school now. At this point I’m just aiming for the degree so I can get the hell away from these classes.

I’m sure that did little to raise your spirits, but at least we can commiserate.

This is just so typical of grad school that I’m having flashbacks. I don’t know anyone who didn’t go through this type of soul searching a least a few times. I remember one of my profs asking me how my thesis was going and I said I was about to throw my computer out the window and go live on a beach in Mexico, his reply was 'I see you’re almost finished, then."

Just remember to keep your head down and keep going. It will be finished soon and you’ll be happy you did it.

Have you gotten to Young’s modulus yet? That’s the fun part.

Yeah, just wait until you write two arse-long papers at three in the morning about the syntax and word order of Astrophil and Stella and the traffic of opium in eighteenth and nineteenth-century England… is slightly decaffeinated and about to fall over