It’s been quite a rollercoaster ride these past several months. My wife and I have moved twice in a year…both cross country jaunts. And now we have finally decided to stay New Englanders. [sup] Thank Og[/sup]
I am working with sub-acute teens in an inpatient rehabilitation unit - I’m working mainly with kids who have been through sexual, and physical abuse.
Without getting into specifics, I am awestruck to see the state of affairs in the world today being as bloody and intolerant as it is. All naïveté aside, I hate to think that anyone must carry a gun to feel protected in this society - rural New England.
I believe I did the right thing by telling this young man to think before buying a gun to point at another human being in anger. I got to thinking on my way home "was I right in telling him this? "
I think that if you point a gun at someone in anger you could make the mistake of shootin them and going to jail for the rest of your life. Would that really be worth it?
I’m not talking about raising a gun in self defense here. I’m talking about brandishing a weapon to scare people in a public arena like a school, or play ground or basketball court.
Who the hell needs to raise a gun to scare people in public in rural New England?
I could maybe* see the need for someone in a high-crime area feeling they might neecd a gun for self-protection, but I can’t think of any areas of “rural” New England that would conceivably qualify – they’re all urban.
And brandishing a weapon seems to me a sure way to precipitate trouble, rather than ward it off.
Of course it was right. Who wouldn’t try to talk a kid out of it? Anyone who wouldn’t (particulary in your position) has no business working with troubled kids.
I’m talking eastern Connecticut, Western Rhode Island. I would think parts of MA are the same like Dracut and Deerfield areas. Places where agriculture and farming are still main stays. I’d think other places even in suburbia have similar problems. When I was growing up in Southeastern Connecticut, this was completely unheard of. Granted I grew up in the 80’s graduated highschool in 88’ this kind of thing just didn’t happen back then.
If he was sexually or physically abused, most likely there is some level of internalized paranoia about such a thing happening again
Also, rural New England had some drug issues (speaking from living my formitable years in a small fishing town in MA) and if he is troubled he might have turned to drugs as a way to cope. It is very easy to feel you need protection if you have gotten in with the bad part of the drug crowd.
I think Phlosphr did the best thing anyone could do immediately in that situation, and If Phlosphr has gained a level of trust with this kid then it could make a strong influence on his choices in the matter
#2: Never let the muzzle cover (i.e. point at) anything you are unwilling to destroy.
Carrying or pointing a gun at someone to scare him is utterly foolish; at best, you’ve committed felony assault (if unjustified); at worst, you escallate an otherwise managable situation to a potentially lethal conflict. In neither case does displaying a weapon, with no intention or justification to discharge it, in any way improve the situation.
Displaying a firearm at an aggressor with intent to use it is a situation of last resort; when you’ve exhausted all other reasonable options at diffusing or escaping the situation, and in which your life, lives of innocent people, or major property damage (arson, demolition) are at stake. The legal standard by which you may exercise the application of lethal force (which, by pointing a gun at someone, you are doing) varies from state to state, but the moral standard is that all other options have been eliminated, and the shooter is willing to accept the emotional, social, and legal consequences.
I don’t think that’s something any teenager, particularly one who has been a victim of physical or sexual abuse, has the maturity to appreciate.
I don’t feel I am necessarily judging broader society by what this youth is doing, but what I am inferring is that the state of affairs and the culture of a place where I am very familiar is changing. Keeping an objective mind and having a degree of compassion is part of my job. This is a new venture for me, so I am simply taking it one day at a time. I do believe I made the right decision.