A further addendum to Syclla’s Pathetic Prophetic Post as a female married to male for a dozen years is that if your wife starts using sarcasm, whatever you are doing is wrong.
IE: Do it her way the first time and sarcasm does not need to be unleashed.
Hope this helps.
I did this once when I was 18. I used to sell memberships at a gym, and had quite the flirtation with this cute little thing behind the front desk. One day as I was leaving, I quipped, “Hey Amanda, will you marry me?” She said, “Okay.”
The next day before work, I ran into the local grocery store and got a ring out of the quarter machines. When I gave it to her, she gave me an gold earring that looked a lot like a wedding band she had pulled out of the lost and found and put it on my finger. I wore it all day, and got a lot of comments like, “Aren’t you a little young to be married?” My response was always, “Hey, when you’re in love…”
You need to memorize these immediately. There will be a test later and she will administer it.
THE RULES
The Female always makes THE RULES.
2. THE RULES are subject to change without notice.
3. No Male can possible know all THE RULES.
4. If the Female suspects the Male knows all THE RULES, she must immediately change some of THE RULES
5. The Female is never wrong.
6. If it appears the Female is wrong, it is because of a flagrant misunderstanding caused by something the Male did or said wrong.
7. If Rule 6 applies, the Male must apologize immediately for causing the misunderstanding.
8. The Female can change her mind at any time.
9. The Male must never change his mind without the express, written consent of The Female.
10. The Female has every right to be angry or upset at any time.
11. The Male must remain calm at all times, unless the Female wants him to be angry or upset.
12. The Female must, under no circumstances, let the Male know whether she wants him to be angry or upset.
13. The Male is expected to read the mind of the Female at all times.
14. At all times, what is important is what the Female meant, not what she said.
15. If the Male doesn’t abide by THE RULES, it is because he can’t take the heat, lacks backbone, and is a wimp.
16. If the Male, at any time, believes he is right, he must refer to Rule #5.
17. Every house belongs to the oldest female living there.
Ah… OK now it makes sense. I overheard her talking to another lady about you at the grocery store the other day and she said, “Christ that Scylla! He’s such a tool!”
If you don’t refuse to not marry me, just signal that assent by failing to choose not to be nonresponsive to this post. And I mean that in a very real and legally binding sense. Particularly if you’re a babe.
She never gave me oral sex. I don’t think we’ve ever actually touched each other aside from maybe brushing against each other while getting up or something.
