I got my settlement check!

[Yllaria]

@Mtgman

. . . My portion?
$18.34

Enjoy,
Steven

Me, too. I was ordering Pratchett books from Amazon.co.uk when the new ones would be available there before they were available on the .com. At least that’s the only thing that I can remember that would apply.

@An_Gadai

I got a cheque for a cent one time from a domain name company.

I once got a form letter announcing that I had been evaluated for disability (odd story) and had been determined to be 0% disabled. I should expect checks for $0.00 to arrive monthly, although it would take six to eight weeks for the first one to come.

I waited. Never got a check. Posting the letter at work got me a few laughs, though.

[JSexton]

@Wheelz

I was recently notified that I am a member of a class action lawsuit against TicketMaster for excessive processing fees. If the suit is successful, I stand to be awarded $1.50 per ticket I’ve purchased from TM since 1999.

Hey, I’ve used TicketMaster quite a bit in the past 12 years. That might actually add up to a decent amount, right? Oh, wait. The number of awards possible for each customer is capped at 17. Therefore, the most I can possibly get is $25.50.

Still, 25 bucks is 25 bucks, so I shouldn’t complain. Oh, wait. I won’t get cash. I’ll get individual $1.50 TicketMaster credits via email (up to 17 of 'em, one per email).

Oh well. That’ll at least be enough for a free or nearly free ticket to a ball game or something. That’s cool, I suppose. Oh, wait. I can only combine up to 2 of the $1.50 discounts per transaction.

So, if I actually receive the maximum I possibly can get from a potential settlement, in order to use my awards I will have to make nine subsequent purchases – from the website I am suing! – to get eight $3.00 dicounts and one $1.50 discount. Yay, me.

Meanwhile, however, the proposed settlement seeks to recover “$16.5 million in attorneys’ fees”! I think I’m in the wrong line of work.

I got that one too. I’m pretty floored by it, really. I’m fairly sure Ticketmaster will end up profiting hugely by this settlement, since the only way to take advantage is by buying a ton of tickets from them.

The plaintiff’s lawyers didn’t bother even pretending to care, did they?

[Daylate]

Some years ago Germania Bank in Alton, Illinois went belly-up. As a result, a $20,000 bond became worthless.

About ten years later a letter came from a firm of Alton lawyers. In it was a check for $11,500. Quite an unexpected and most pleasant surprise.