Ambivalid loves your post. 
Hey, Buddy, no one wants to talk about you, okay? I only want to talk vaguely about me.
I’ve never heard this term before, but it’s perfect.
Just see Facebook for what it is, which is up to the individual user. The problem with Facebook starts when people begin taking it too seriously, whether it’s posters or readers. I really don’t give a shit what people do on FB anymore besides posting blatantly offensive alt-right (or even radical left) shit. If someone’s a drama queen/king on FB, I block them. I’ll friend them but I won’t be bothered with their annoying rants. But otherwise, we’re still good. The key to remember is this: YOUR facebook is YOUR facebook, and mine is mine.
Vaguebooking is dumb, but prodding the resistant vaguebookers to extract more information merely encourages them. When somebody does a cryptic sad post, just respond with a hearty “Sorry to hear it, hang in there!” and change the subject.
This way the people who were hoping for some generic supportive noises without explaining all the details get some generic supportive noises, and the coy teases who just wanted to provoke and then thwart their friends’ curiosity are frustrated in their manipulative little aim.
See, that’s what I was going to bring up. I don’t want to explain. I just feel bad. I also sometimes just tell friends directly that I feel bad and don’t want to talk about it. It’s also why the so-called “unspoken prayer request” exists.
If I thought the person was doing the second part of that paragraph that I didn’t quote, then they wouldn’t be friends much longer, even on Facebook. Who has time for manipulative shits?
The other day one of my FB friends went on a rant about vaguebooking, especially posts about “Oh, I’m in the ER now” without any other information. His rationale was If you’re in the ER then you should either not post at all or explain why you’re there so people won’t get all upset and worried about you.
Somebody else pointed out the whole “drama king/queen” protocol in such a post.
My friend was gobsmacked that people would actually behave as such on Facebook :smack: Then again he’s a somewhat naive type.
Ohhh, and then there’s the opposite of vaguebooking: TMI. This is when somebody who obviously needs A LOT of attention goes into excruciating detail about anything pyschological/medical. Sometimes it’s under a filter. Sometimes it’s not because they’re past “hiding” and want the whole world to know how “open” they are.
I think they missed the memo that Facebook isn’t exactly the venue for stuff like that.
nm
This thread once again validates my choice never to be on Facebook.
Say no more, sir!
We are so radical.
I stopped using Facebook today. Or maybe yesterday.
I’m more annoyed with the “Only my TRUE friends will copy and paste this as their status” bullshit.
Only my older relatives do this, and as far as I can tell no one ever actually copies and pastes anything and no one is ever unfriended, but even so, fuck you!
It’s manipulative to say sorry to hear that, hang in there? But it’s not manipulative to post vague updates designed to elicit sympathetic " oh no i hope everything is ok" posts ? And then refuse to clarify what’s wrong- without saying " i just wasn’t people to feel bad for me without explaining anything."
Or is it changing the subject that is manipulative? Because i can’t see that either. It’s failing to feed manipulation, sure.
Or or… are you saying that you wouldn’t be friends with coy teases that want to pull your sympathy strings and maybe make you worry without explaining what’s wrong?
Facebook seems to exist in my world for very few things:
-A few people, like my SIL, share EVERY detail of their lives. Everywhere they go, everything they do, etc
-for the propagation of memes and fake news
-for circular arguments, mostly over politics
-getting you into trouble with a current or prospective employer for posting something stupid or highly offensive because you’re too stupid to keep it from the public domain
I do wonder if vaguebookers do it in real life. Just walk up to a group of people and announce that they feel awful bit that they don’t want to talk about it.
The only content I ever post to FB are funny links I found in Fark, but the last time I did that was last year. Before that I was into LJ, but it led to me losing my job due to my online bitching. So my only venting is done here under relative anonymity.
IAN BigT and cannot speak for him/her, but I think that’s what was meant, since that was what I said in the second part of that paragraph that BigT quoted.
Who needs Facebook for that? You can witness and/or participate in all the troll feeding you can handle right here.