I have a new internet toy for you!

If you’re like me, this will ruin any chance of a productive day. I give you the Bonsai Story Generator. You give it chunks of text and it analyzes patterns in the chunks to come up with something that’s rather odd. It must be experienced to be understood. Sizable chunks (meaning a thousand words or so) are important. I recommend running this review of U2’s latest CD through the wringer. The results are … interesting.

To wit:

Mayo

I forgot to add my favorite:

Something about this seems quite profound to me.

Mayo

I’m just bumping this. Check it out!

I like this thing, but…I pasted something in and one sentence popped out that amused the hell out of me.

~Tasha

I gave it three news stores from the CBC and got back things like:

It’s like a turgid nightmare of conteporary politics.

I did a section of my travel blog:

:eek: Ow! I don’t remember that part!

I put in several selections of text from the straight dope and got this:

**I just respond, Sorry, not going to occupy your mind. **

I document poker games on my blog, though it’s by no means limited to that. Here’s what I got when I mix poker with other things:

I popped in the first page of Time Cube. I don’t really see much difference, but then again, Time Cube Guy is absolutely bonkers to begin with…

I am going to WikiQuote, & combining the quotes of Hunter S. Thompson & the old Batman TV show.

I’ll post the results later.

Or not.

Advice for Little Girls by Mark Twain

combined with

The Raven by Poe.

**TheFonz**I understand everything just fine, if not the details then the macroscopic view of it all. I understood it before I read what I have about ancient history, the crazy paintings with UFO’s, and before I realized our world was doomed. I made it to calculus, I don’t want to take any more mathematics courses because it is too rigid, and ruins the creativity of a person’s soul. I want to be able to think in colors and beautiful pictures, and maintain my mental flexibility. If you are the end result of years of mathematics and physics courses then you can definitely count me out. That is not progress. . . .Then everything gets colder and life ends. What if the Sun continues on as it is now? Then everything gets hotter and life still ends. It’s all about the balance of our energy fields.
meets the Bonsai Story GeneratorI understand everything just fine, if not the details then the macroscopic view of years of it all.
I understood it before I read what I made it before I read what I realized our world was doomed.
I have about ancient history, the creativity of years of mathematics and life ends.
What if the Sun continues on as it is now?
Then everything gets colder and life still ends.
It’s all I understood it is now?
Then everything gets colder and physics courses then you can definitely count me out.
That is now?
Then everything gets colder and ruins the Sun continues on as it is now?
Then everything gets hotter and ruins the details then the macroscopic view of years of mathematics and ruins the balance of years of a person’s soul.
I have about the balance of mathematics and life …

A few choice snippets from a blog entry I wrote about getting locked out of the house after dropping my mother off at work (original here because I can’t pass on a chance to pimp my blog).

Someone should do Homer’s mushroom trip…

(I’d like to but I’m busy starting another thread.)

I tried putting posts 1-9 back into the generator. Needless to say the results are strange.

I think the machine might also be trying its hand at writing scripts.

and lastly my three favorite lines.

Churchill’s “Blood, Sweat & Tears” Speech

and

The Opening of HG Wells’ War Of The Worlds.

Sounds like the Martian Prime Minister, rallying the Tripods for the invasion of Earth.

This (or something similar) was used for the infamous Chapter 34 of Atlanta Nights:

Combining lyrics from various Beatles, Cream, and Dr. Dre Songs yielded the following…

and finally…

The first few pages of a walkthrough for Final Fantasy VII mixed with the U.S. Constitution elicit these choice quotes;

And this, which makes little sense but I love the randomness of it.