I just met a woman who wasn't wearing makeup.

I attended a singles gathering this past Friday (I’m single) and met this very nice woman. We hit it off fantastically. We had some things in common, ie medical field, likes to play tennis. She is probably in her mid to late 30’s although I could be wrong. What attracted me to her was her figure. This lady had a figure that is comparable to Beyonce, I mean the right curves in the right places. Although it was a bit chilly out, we separated from the group and took a walk along this boardwalk. Neither of us had ever been to this location, so it was all new and fascinating. We must have walked together for 30 minutes if not longer. We went on a carnival ride (I got a little nauseous, but she handled it well), but just walked side by side talking about anything and everything most of the time. I didn’t make any moves on her because I didn’t want to ruin it.

We traded numbers and she mentioned on parting that she would love to meet again with me.

I’m thinking this new relationship probably has the potential for something big but…doesn’t God throw wrench in things sometimes?

Her face is very plain. I’m pretty sure she wasn’t wearing any makeup to speak of, and it showed. She looks like what Julia Roberts or Sara Jessica Parker might look like without makeup, and it probably adds 5-10 years to her face (or maybe not). I’m sure that if she used just some basic makeup, it would really transform her face.

Here’s my question. How can I broach this to her so as not to offend her? I would really love to continue this relationship and see where it goes.

Maybe if you wear makeup next time you see her it will give her a hint.

You can’t. You don’t get to start trying to change someone after one half-assed pseudo “date”. Deal with the absence of makeup on this otherwise fabulous woman, or find someone who better suits your needs in the area of personal grooming.

I’d say she doesn’t need makeup.

To the OP,

why mess up a potentially great thing with a silly question/request like that? Sounds like an episode of Seinfeld.

I agree. How would you take it if she said to you after your first date “oh hey, you know, I’d be more attracted to you if you dressed preppier/more gothic/had more piercings, etc. Could you do it so I’d see fireworks while I’m with you?”

Nuh uh. This is the phase where everything about her enchants you and makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside. If you’re already thinking “well only if she…” then you’re setting yourself up for failure.

If this is such a big deal to you, then move on because this can only end badly for the both of you.

So its “just deal with it” at this point?

OK, I guess that’s what I’ll have to do. Just wanted some input. Guizot, why the hate?

Runner Pat, Are you saying try to apply reverse psychology?

Either you like her or you don’t. A very good way to guarantee that you don’t see her again is to tell her she’d look better wearing makeup. Either move on from that - completely, not just keeping it to yourself but get it totally out of your head - or give up now on the relationship.

No, I meant my opinion is that she doesn’t need makeup.

Well, I’m not guizot, but I’d say that wasn’t “hate” so much as just a way of pointing out to you the silliness of your question. What, at this point, are you willing to change about yourself for her? If she said to you “Hey, you’d be much more attractive if you shaved your head” would you? Would you think it’s a reasonable request?

Yup. Typically, I don’t wear makeup, and if a guy suggested to me that I should after meeting him one time…or even after a few dates…he would be history.

“We are not loved because we are beautiful, but beautiful because we are loved.”

If you spend more time with her, and if you find that you really do like her and vice versa, then I would imagine she will become more attractive to you, with or without makeup.

No, it’s “just deal with it” forever. She knows about make up. For whatever reason, she doesn’t wear it. It’s not like you could possibly tell her anything she doesn’t know, and if you bring it up, then forever after, every time you look at her, she’ll see criticism.

I don’t even understand the root of the objection. Is is that you don’t like looking at her, and don’t want to keep looking at that face, so she needs to hide it? Or is it a philosophical one, “people have a responsibility to look their best”, and her deviation bothers you in principle?

What do you mean by “makeup”? What do you think needed covering up, or accented? I’d think a guy might appreciate WYSIWYG rather than being surprised in the morning.

Maybe her lipstick wore off, maybe her skin is sensitive to foundation, maybe she thinks eye shadow is whorish. Or maybe she just doesn’t know how to do it. Better “plain” than looking like a clown.

What about matching tattoos? Or piercings? There’s this really cool shop just down the street.

re: the OP. What they said. That’s something to mention if you’re really into crash and burn relationships.

I’m curious why her being completely natural in her look adds years. Wouldn’t it be the other way around; wouldn’t makeup take away years (provided its properly applied, blah, blah, blah)?

Seriously! Especially if she looks on par with Julia Roberts without it! Good God, man!

Well, in her case I think some makeup would take some years off, emphasizing her eyes and lips, de-emphasizing other things.

Well, she looks “coltish”, but maybe too much so. I meant Julia without makeup. Google “Celelbrities without makeup”.

But if the “other things” bother you enough that it’s a dealbreaker, the answer is to find someone who doesn’t have those “other things”, not to ask this woman to change for you.