There was an article recently published stating that a lot of people fake cell phone conversations to avoid talking to those around them, or to impress others. I’m curious - how many people here do this?
Aggh, guilty.
I was probably 18-19 yrs old and I was waiting to pick up a friend at about 4 in the morning.
I didn’t want to look like I was loitering and at the same time I wanted any other crazy people who might be up and waiting in an office building parking lot in a bad part of town to know that I had a communication device and WAS NOT AFRAID TO USE IT!
Yes, I felt like a complete dolt.
You should not feel like a dolt; that was probably a wise idea.
I don’t have a cell phone so I fake conversations with fake people. That seems to prevent people from talking to me.
I can honestly say I’ve never done that. I’d be too scared that hte phone would ring while I was “talking” on it.
I do text message people when I’m sitting around waiting on someone/something, just so it looks like I’m doing something.
I don’t have a mobile, but I did borrow my kid’s toy one a few years ago and have periodic conversations on it with a variety of invented clients in Geneva, Frankfurt and so forth.
“Okay, John, sell. No 20 million. No, as agreed.”
She thought it was hilarious. So did I actually.
Another classic association between title and username.
Who needs a phone to converse with oneself!
I answer imaginary calls sometimes, to get out of conversations with idiots. They think my phone is on vibrate, and let me walk away peaceably. 
Yikes. I heard an argument in a cafe last night. Except there was only one voice. I thought it was some insensitive person who didn’t have the good grace to take her heated cellphone conversation outside, but I looked up to discover it was an obviously disturbed woman shouting irate nonsense at the counter person, at another customer, and occasionally at people who were not there. Example, “You got a telephone in this place? No? How can you not have a telephone in this place with all of these books you got stacked up around here? What is wrong with this place?” I’m not proud to say I skeedaddled, but that’s what I did.
raz’s response reminds me of a story from Snopes. I’m surprised they don’t have a variation with the phone ringing. Maybe you could set the phone to silent mode, though. Then it wouldn’t be obvious to anyone (unless they were very close and could hear it vibe) that it was ringing.
I wasn’t talking to myself, I was using my phone’s voice-activated command system. 
(No, I’ve never faked a phone conversation. What’s the point?)
Years ago I set off my pager to get out of an insanely boring meeting. I set it off, took a look at it and said, “Sorry, it’s a client. I have to take this.”
Haj
The Onion recently had a good one on this subject: LINK
Yup, same here, although I don’t have a cellphone anymore.
** Trying to shake the mental image of **silenus ** getting imaginarily goosed **
From the OP’s link: ““I fake phone talk to get a point across,” said Ty Hammond, a student at Washington State University in Pullman, who once forced an apology from a woman spewing excessively personal details into her cell phone in an elevator by shouting (made-up) escapades of his own into his (powered-off) phone.”
I do that, too, except I don’t even use my cell phone. I just put my thumb to my ear and my pinky to my mouth and start talking, usually louder than normal. “Hey, what’s up? What are you doing? Uh huh. Me? Oh, I’m sitting in <insert location, be it a restaurant, waiting room, elevator, what have you> talking to you! Hehee!” My favorite is at a concert (usually Ozzfest) when I’m walking around outside, on my “phone” shouting, “YEAH, I’M AT THIS TOTALLY ROCKIN’ CONCERT AND I CAN’T EVEN REALLY HEAR YOU, BUT ISN’T IT GREAT THAT I HAVE A CELL PHONE?!?!”
It amuses me anyway.
Now that you mention it, whenever I’m in a group of say 4 people and the other 3 are talking on the phone, I can’t help but take my cell phone out and engage in fake conversation. Just for harmony’s sake.
Ive never done it, I hate talking on phones to begin with, why would I start making up conversations?!
A couple years ago, when phones were really starting to take off here (Ireland) a girl I was in school with was hanging out at a place where all the young people met up. Anyway she decided she was really cool because she was one of the first people to have a phone and walked passed lots of people having a fake conversation with herself. And yep, you guessed it, the phone rang!
Idiot… and she really was.
I’ve once or twice faked getting a call to get out of really, really dull conversations.
I also text, compulsively. I’ve got a plan of 500 messages a month for something like ten bucks, and was about a hundred messages over last month. I drive my parents insane at home, because I’m one of those Horribly Rude People who will have a ‘real’ conversation as I’m texting with someone else. Or if I’m on the bus. Or sitting at dinner. Or in class. Or walking to class. Or walking to work. Or…you get it.
I do this quite often to avoid conversations with people I don’t feel like talking to. Usually I’ll just put the phone to my ear and use a lot of "Yeah"s and "Mm-hmm"s. Occasionally I’ll say “No, it’s 63…63!”
This is why man invented Voice Mail. You just dial it, and have no fear of the phone ringing while engaging in your fake conversation.
Happy
I sometimes do it when I’m walking home late at night. I say a lot of things like “I’m almost home, just a few blocks to go.” so that anyone listening will know that I have a communication device and somebody is waiting for me to get home.