I’ve been into a couple of Sikh temples for wedding ceremonies and it is quite common to for guys who have their hair cut to cover their head with a bandana. You know the white ones or red ones or a scarf of some sort. I even think they have them for you to wear downstairs where you take your shoes off. I’ve never seen anyone wear a Jewish hat as a replacement. That seems strange to me unless you normally wear one.
Anyways Sikh weddings are cool to watch, very different.
When I visited a Sikh temple in India, they had a bunch of kerchief-like head scarves in a bin near the door. I just pinned one to my hair. I thought I looked ridiculous, but nobody seemed to mind.
Really, all you need is some reasonably decent looking piece of cloth and you should be OK. You don’t need a turban. In fact, trying to wear one will probably make you stand out even more.
Didja see his picture? He looks awfully sikhish already. If I were he, and wore a turban, I’d be afraid someone would ask me to lead a prayer or something!
I think perhaps he is saying, that if you are not accustomed to wearing such a thing often, it will show in little, but obvious ways to those that wear them often. 
I don’t mean this to be disrespectful at all, but I looked at the pictures of those Sikhs, and really, couldn’t you just use a towel? I achieve something very similar when I wrap up my long hair in a white towel after I wash it…
Just an idea…
Well, I had a very interesting time.
Any old piece of cloth would have been fine. About a third of the men there (Including all the priests, and those involved in the service itself) wore turbans. The priest himself was very traditionally dressed, in soft cotton trousers and tunic, a bright saffron turban, and bare feet. He was very kind and gracious, but he spoke only briefly to me, and only when I sought him out. His invitation to return felt more personal than evangelical. There were many pieces of differently colored cloth of various sizes in the lobby of the temple. My Hindu friends were there, and tied one on for me. The Yarmulke would not have been sufficient, but only because of its size. I doubt that anyone would have objected to the baseball cap, although it would have been the only one. There were some handkerchiefs, and one sweat shirt with a hood.
I was welcomed, and graciously treated by everyone I met. The “man who runs the computer” was not there last night, so the English translation was not included, as it usually is. (That’s a quote, and I really don’t know what that meant.) My friends were very busy, preparing and serving food, and there seems to be a vast and close social experience involved in the meeting. Most of the evening I spent with my very young former neighbor, a very bright and friendly eight year old. He became my guide, and helped me avoid being too conspicuous by my unfamiliarity. He is Hindu, not Sikh. We discussed the fact that although he did understand some of the verses and prayers, there were many he could not understand.
After the actual service, there was a very good meal served in the basement of the temple, everyone sitting on the floor, in long lines on carpets. I attracted a number of children, who joined me, and told me what I was being served, and discussed their favorites. Of course, outside of the service I was addressed in English, and everyone was quite friendly. On the whole, it was as kind and cordial as any Baptist meeting, and warmer than some I have attended.
The Sikh lady who invited me was her usual delightful self, although very busy with the cooking and serving, and it turns out that men and women sit on different sides of the temple, so there was less chance to speak with her than with the few men I knew in the congregation. (During the meal afterwards my time was nearly monopolized by the children. They found my appearance quite familiar. They didn’t think I looked Sikh. They were fairly sure I was Santa Claus.)
TrisLike Colibri I have visited Gurdwaras in India, and wearing a knottet kerchief was considered appropriate. Most places they hand out orange (or saffron) ones at the entrance. Since you are not Sikh it is probably even better than wearing a turban - there is a high risk that you will not be able to tie it in the right way, thus commiting one (or several) social faux-pas trying to pass for a real Sikh. Wearing the turban is intimately connected to the Sikh tradition of leaving hair and beard uncut, and is mostly for adults (married men). Younger Sikhs often wear a patka in stead of the pagri (turban). Different types of Sikh headwear here
And mnemosyne: the colour does mean something. It is not a social marker as is the turbans used in Rajasthan, but you have to choose the right colour for the occasion, like saffron for religious holidays, red on your wedding day, etc. In India I have seen young Sikhs wear camo-turbans and the like.
ETA; Too late :smack: . Glad you had an interesting time.
Turban color for Sikhs is often a fashion choice, because I’ve seen a variety of colors - usually something dark-colored (dark blue, maroon, black) that doesn’t clash with regular clothes, but that doesn’t limit the possibilities. Sure there are certain traditional colors for certain occasions, but for the everyday, there’s no real requirement.
This Sikh guy wants to jazz things up some more: http://www.ratemyturban.com 
Dang! - Some of those turbans are really cool. Better put on some Daler Mehndi and start rating.
Very interesting post, Tris! I’m sorry that I missed it before you went, though, cause I have a few questions for you. 
The link that you posted with pics of Sikh men - they appear to be the 3HO Sikhs, are they?! There is a fairly sizable community in the Herndon area and in Leesburg, maybe, I think. Also, did you find out what the celebration was? Was it Guru Gobind Singh’s birthday maybe? And I have to add that rather than Santa Claus, I thought that you -did- look like a Sikh, even though I couldn’t see how long your hair is in that picture of you. You certainly have the Sikh beard. 
Glad to hear that you had a good time. The meal served after gurudwara is called langar, btw–it is (I think) always part of the gurudwara service, offering free meal to anyone afterwards; the tradition was started by one of the early Gurus. Sikhism is a very interesting religion, being one of the younger ones. Even though men and women do tend to sit on different sides, I should add that one of the main tenets of Sikhism is equality of all, so there should be no gender differentiation, but most gurudwaras that I’ve been to (and it’s been many years since I’ve been), they do seem to do that and I’m really not sure why!
Again, thanks for sharing–very interesting!
This is because there is a rule in the Torah that says men are supposed to wear fringes on their garments at all times. Those fringes are found on prayer shawls worn by Jewish men (and some women) during prayer. Some Orthodox Jewish men wear fringed garments under their regular clothes as well.
The hair ringlets are called payot.
Well, I will admit openly that I found that picture by Google Image searching “Sikh Turban” and know nothing of the men pictured other than that they are Sikhs, and wear turbans.
I was unclear even after some explanation that this was the first service after the new year. No one mentioned anything about Guru Gobind. However, the entire service was in either Punjabi, or Hindi, and I don’t know which. (The man who runs the computer wasn’t there. ;))
My hair is currently down to the middle of my shoulder blades.
I had a very strong sense of community, and simple practical immediate charity as integral parts of that meal. I can see how strong an element of spiritual fellowship that could be in a country where famine, even when not present, is at least remembered.
It’s tradition!
Tris
It would have been in Punjabi.
It’s more of a cultural thing, really. I went to Catholic Mass in India once, and men and women sat on different sides there as well (AND we took off our shoes before entering the church).
Glad you had an enjoyable time.
Uh, well, ya know, tradition is sort of a cultural thing, mostly.
Tris
Really, this is quite an interesting (and educational :)) thread. Those were pictures of 3HO Sikhs (Sikh Dharma, Western Sikhs), that you found, btw, Tris, many converted to Sikhism back in the early 70s although now there are second and third generations, who would be considered born to the religion, I guess. It sounds, though, like you were at a (traditional) Indian Gurudwara. I see you found out why you needed to have un-holey socks too. 
I would really like to visit a Gurudwara again, but am afraid that I wouldn’t be able to sit cross legged, nor then be able to get up off of the floor! I wonder if they make any sort of accomodations for older folks who have the bad arthritis?!
I figured it was mostly tradition/culture behind the seating arrangement. It always seems strange to me, though, because it’s never been part of the culture I grew up in. If that makes sense.
Thanks again for being willing to share.
Thanks for the replies!
I’m not sure if my computer prof had a gartel, but that does sort of look like it. There were only a few scraggly looking strings on both sides, at his hips. I’ll have to count them next week, to see if there are four - perhaps it is the fringes from his shirt or an undergarment that just happened to have been sticking out? That would seem to fit too.
Actually, this article Tzitzit - Wikipedia has a picture of a person wearing jeans and a t-shirt, with the “strings” of a Tzitzit hanging down. That must be it.
As for the turbans - considering the variety I’ve seen, I had a feeling that it was a matter of choice, but I wasn’t sure. Very interesting to know. There was a man at my previous job who wore a turban of the most amazing blue I have ever seen. It was pretty impressive.
Is there a “graduation” age from patka to pagri, or is it determined by the length of hair that needs to be contained? I saw someone in Calgary with the patka “knot” nearly as large as his own head!
Tris - I guess I should have been more explicit, eh? 
What I meant was that these sorts of practices (men and women seated separately, shoes off in holy places) are part of Indian culture as a whole, and not specifically a Sikh tradition.
tarragon918 - If you have mobility issues, you wouldn’t need to sit on the floor. Someone would provide you with a chair to sit in, at the back or side of the room (so you wouldn’t block anyone’s view).
mnemosyne - There’s no special age at which boys start wearing the dastaar (pagri), though it’s usually only done on special occasions like weddings before they’re teenagers. As teens, boys tend to ease into wearing a turban by putting them more and more often for a variety of more formal events before switching to every-day wear. Patkas often are tied on underneath the turban to help keep the turban in place, btw - that’s the contrasting color bit you’ll see across the forehead. Patkas are worn alone by young boys, or by males of any age playing sports.
Here’s a great pic of Harbhajan Singh, a well-known Indian cricket player, as an example: http://www.indiadaily.org/images/harbhajan_singh.jpg
I can confirm that no one expects elders to be able to rise an kneel repeatedly. I was gestured to, obviously by several people as they noticed how long it took me to get up and kneel again to stay seated. My young guide offered to get me a chair when we first arrived. Several others of my generation were seated on chairs, as well. I’m just built to make myself trouble.
After the service, I sat on the floor again, but this time I had no need to rise, as the five or six children in my company virtually swarmed about getting anything I might need. The most common greeting I received was a request for whatever I might need. On the whole, they were a more polite, and gracious than the typical American Congregation. In the last five years I have become friends with a number of members of the Desi community in Northern Virginia. Uniformly I have been treated with kindness and afforded a dignity and respect beyond my general expectation. I would say treated by strangers, but it seems that moments after meeting anyone from India, I end up being at least an acquaintance, and when I see them again, a friend.
Also, it seems about half of them know my friend from work, and call her “Auntie Taj” with great affection. (One I share, I must say.)
Tris
Thank you so much for that information, Jean Grey, and Tris for adding on-the-spot confirmation. Maybe I will venture out to a Gurudwara…I will have to find a fitting (and nice!) head scarf before I do so, though! Tris hasn’t mentioned it, but the music, called Amrit Kirtan, or simply Kirtan, can be truly transcendent (these are sort of like hymns, from the Sikh Holy book, performed by musicians on harmoniums and tablas drums).
Man, I hate the word “yarmulke.” It should just be spelled “Yamaka.” I’ve never heard a single person actually pronounce it phonetically.
