Where do you buy ethnic head gear? (I doubt that both turbans and yarmulkes are going to be available at the same store.)
I am invited to a Sikh Temple this evening, and I need an appropriate head covering. Somehow, a baseball cap, or a do rag just don’t seem . . . respectful. So, I have to go out soon and get something. Will the local Jewish Community Center have a yarmulke I can buy? (I don’t feel real cool treating it like a . . . head shop.) I think I favor the yarmulke because I won’t need help getting it on my head.
Common Dopers, prove me right. I think you can get an answer to any question here.
According to the wikipedia entry on gurdwaras, a knotted handkerchief is acceptable. With the added bonus, I guess, that you can do Gumby impressions after you leave.
Might help if you tell us where you live. Here on the North Side of Chicago, or maybe just over the Skokie border, there are a dozen or more combo book/clothing/stuff stores where you can buy a yarmulke, from fancy to funny. Down on Devon are a slew of Indian/Pakistani stores - just stick your head into one, and if they don’t sell turbans, they’ll direct you to their brother/cousin/best friend’s shop who does. They’ll even teach you how to put it on, if my experience with buying sari is any indication.
Can you ask the person who invited you for a recommendation?
Well, since Sikhs who wear turbans make a point of covering their hair completely, a yarmulke isn’t going to make you kosher, so to speak.
Why don’t you ask the person who invited you what THEY think would be appropriate for you to wear? Since I’m guessing you don’t otherwise look Punjabi, I suspect you’ll be given some leeway.
Since the yarmulke only covers a small portion of the head, it may not be appropriate for this purpose. Most online resources indicate that a turban or kerchief are the correct choices.
The person who invited me said “oh, just a handkerchief” Which I can do, but . . . well it feels to me that an attempt to use something more appropriate is in order, since this lady is a very good friend. (And, by the way, as kind and generous and loving as any Christian I know.)
Also, yeah, I think a yarmulke is more respectful than a do rag, or beanie cap. I am not sure why, but it feels that way to me. A turban would be fine, if I can get it on in anything approaching the correct manner, but, there I will need help. A nice plain yarmulke would be better than sloppy turban. A handkerchief would do, but if I can, I want to make the effort.
There is no Christian Church Headcover for Men equivalent, or I would wear that. Sikhs tend to respect other religious beliefs, and also seem to appreciate gestures of respect from non Sikhs with a heartwarming sincerity. (Well, the Sikhs I know do, at any rate.)
Oddly enough, aside from a personal invitation, I have no idea the reason for the event, although I know many people will be there.
But the thing is, a yarmulke is NOT appropriate, because it doesn’t cover enough of your head. Follow what your lady friend said, and use a large handkerchief - you will be making the appropriate effort then.
Damn, those are some complicated head coverings. It looks like you’ll need a length of cloth 4 to 6 meters long and then Google “How to Tie a Turban” and there’s videos out there that show you. I don’t know if you really need to find a “turban” per se, maybe a visit to the fabric shop will work out better for you.
Ask your lady friend if she can help, or if not, if she has a male friend in the…uh…congregation?..that might be able to help you.
Don’t worry about looking sloppy! Yes, of course you want to look your best, but even the fact that you’re making the attempt will placate 99% of the people there. They’re just going to be happy that you’re attempting to respect their beliefs. 1% of the people, of course, are going to hate you no matter what, because there are always jerks in every crowd.
When I visited Bali, I was graciously taken to a local private temple ceremony. My husband and I were the only two white folks there. Our hosts (people who worked at the hotel we stayed at) took us to their home beforehand and played dress-up dolls with us. (Lucky for me, the woman’s sister was the only fat woman in Bali, so the lent me her lace shirt!) I know we still stuck out like sore thumbs, and yes, there were a few glares from Balinese people pissed off that tourists were in their temple. But mostly I got wonderful smiles and pats on the arm and a huge tolerance for all the faux pas I’m sure I unwittingly made. It was a fantastic experience, and I wouldn’t trade it for anything, even if walking in those tight wrapped sarongs was an exercise in clumsiness!
No, you just need to follow your friend’s advice and wear a handkerchief. Why are you making this so hard for yourself?
Not a few turban-wearing Sikhs will carefully take them off intact at the end of the day, precisely so that they don’t have to go through the correct wrapping process again in the morning. I take it uou have never put on a turban in your life. Why go through all the trouble of trying and then looking goofier than if you just wore the handkerchief?
Hello, nice to meet you. Obviously we have not met before.
I may well end up doing exactly that. Just a few moments ago another of the folks attending, (husband of a Hindu couple that I introduced to my Sikh friend) in fact told me that I don’t need a turban, and that he is not going to wear a turban. The gentleman assured me that the temple always has head scarves available at the entrance, and that it is more important to make sure my socks have no holes in them. :eek: :smack:
I frequently go to absurd lengths to accomplish minimal benefit. It’s just my nature.
So, no turban. Glad I found out about the yarmulke, though. Thanks for that information.
You know, it is kind of funny that you mention it. I just decided to wear long pants, for sure. (I generally wear shorts everywhere.) Of course, it is really cold today, so I might have worn long pants, but I am going to wear actual pants with a belt, not sweat pants.
Come to think of it, I will probably wear a shirt with a collar, too. This is turning into a complete formal thing.
This is going to be generally true of the vast majority of religious settings that allow non-members of their religion to visit and that require head coverings for some of them. If you go to a synagogue where men are expected to wear yarmulkes, for example, there will usually be a bin of yarmulkes outside the entrance for visitors to wear. It’s true even of places where you might not expect to see non-members of the religion. For example, at the Western Wall in Jerusalem, there is a bin of paper yarmulkes just outside the entrance to the men’s section (women are not expected to wear head coverings in the same way that men are in Judaism). They know that some Jews wear yarmulkes only when doing something explicitly religious.
If you wanted to buy a yarmulke, a Judaica shop is the place to look, and the place to look for a Judaica shop is in a neighborhood where lots of Jewish people live. I would imagine that Sikhs probably have an equivalent type of shop where you can buy books and stuff related to Sikhism, probably located in a neighborhood where a lot of Sikhs live.
Does anyone mind if I hijack with a quick question regarding turbans?
Does the colour of the turban matter at all, or is that a fashion choice, to try and match with the clothes the person is wearing? I mean, is there a significance to wearing a white turban rather than a blue or a yellow or a black one?
While I’m at it, I might as well ask if anyone knows if there is a reason why my Jewish computer professor had pieces of white string dangling from both sides of his belt? He was wearing jet black pants and white dress shirt with the black suit jacket and yarmulke, but didn’t have any of the hair ringlets (I’m sure there’s a term for those…!) - I imagine he’s either Hassidic or otherwise Orthodox? It just looked like regular string, hanging over a regular belt.
