take your punishment —and enjoy it!!
Sit at the show, and think how lucky you are to be “worrying” over a silly play.Next year this time, think of the things you’ll have to worry about!
think: “boyfriend”
“driver’s ed”
“Car”
“what if…”
take your punishment —and enjoy it!!
Sit at the show, and think how lucky you are to be “worrying” over a silly play.Next year this time, think of the things you’ll have to worry about!
think: “boyfriend”
“driver’s ed”
“Car”
“what if…”
In the meantime, enjoy being a great dad!!
I see now that it’s long after the event in question … so how did it go? Did you claw out your own eyeballs? No? Well, I guess it wasn’t so bad after all … 
I’ll bet he was so moved by the play, and proud of his daughter, that he took her and a bunch of her friends out to dinner. Maybe even a movie and miniature golfing.
See? Wasn’t it worth it?
Perhaps a floor-length hat.
I want to hear how it went! Having sat through more than my fair share of such plays, along with all kinds of other events (6th grade band concert comes to mind – sister whiterabbit and I about choked to death not laughing out loud at the truly appalling awfulness of the so-called music being masscred on the stage by Young Tiger’s band), I can safely say that the amusement factor is priceless. Plus the blackmail factor.
Take lots of pictures. To show her future boyfriends. That way, if she turns out to be a big Hollywood star, you can claim prescience. Otherwise, it’ll be good for lots of humiliation. 
Go, and videotape it. You might win $10,000!
So, how did the play go, or how many fingers you got left?
I always fall asleep during theatrical productions Leechboy is part of. Mind you I’ve usually had to sit through the rehersals and all the gumpf before hand so I’m all tuckered out by opening night. My arguement is that my mere presence should be enough.
Don’t keep us in suspense tell us did you go? Was it good?
So how did it go???/
find a dog, bring it to the play. they won’t let you in because of the dog. Tell daughter that you found a stray dog in the middle of the highway on the way to the play and you didn’t want it to get hit and they wouldn’t let you in because of the dog and its to hot to leave in the car so you can’t watch her play you got to find the stray dog its home
I think he is being held hostage by the Giggle Brigade.
Ha!
Maybe he’s just staying in that coma…
Or it’s a helluva wait in Accident and Emergency to get those severed fingers seen to.
Your excuse: Honey, Daddy’s at the emergency room. Why? Oh, it seems that the crack whore I normally get blowjobs from is in withdrawal, so while she was giving Daddy the highest quality hummer a man can get for his five dollars, she had a seizure and bit off Daddy’s wee wee.
Oh? Mommy wants to talk to me? Put her on…
Now that I have kids, I realize now what my parents went through when I was in school plays in such.
But you know what? You’re not doing it for you, you’re doing it for her. I do hope after the play you went up and asked for her autograph in front of her friends. A little embarrasment for the teenager is good for the soul.
Update:
The show was horrible. No, really. The camp was in several groups with age ranges from 7-18. Not all in one group. They were sorted by age.
We were first "entertained by the 7-9 year olds. Whoa nelly. There are few things more annoying than a bunch of brats forgettting thier lines and fighting over the one script that they were allowed to have on stage. One kid was so terrified that he didn’t say anything, didn’t move, just stood there shaking and looking like he was about to puke.
And Lo, there did come the 10-13 year olds, and they were mediocre, but not horrible. Except for the one girl who kept picking her nose.
The the 14+ kids come on stage.
My duaghter, who I love completely, was so nervous that sehrecitedherlinesmuchlikethissentenceinavoicesolowthatshecouldbarelybeheard.
But I was a good dad. I told her she was great. Then I took her out for Thai food and ice cream afterwards.
Good daddy. Take one gold star. Nah, two, you took her to dinner after.
I’m so disappointed. No lost digits.
I was SOOOO hanging out for some chopped fingers mate. You’ve shortchanged us. Piker.
I had a really great excuse for you. But I was away from the computer when your call went out. I blame myself. Actually I blame the plumber that never showed up. But it was a great excuse. Would have gotten you out of the play PLUS got you major sympathy points. But since you don’t need it now, I won’t bore you with the details.