My daughter has been going to acting camp all week on campus where I work. At 1:00 today they’re putting on a play.
Imagine the scene:
30+ adolescents (mostly girls, all of them infected with the giggle disease) putting on a crappy play, and unless I come up with a good excuse, I’ll have to go watch it.
So far the only thing I’ve come up with is cutting off my finger.
You are doomed. Accept your fate like a man.
Any friends in the area? get a hold of one early (while welbywife isn’t around) and have him call you in public and say his car broke down and needs a lift.
Or throw yourself from the roof.
Just because you go doesn’t mean you have to watch. Sit in your seat pretending to pay attention while, really, you’re finding your happy place.
Escapism–it works for me.
Oh for goodness sakes, go to the play! They’re always a hoot, whether good or bad. If nothing else, you’ll get a thread out of it.
Yes, I’ve sat thru more than my share of dance recitals, piano recitals, gymnastics meets, softball games, concerts, swim meets, and plays. It’s one of them things parents do. Even in the worst of them, you find a nugget of talent that makes it all worthwhile - sometimes that nugget is your own kid!
Two words: explosive diarreah.
[sub]Ha! I beat lieu to it![/sub]
Fake a coma. Make it last.
You’ve had all week to think up an excuse. You knew this was coming. You’re the one who sent her to camp in the first place, right!?
Take your medicine and plan ahead next time.
Tell your daughter that YOU want to be in it. Nothing makes things uncool faster than when mom and dad get involved.
Acutally, no. The girl is sneaky. She didn’t tell me about it until this morning. Even sneakier: She didn’t tell me about it at first, she asked me what I was doing around 1:00. To which I, like a total fool, answered “No real plans, I’ll just be at work.”
ARRGH!
Hire someone who looks simialr to you to go watch it for you. Make them wear a hat so noone will notice. A very LARGE hat.
Go to the play!
Your daughter is a future broadway star!
Bring a HUGE bouquet of flowers to throw on the stage as she takes a bow.
(think very naughty thoughts about all the other teen-age girls during the show)
Just go. You’ be bored, yeah, and possibly annoyed, but it’ll mean a lot for your daughter.
However, if you have work that needs to get done at work, that’s a reasonable reason, as you were not given notice. Ask her to next time tell you before the day of the play. If she’s an adolescent, she should know better.
You know, my dad almost never went to my shit when I was a kid.
Now that I’m an adult, I’m still pissed off about it.
Go see your daughter in her stupid play.
She knows you well. We girls learn these tricks early. 
Can’t you claim your chest is still to sore to wear a shirt? Or too itchy to sit still? No? You could try claiming explosive diarrhea, as JuanitaTech suggested.
Or you could remember that teenage girls’ egos are especially fragile, and their daddy’s approval is very important to them and their future relationships with men.
But I wouldn’t want to make you feel guilty, or anything. 
I can see the therapy bills now…
Seriously, go. It won’t hurt much, and it’ll mean everything to her. How many chances do you have left to be your daughter’s hero?
Clever lass, your daughter. I missed a lot of years (9-14) with my daughter and would love the chance to have some of those days back. I would gladly suffer through that play. Lucky you!
Tell them your pink eye could be catching.
That’s pink now, not red.
You are so hosed. Now suck it up and take your lumps.
I gotta agree with all those saying suck it up and go. It’s probably the most important thing in the world to her right now, and you don’t want to miss those things. Besides, if she screws up or does something embarassing, you’ll have great stories to tell her boyfriends in the future.