You have all the symptoms of stress, which you probably know. You can address the thing causing your stress (your job and commute) or you can start trying to manage your stress in other ways (exercise, me time, meditation, mindfulness, meds, getting enough sleep, proper diet). Your job itself probably won’t change, so the change has to come from you.
You sound a lot like my husband. He is Type A Man (not be be confused with Powdered Toast Man, although the inflection should be the same) and he must do all things with maximum efficiency. He’s also a bit OCD; needs to get out the measuring tape every time we move the furniture so he can make sure it’s precisely centered. Last week, he was showing me how when you go through a door, it swings slightly behind you, but if you do it just right the door will stay parallel to the wall. (To his credit, he did hear the crazy as soon as it came out of his mouth).
Exercise and wine do seem to help!
Also, I’m sorry about your dog.
Make sure you get wholegrains, and when cooking pasta leave it al dente instead of barely-solid. It will slow down the absorption.
I actually do stress-relief things quite a lot. I get massages monthly, use the hot tub when the outside temp isn’t roasting, get to bed at a reasonable time (pretty much when I get sleepy, around 10pm) and try to eat properly. Oh, and recently enrolled in a once a week yoga class. The one remaining thing I can add is some regular exercise.
Or is it possible that I’m surrounded by idiots? 
Clowns to the left of me, jokers to the right, etc.
Thanks for the condolences. It was more horrible than you can imagine. Lots of people have given me condolences and I feel humbled and grateful for that.
I do sound like your husband. I love efficiency. I sometimes wonder if it came from when I worked in fast food in college because that’s when I learned how to work as fast as possible, as correctly as possible. I do make mistakes, but I fix them just as quickly. And I have arguments with my husband over whether the hypotenuse of a triangle is shorter than the other two legs put together. (In practical terms, we both get out of the car to go into a building; he will walk to the end of the row of cars and then turn, while I will walk through the cars straight to the building.) They’re light-hearted arguments though, not divorce-fodder.
http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=19512657&postcount=1
Maybe you’re beginning to see yourself as others see you.
You don’t have to take shit from people, but that doesn’t mean you have to give them shit instead.
I don’t give anybody shit. It’s mostly inside my head, which is how it’s annoying myself.
Either you rule your emotions, or they WILL rule you. And every aspect of your life stands to be negatively impacted.
Just curious, when was the last moment you bordered on harshly judging someone who troublingly cannot seem to control their; food intake, gossiping, drug use, lateness, boozing, etc, etc?
Perhaps letting your anger run your mouth is your addiction? And maybe YOU need to grow a spine and exert some freaking self control over that. Not unlike we often feel others ought to do!
Because being harsh and angry wth our words is always a choice. ALWAYS.
Something to think about anyway.
It’s not just our conscious thought involved; there is also brain chemistry and everyone’s is different. You cannot control your brain chemistry with thought. There is a very good depression thread that discussed this very thing recently.
For years, I thought I was just a bad person who could not control her anger or impulse to criticize. Then I did some reading on how nutrition affects emotions, changed my diet and started taking some nutritional supplements that affect brain chemistry and I became a different person. I noticed it, loved ones noticed it.
Again, from your other thread:
You were very tense and wanted to be feared.
I call that giving them shit.
Gonna sound strange & weird:
You mind is in or is your brain.
Your brain is stuck behind the strongest bone on your body.
It has no hands, feet, etc. It can not do a thing in the real world.
Sit on the floor with your hands under your butt and absolutely refuse to move no matter what your brain says.
See, stupid isn’t it…? But wait… did not you just decide to get up and yet there you sit because you refused to move. Just going to sit no matter what the brain says… remember?
Now I went to work and every time something went wrong, people dun me wrong song or the world or my boss screwed me over… I laughed. ( sounded like a nasty growl and huffing but it was a heh, heh, heh said with a snarl. )
Every time.
In a week I noticed I was actually laughing.
After a month I was really belly laughing…
Co-works were aghast. “Why are you laughing, you just got really screwed over???”
It all no longer hurt, bothered or meant any stress for me. Freedom.
Short version: I can not think myself into right acting but I can act myself into right thinking.
For me for example, I still stress about taking a trip. Have I got everything I might possibly need? etc…
Now, I join the third person me on the side watching me stress and having fun watching. I actually enjoy stressing now it is so much fun to watch. And miracle of miracles, it is all in my head and I am a cool dude to those around me.
Like they are saying up thread, it is not an internal fix, it is external, stuff you can grab with your hands and change.
So change.