I used to get pains in my legs at night when I was little. My dad told me they were growing pains. So I assumed that I was growing an inch a night. It wasn’t until I was in fifth grade and could do more math that I realized that if that were true, I’d be 56 feet tall!!!
I used to believe that when they killed someone on TV they’d gotton the actor from off Death Row.
I used to believe that to make a woman pregnant you urinated inside of her. Glad we got that one straightened out.
I am sooooooo stupid.
I used to think tv ads saying “90 days - same as cash” were saying “90 days famous cash.” I thought it was a special deal for movie stars or something.
This one is sort of surreal…I assumed couples had kids as a hobby or something, but when you were married to someone it was a sort of business arrangement or you were paired up by the government or something. (In other words being married to someone and having kids with someone were totally unrelated.) When I was around 5 I had the following bizarre discussion with my dad:
“Dad, I’ve given it a lot of thought and decided when I grow up I’m going to marry you.” *
“Well, honey, I’m afraid I’m already married.”
“Really? To who?”
“Well, your mom!”
“wow, what a coincidence!”
*Yes, yes. I know. sigh
I used to think the mail man’s name was “mail came”, since everytime he’d deliver the mail, my mom would say, “mail came”. I was sooooo cute.
… that all it took to get pregnant was to spread your legs when a man was around. Nudity or actual contact were not necessary. I kept my knees together until I was 10. Then I slipped up one time and wasn’t careful with the proper placement of my legs… and I spent the next year thinking I was pregnant.
I also thought eating raw potatoes would give you worms.
I used to believe that germs came from Germany. Also, I had that same “Dukes of Hazard in the classroom” experience with The Wall.
Me too!!!
I also thought that juvenile delinquents was another way of saying: missing children.
HA!!! I sang it as “Land where the Pilgrims died”.
To be honest with you, I think I still thought that. I mean, I havent sang it since I was a wee lass, but if you asked me to sing it today I would surely sing of the pilgrim’s demise.
I thought all babies were born via C-section while their mothers were unconscious. Of course, I didn’t call it a C-section. I think I may have gotten this notion from a soap opera.
/Ms Cyros
When I was a child, I believed that kissing caused pregnancy, and that if you squeezed a tomato, ketchup came out of it.
I used to think that the Easter Bunny was the Trix Rabbit.
Also, I used to think the word “school” was just another word for grapes. (This was when I was really really young).
This just goes to show how warped the area I grew up in is: I believed that there were four religions in the world: Jewish, Buddhist, Catholic, and Christian. I was about ten before I put together that Catholocism was a sect of Christianity, and there are a hell of a lot more Christians in the world than Jews.
When I was really little, I somehow thought that if everyone turned off their radio or TV at the same time, no one would be able to watch TV/listen to the radio again, because if they were all turned off, all the programs would disappear. I slept with my radio on for years because of this.
Ok, I’ll play…
When I was a kid I believed that skyscrapers were the jets that left clouds of smoke behind them. They were so named because they “scraped the sky”.
Yes, I grew up in a small town, why do you ask?
Each of my daughters declared they were going to marry me when they grew up when they were each right around age 4.
I just remembered one. When I was 3 or 4 I thought Kindergarten was an actual garden, and I imagined I would be out pulling weeds, hoeing rows and picking carrots with the other “kindergardeners” when I was old enough to go. I decided I didn’t want to go.
As a child, I thought coffee was alcoholic. (adults drank both; except for my Baptist family where noone did)
I also thought that the word Embarrassed was etymologically connected to “bare-assed.”
I thought California’s second-biggest city was called “Sandy Ego” (note, this was decades before the appearance of Eggo frozen waffles).
Similarly, a former coworker of mine grew up in La Canada, CA, and told me that when she was little she thought it was “Lock A Nyada”.
I used to think that you got taller every year on your birthday. Until my parents told me that if that were true, my grandparents would be as tall as a house.
I also used to think that Tom Petty was a green wallet.
You know, “Now I’m greeeeeen! A greeeen wall-et!”
When we were 11, two of my friends told me that to make a baby, the man has to lay on top of the woman for 12 hours. :eek: So when we played Barbies, we put them in the missionary position for a few minutes, but there was no moving them around–they were just…there.
I once thought that a conductor’s baton controlled what tune the musicians were playing, not just the tempo etc. Too much Bugs Bunny, I guess.
KISS sang “Hot Blooded”.
I thought you got pregnant by swimming in a pond with tadpoles in it.
Later, I too thought pregnancy occured when a boy peed inside you.
It wasn’t until I saw a diagram on the inside of a tampon box, that I realised women had a little hidden “pee hole”. I thought it just came out of the vaginal opening… I was 16. :rolleyes: