I was shopping in Wal-Mart this weekend (Christmas is coming! I’m getting desperate!) when there was an announcement on the PA system, “Someone’s mommy has gotten lost! Will Mia’s mommy please come to the customer service desk?” I was stunned when the lady next to me put down the CD she’d been looking at, mumbled, “Oh, Mia…”, and strolled toward the front of the store. It’s a damn good thing Mia knows what to do when Mommy gets lost, since Mommy wasn’t even aware Mia was gone. And the CDs are a good long way from the customer service desk, so Mia’d been gone for a while.
I also hate seeing people lose their tempers with kids who’ve obviously been pushed beyond their limits. I’m always tempted to step in and help, but of course that wouldn’t work out. I just hope the parents aren’t that stupid all the time.
Calm down, now. Maybe this isn’t as bad as it sounds. Maybe “Mia” is 14 and forgot what time Mom said she’d “meet her back at the photo counter”. Or maybe “Mia” is 6 and when she got to the customer service desk, the store rep introduced her to “Mr. Social Worker” who will explain to her how she’ll be able to pick up her “little darling” just as soon as the Judge is satisfied that she has learned how to be a parent.
Yeah, yeah I know. Whole other can o’ worms and all that. Just a “perfect world” fantasy. It’s over now.
Here’s another kid-phenomenon we could do without: Kids tearing through stores on those damn skate-shoes. One was zipping around the pharmacy and up and down the aisles at Sav-On the other night. He was quite the liability. I pit the person who invented those damned wheeled things.
Oh don’t get me started on the parents who over do it. I usually saw one of two extremes-Junior would be climbing the walls while Mommy simpered, “Sweetpea, don’t do that, mmmkay?” or the nice, normal kid would simply turn his head for a second and all of a sudden mom would just grab him and beat the shit out of him.
I remember once when I was in high school and working at a local grocery store. We had these little mini brooms that were on sale that all the kids liked to play with. I’d stop it if I could. They were also displayed near a stack of styrofoam coolers. Now, these coolers were being knocked down at LEAST ten times per day. So when I saw a kid (about 8 or 9) go to play with the brooms, I just shook my head at him, he nodded, and put it back, then bumped into the coolers.
And they go tumbling ALL OVER THE PLACE. So I’m just finishing with his father, and as this happened, I started to laugh and say, “Oh, it’s okay, that happens all the-” the guy just goes apeshit. He starts screaming at the kid, saying, “I’M GONNA TAKE YOU HOME AND BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF YOU WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU DOING!!!” Poor kid looked terrified. I handed Dad back his change and then went over to help the kid clean up. I whispered to him that it was okay, that EVERYONE had been knocking them over, and it wasn’t a big deal. Kid gives me this uber-grateful look.
Last I saw, dad was yanking him out of the store by his arm, still threatening him while the other customers were just shaking their heads. Jesus.
One problem seems to be the perception that speaking to a minor consitutes discipline. If the person unwrapping the drumsticks happened to be 33, the OP would tell him to knock it off and no one would call it discipline. Loud, disruptive patrons who happen to be all grown up are told to put a cork in it or leave the premises and no one gets all outraged about people sticking their noses into anyone else’s business. Why do we feel we have to walk on eggshells around kids who are being destructive? I’m not talking about the wiggly toddler or the 8 year-old who talks too loudly with food in his mouth…these are the sorts of things we expect to put up with from people of all ages whenever we venture into public places. But the child who runs through a restaurant knocking plates and glasses off tables should get a word from his fellow diners.
Maybe I’m getting crotchety, but I have no problem calling stranger kids on outrageous behavior. Kids, not their parents. I don’t run to find mommy, I tell the kid to knock it off, take it outside, pick up your trash, or whatever else I would have said to an adult who was acting inappropriately.
The only time I ever had a run-in with a parent over it was while standing in line for a ride at a fair. Two pre-adolescent princes tried to cut the line in front of me, and when I told them that the line started ‘back there’ their mother (standing right there!) puffed up and told me that if I had anything to say to her kids that I should say it to her. So I told her to put less energy into her self-important outrage and more into teaching her spawn some fucking manners. The 3 of them just sort of slithered away.
At water theme park yesterday (Yay! Holiday!) and was in line going up this artificial mountain behind this mother, grandmother and 2 children. Child starts picking at hole in the artificial Mountain veneer foam. What does mother do? Start picking at it too!
Yes, that’s shoeing your son a great respect for public property. He’ll be slashing public bus seats in no time!
Good point. The funny thing is, some adults will act all indignant when youi make a reasonable request as well. No smkling in the building but guys feel free to have snuff and their disgusting spit cup with them. I think we should ask them to take it outside. Food and drink outside too please. People can’t seem to walk around for 20 minutes without their dam water bottle or come in and walk around with an ice cream or some shit.
The worst is playing on very exspensive gear. At the least I would expect anyone to ask before they pull down a 1000 dollar instrument. “May I try that?” If you’re not really shopping for anything then please don’t be offended if we limit the time you can just frig with our stuff.
I’ve had several people get all offended when I ask them to please not play an exspensive instrument.
For a store it’s trying to strike the balance. We want people to browse and feel good about the store in hopes they might come back when they are really looking to buy, but we need to prevent instrument damage which cost money, and prevent unnessecary loud jammin’ which can disturb real customers.
My mom is the manager of a pet store. She has a sign on the door that says, “Pets Welcome! Children Must Be On A Leash.” Cracks me up every time I see it.
The one that disturbed me the most was this little kid in Sears who was being fiercely yelled at by his mother or aunt in LOUD spanish. I understand a little Spanish, and the gist of it was - the kid had to go pee, had waited to ask until the last minute, and had to go that very minute.
Lady, can’t you yell at him afterward? Poor kid, he’s going to feel ten times worse when he pees all over the floor.
We went to a restaurant for lunch with our then-4-month old. She usually slept through meals, but that time she was starting to fuss. I then did something very strange for Hawaii:
I picked her up and took her outside until she settled down.
I think some of the patrons were surprised I didn’t just leave her in the seat while she cried. After all, that’s what everyone else does out here. >:(
Boy, I remember that, too. My brothers and I were raised by my grandparents. When I was 13 I told my grandmother to shut up once, and then all I remember is literally seeing stars. Unbeknownst to me, my grandfather was right behind me, and his attitude was that she might be my grandmother, but she was also his wife, dammit, and no one talked to his wife like that.
I’m not saying you ever have to hit your kids, but I never told my grandmother to shut up again.
After we were divorced my teenage son {who has grown up into a fabulous adult} went through a period of being very mouthy and disrespectful to his Mom. I encouraged her to smack him hard one time but she couldn’t bring herself to do it. He forgot which parent he was with once and got lippy with me but all it took was the look on my face and his whole tone changed immediately.
That’s how a relationship develops with consitancy. even though kids will fight it and act all pissed, they really do realize it’s love, and they feel more secure in that kind of atmosphere. They also learn to be aware of the people they are around rather than just themselves.
I’ve seen parents get all indignant and afraid when I talk babytalk to their little one at the grocery store. “Oh, the 100 lb woman who’s being nice to my child might HARM HIM! Ooooooooooo!” They’re the same ones that will be shooting the shit with the deli lady while their child is trying to stand up in the cart. I’ve actually caught a falling child and got the glare because I touched the kid. No wonder this country is so fucked up. A generation of fucking bubble babies.
Apropos of very little, this reminds me of an incident last Summer.
My GF and I were at our favorite restaurant. I’ve often seen kids there, but hardly ever disruptive. My guess is they’re there for the food just like their parents, and they don’t want to ruin a good thing. But there was one kid who disrupted pretty much half of the place. Not because he was noisy. Nor rude. Quite the contrary, he was perhaps the most well-mannered child I’ve ever encountered. No, his crime was that he was cute. Oh, and it was his 10th birthday. How did he disrupt the place? Every single woman there – and I include the waitresses – stopped what she was doing and lusted after this kid. Yes, lusted. They didn’t make any attempt to hide it, either. Pure, unabashed pederasty. And the father had a look on his face that said “That’s my boy.” It was really all quite disgusting.
My older sister is severly autistic, and my parents worked very hard from the beginning to teach her manners. Mostly she is very well behaved and knows how to shake hands when meeting people and she knows how to sit with her hands in her lap when waiting for food. It can be taught.
