I walk my beagles in the park every day, summer, winter no matter. Last week, the park workers finally opened the bathrooms . They have huge brick buildings that sit locked until they get around to opening the doors and putting in toilet paper.
So somebody in the park crapped behind a tree in the park. My dogs found it. They thought it was some really good shit and started to eat it. I pulled them away as fast as I could but it was not quick enough. YUCK.
The johns should have been open more than a month ago. Damn the dogs reek. I am tempted to pour mouth wash down their doggy food holes.
When the weather breaks, open the fucking johns. is that so hard to do? The yard they work from is about 500 yards away from the damn shitter. They could walk there and open the doors in 5 minutes.
So the dogshit they normally eat doesn’t smell quite so shitty?
The park bathrooms around here are open roughly Memorial Day to Labor Day. When budgets get tight, paying people to maintain park bathrooms usually winds up pretty low on the list.
Must’ve been a bear. Or maybe the Pope.
It is a well know that both shit in the woods.
Had to be the Pope, the bears use TP. Saw it in a documentary sponsored by Charmin.
Were there little pieces of TP scattered around?
Or the Koch Brothers looking to piss of gonzomax just a little more.
, There is a 250 dollar fine for doggy dumping unless you pick it up. Wonder what th e fine would be for the guy who crapped in the woods?
If the fine is 250, when Nordberg eats one, who should I send the bill for 250 to? The park commission ,the mayors office, the police department?
Geezus, why does understanding every gonzo post have to be like doing a word scramble? “When Nordberg eats one?” I can’t tell if he’s talking about his dog eating human shit or if he is making a veiled threat about someone shooting OJ Simpson.
Probably no fine at all for human dumping.
As George Carlin once famously observed, “There’s a $50 fine for spitting on the New York subway… but vomiting is free.”
I propose that whenever the topic of eating shit comes up here on the SDMB we refer to it as “pulling a Nordberg”
How do you know it’s human shit?
Did you call HazMat?
A friend of mine had his car stolen. It was recovered not far from where it was taken, with a steaming pile on the front bench seat. My friend refused to take the car (the cops suggested he take it to be detailed). Nobody would clean out the pile of shit.
Proper protocol was followed. A hazmat team came out and removed the seat, hauling it away with them for disposal. Insurance covered everything minus deductible.
It included paper used for wiping. It was in back of a tree off the beaten path.
Seems like it would be more appropriate to pit the person who took a shit on the ground in a public park… But I guess you can assign blame wherever you choose.
The park staff did not open the bathrooms . He could have walked to those if they bothered to do their jobs and open then before June. The worker yard is a golf shot away.