Hey remember, I’m the same guy who got thrown out of a strip club in vegas (because I fell asleep). Much like Pee Wee in Pee Wee’s Big Adventure, I’m a loner, a rebel.
Anyhow, since you asked, I was coming home from playing soccer, and the only pair of socks I had with me was super-dirty and sweaty, so I was barefoot, but, since I had just played soccer, I had a mighty thrist for gatorade, enough to push me to such a brazen and callous act.
Big Fucking Deal. I’ve seen your feet. They look like you’re wearing a pair of mud-drenched brogans. Frankly, if it was my 7-11, I’d make you wear hazardous waste gloves. Toilet paper ain’t that expensive, ya now?
Edit: ya know?
After 6 hours of dealing poker, I was on a break table and asked the waitress to make me a coffee, I was exhausted.
Unfortunately, I got busted and hauled into the bosses office, where I was severely reprimanded and told I looked “rough.” I was given 30 minutes to “get myself together” otherwise I would be sent home.
No, seriously, I just needed a break. Five minutes! Get these compulsive gambling bastards bitching about how much money they have lost OF THEIR OWN CHOICE away from me long enough to get some caffeine in my system.
I’m so glad I’m not the 20 year old he hired to drop his fiance for, who he dropped his wife for. However, I really wish he would keep his hormones in check in work related issues and not take it out on people who aren’t dumb enough to screw him, drink with him, or golf with him.
Yeah, I could take it to personnel except the head of personnel was busted getting a blowjob from an employee.
Welcome to the wide world of gambling.
Clearly the employee wasn’t doing it right if s/he busted the head. Ouch!
Um…Nick? Is that you?
You sound like one of my old roomies. You know, with the…anti-Yankee stuff…and…“Derek”.
Clearly, the reciever of said blowjob was rather pent up, if the force of his spunk forced the giver to smack her dome on the table.
Maybe it WAS done right.
I’ve been on a rampage this morning already.
I failed to signal a lane change.
I swung one lane too wide when I made a right turn.
Finally, outlaw that I am – I pressed the “Pay Outside - Credit” button on the self-service gas pump, but then went INSIDE and paid with a DEBIT card!
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
And, I’ve had a soda perched right next to my keyboard all morning. Yeah, baby, I am taking it to the EXTREME!
Pantywaists, all of you. The other day, I returned a video to the rental place.
Without rewinding it first. 
“Hangings too good for him, burnings too good for him. Rip him up into little bitty pieces and bury him alive!”
Or maybe
“Butt stuff!”
If you really feel you have to drive 80 down the wrong side of an expressway, well ya gotta do what ya gotta do.
If you have an irresistable urge to unleash germ warfare in a heavily populated area, I’ll understand.
But, by Og, there are some rules you DO NOT BREAK! We live in a society!
Yeah, well, I not only messed with the laws of man, but may have messed with mother nature, as well…
I planted my garlic crop 3 days before the recommended planting date! How’s that for daring???
I tread amongst thieves, scalawags and scofflaws! :eek:
Just one more reason why I love this place.
Baby, if I could find you hotter than I already did, this would have done it.
In a act of consumer disobedience, I ripped the tag off my pillow.
Rewinding? What’s the rewinding thingie of which you speak?? 
My big thrill? Um…I took a 1 hour and 3 minute lunch. I had nothing but chocolates and coke for lunch.
I can’t believe that’s the best I could come up with.
Yeah, but you cut up dead people for a living. I’m thinking you may have different standards of “savage” than the rest of us.
“Open This End” my ass! I’ll open anywhere I damn well please.
I do love a rule-breaker–you bad boys are gettin’ me all hot and bothered.
I recorded the Tigers/Yankees game … without the express written consent of Major League Baseball!
I’m eating Easy Cheese directly from the can right now.