Wow, I am really surprised by the number of people who’ve chimed in as “don’t have friends, don’t want friends, don’t need friends.”
I wonder if this is representative mostly of forum participants or of life in general? Anyone?
My WAG would be that this board tends to have a crowd which leans toward more intellectual/cultural interests than the average group of people. On the whole, we seem to be avid readers who like to stay well-informed about current events and social issues. Reading is, by nature, a solitary persuit.
Secondly, we’re all a bunch of snobs who don’t suffer fools gladly, and a good 85% of the population are fools. 
I have tried the whole ‘make a bunch of friends’ route. I was wondering if making alot of friends actually made my life better. It didn’t. All I ended up with was about 15 casual aquantances with people who I didn’t have alot in common with and who I knew I couldn’t rely upon when things got bad. I guess just having 1-3 good friends you can rely on is all I really need. Some of the poeple I became friends with implied the same thing, even the one who seemed really social said that with all her aquaintances she only has 1-2 true friends.
So I’m guessing your wife is your confidant and closest friend. One is probably good. As for is it normal? I can only talk about my own parents life but neither of them has any friends. My dad has a couple of work friends, and my mom has no friends aside from her sisters who live in town. And even they aren’t that close.
I actually have no friends at all. Partially because of my sheltered upbringing, I don’t really know how to make them. When I was in college and graduate school, I did have a few friends, and even began dating at the age of 25, but I haven’t gone out with friends or even dated at all in about 5 years. It’s just me, alone. While I’d like friends, it seems that the tremendous effort (for me) would be too stressful on top of everything else in my life.
I guess reading other people’s words on the internet has replaced actual conversations for me. When I’m at work, of course, I’m all business and really focused on getting things done, so I don’t think that really helps me make friends. I don’t like to drink or care for sports, so that eliminates a lot of opportunities. I’ve come to terms with my life right now, but I guess I’m living in the closet in more ways than one. I would like to make changes. But I’m afraid that I’d become overwhelmed if I attempt to move out of my professional, comfort zone.
I think it’s representative of message board regulars as a whole, and is definitely something I’ve noticed on the SDMB (as well as other boards). I think that people who don’t enjoy social interaction are often drawn to the internet as a way to “stay connected” – it’s a way to have contact with other humans without the demands of face-to-face interaction. The internet can be both emotionless and anonymous for those who wish/need it to be so.
I couldn’t disagree more: One can be an avid reader with various intellectual and cultural pursuits and still enjoy being around other people and feel a need to be social. It happens all the time. You’re seeing cause where there is only coincidence: many people here are both avid readers and loners, but being an avid reader does not encourage loner-ism any more than being a loner encourages avid reading. 
Well, discounting family, in all honesty, I’ve only ever had two friends, neither of which I’m in contact with anymore. I’ve had and have many acquaintances, some very good ones, but the relationship is limited to the confines of whatever made us acquaintances to begin with.
I’m quite willing to blame myself for this. People tend to annoy me and I don’t have the patience for them. I don’t understand social people–those who seem so happy engaging in mindless and repetitive conversation with dozens of people a day. I find no joy in that.
When I do talk to people, even though I’m well aware the conversation is hollow and perfunctory, I still can’t seem to get over analyzing every word said looking for ulterior meanings and, as a result, my replies are always slow-coming and very guarded and I’m afraid I tend to come across as aloof.
And I don’t drink, and alcohol seems to be the lifeblood of social gatherings.
When I was younger and post-college, I always found myself as part of the “social” crowd at work – the group that got together for drinks and snark, for example, every Friday night. Several of us would do the random shopping trip or visit each other every so often. I was the only single. I actually got a kick out of meeting everyone’s family and pet.
Then I changed jobs. I started working what I call The Anti-Social Schedule, aka overnight. I did it for almost 10 years straight. Friends? What friends? <i>I need to take a nap!</i>
I still work it occasionally. But I digress.
Neither my husband nor I have friends within shouting distance. Most of his are halfway across the country. Most of the friends I’ve made within the past few years have been initially through messageboards/forums
We’re both loners by nature, although he’s much more socially adept than I am. By that I mean he has no qualms about striking up conversations and such with strangers and acquantainces. Me? I tend to sit back and wait for the lull in an already-established conversation shrug
Our spare time is spent taking care of my mother. There is nothing – and I mean nothing – as isloating as caregiving. I mean, if I had somebody to invite over for coffee, I’m not sure it’d be worth it because it’d depend on how Mom is doing that particular day. We can’t go anywhere without her because we don’t know anybody who’d watch her. Movies/shopping/whatever with other people? The logistics are such a nightmare that it’s easier to say no, but thank you anyway. The down side? After awhile people stop asking. That hurts, but I can’t blame them.
It’s a good thing Mr. Kiz and I are compatible, but yeah, I’d like to have more local friends. I just don’t see how it’s possible sigh
I think it probably is unusual. I don’t know anyone with no friends, apart from me.
My circle of acquaintances has been slowly but surely contracting over the years. I didn’t even notice at first but now the only people I have in my life are my husband and my sons, one of whom still lives at home. My sons are adult and making their own lives (of course) and my marriage is less than ideal so I really have no one. Fortunately, I enjoy reading.
Good point. 
If it weren’t for my wife introducing me to husbands of her friends, I’d probably have no friends except for “work friends”.
As it is, I count two close friends outside of work.
Bunches of aquaintances, of course, but I count a “friend” as “somebody you’d continue contact with if one of you were to move away”.
Yes…it’s pretty unusual to have zero friends.