Ok. The story so far. I have been unemployed for two weeks now and I’m not exactly in a panic because
I had been anticipating this for about 9 months, so we are secure for at least 6 month to come. Over the last 7 years or so the relationship has deteriorated to the point where we don’t even sleep in the same room, we argue a lot but somehow we have remained friends and neither of us seems to have the gumption to call it quits, because, well, I guess we still love each other. We further do not wish mess up our son who seems to be taking all this in stride. My wife thinks it’s the end of the world. Also she cant seem to handle me being around the house all day. So there is some new tension in the air.
Sooooo, last night she gives me a 1.5 liter bottle of common water (like sparklett’s), it was sealed and written on it is what looks like 009A and my name, she has one too that has “009” and her name. She gave me the bottle before going off to bed saying “This is Holey water”. I said “huh? Like it was blessed by a priest?” She said no, it was a “spiritual thing” – uh-huh – I am to pour a full glass before going to bed but only drink half, then when I get up, I am to drink the other half. She is to do the same. “Why” I said, she said “Because your being a pest about everything!” So I said “Did you pay some kind of spiritualist for this? (That would make me unhappy because she has always refused to go to legitimate counseling with me). She denied paying for the advice. She would not elaborate what this was supposed to do, or where she had gotten the plan, or how this ritual would somehow help our situation.
So my question is: Has anyone here ever heard of this ritual (or some kind of variation)? What’s with the numbers? Any Idea what this is supposed to do? Why the secrecy? I should also note that we are in Brazil, land of “Macumba” which is a sort of Brazilian flavored Voo-Doo (the roots are the same as the Caribbean). I have long since shorn any belief in things “New Age”, but I also do not believe that some ones deeply held religious ideas are subject to skeptical debate, however she is Catholic, and this is clearly NOT a catholic thing (that I know of). At any rate the bottles were factory sealed, and I am well aware of the placebo effect. If she thinks it will help, well, what the heck, its only water. Having a glass of water before bed is a small price to pay in order to keep the peace. I just wonder if this a simple thing, or an indicator of things to come. I hope I don’t find little blond doll under her pillow with pins sticking out of it’s eyes!
My wife is Brazilian, and though she doesn’t like macumba, she is into “espiritualismo” and some of the less wacky new age stuff, but in the typical Brazilian way. This is of course after being baptized, etc. in the Roman Catholic church. My MIL is also Catholic, but my wife said there was a long time where she regularly went to to the local macumbeiro. Her sister seems to be the one in the family who beleives in all the wackier macumba. She spends a lot of time washing the doors with ammonia, placing garlic and lemons in strategic places, and so on.
I must say I find the Brazilian attitude towards religion fascinating. It is almost as if most people are saying and thinking: “Of course, it’s just wacky superstition and unfounded beliefs, but we might as well cover all the bases, and make sure we don’t offend any Gods that might really be out there.” This seems to be their attitude to most of the established religions also. The City where my wife comes from (Belem), has a week long festival in October, which basically celebrates some kids finding a statue of Maria in the woods. There is a huge procession, with some people going the whole distance on their hands and knees, or just their knees. Every year there are some deaths due to exhaustion, trampling, etc., but the whole city is out there following that old statue down the street every year. I wonder what some of the Catholics from the US or Europe would think of this. Even the “semana santa” in Spain is mild compared to this.
The following translation of an old joke will best illustrate this:
Zé went around town saying that he did not believe in macumba, and that his patron saint would protect him, always showing everyone his little statue of the saint, which he kept in his breast pocket. He said “Let them do their macumba on me. My patron saint will protect me!” One day an old man overheard him saying this in the local store and finishing his cachaça, the old man said: “Your patron saint will protect you alright, but only as long as she is close to you, so watch out!” The religious man left the store feeling safe, but yet a little unsure. When he came home, he decided to take a bath, and as soon as he took of his shirt, he started losing coordination, dropping everything on the ground, tripping over everything, etc.
The next morning when the shop keeper opened, Zé was already waiting outside the door, and told the shop keeper to get the old macumbeiro. After explaining everything to the macumbeiro, the old man mumbled something under his breath and said all would be fine now. Now, when people ask Zé if he believes in macumba, he answers: “Weeeeeel, I don’t really believe in it, but I don’t push my luck either.”
To answer the dilemma of your post, I don’t think you should start worrying that your wife is trying to poison you just yet. It is probably some harmless “potion”, that is supposed to rekindle the love/passion. Also, don’t start looking for dolls, because that’s not the way macumba works. However, if you start noticing your clothes disappearing, locks of hair being removed from your comb, and a sudden shortage of live chickens in the neighborhood, THEN you can start worrying.
I’d go sleep with her.
She obviously wants to save your marriage if she is willing to go out and buy magic bottled water to help it.
Mrs. Z and I had a tough patch a while back and finally something I did made a world of difference.
I went to a doctor about my snoreing.
I snored so loud that we didn’t sleep in the same room. I snored so much that really neither of us were getting a good nights sleep. (even though I thought I was.) Sleep deprivation lead to, being cranky, and doing stupid things.
Now I don’t snore and we really sleep together and our marriage is better.
My advice is to find out what is really harming your marriage and then FIX IT!
She wants it to get better. She wants it to get better tonight.
Pardon the hijack, but how did the doctor treat your penchant for late-night wood sawing? I’ve read about treatments, but have never run into anybody who’s done it.
I dated a Panamanian bruja(that would be witch for those of you who don’t speak Spanish) for several years. Among the many things she taught me was confirmation of what I’d gleaned through books, web sites and the like- Voodoun, Santeria and the rest are for many people not opposed to Catholicism but an essential part of it. A botanica has candles for invoking the aid of Chango right next to candles for invoking Jesus, Mary, or one of the saints. My guess is that for her this is a Catholic thing and that she went to a shaman who deals with angels and saints rather than Orishas or Loa.
I agree with other posters that the stuff is likely some love potion. Whether you believe in such things or not, I urge you to drink it. Your wife is saying that she hopes the two of you can heal your marriage. Drinking the water according to her directions will tell her that hope for the same thing.
Hi all who responded: sorry about the lack of response…
To hijack my own thread…
** Mycroft Holmes ** wrote…
I see this in many ways here, that’s why I mentioned it as a veriable in her behavior. When it comes to things religious, or occult, or celebrations for that matter, Brazilian’s don’t fool around – Carnival here makes Mardi Gras in New Orleans look like a pot luck dinner in comparison. As for “Macumba” I have seen some displays that would have we Americans calling the police as well as the ASPCA. I was walking down a main Ave. one night and came across a full on * feast * lain out for some spirit or another. Complete with a severed bulls head, hoofs and fore legs next to the head, all around were plates of prepared food for about 15 people, open bottles of * pinga *, Scotch, wine and beer everywhere and desserts, all interspersed with black candles. Very weird thing to come across when your strolling down the equivalent of, say, Wilshire Blvd. Later on I learned that one of the men who was a partner in the construction project at the site had gotten screwed on a the deal. This was supposedly calling down revenge on the other partner. Work stopped at the site for months and months because none of the workers would enter the property after that. Don’t bother calling the authorities to clean it up either, they wont touch it *no one will *. these things are a health hazard, they smell for blocks as they rot away and draw swarms of flys as wells as wild dogs. Not good. Living on a street that has an intersection at the bottom in a relatively wooded area, I see offerings all the time from flowers with wine and cigarettes, simple bread and water, dead animals (mostly chickens). Depending on the color of the candles and the placement of the stuff, it tells you if the intent is bad or good. One very disturbing – Lots of black candles, candy, soda pop, cookies, small dolls, little toy trinkets and fake jewelry. A “macumbeiro” that I know told me this was especially evil as someone was trying to bring harm to a child. Perhaps someone was hoping to hurt the child of their enemy. I walked down the other side of the street until that one washed away.
** Zebra ** wrote…
Here it comes… Get a towel ready.
(It seems strange posting all this personal info but maybe it will be therapeutic to blab, so here goes.)
She wont put up with that, at least not un-announced or otherwise a mutual idea (meaning hers). Also, neither of us snore. We used to keep extremely different hours due to work, She would get woken up when I came in and never really get a good nights sleep, then she would wake me up when the day began and I would never be quite straight. This is how we became accustomed to keeping different quarters. We had a good long talk the other night and it turns out she is sick and very scared. She has a big lump in her breast. No biopsy or mammo yet because she wants to make sure the insurance situation is a go first (remember I just lost my job). In the last year we had some real serious trauma. Our son fell through a plate glass window and almost lost his foot, that same weekend our very beloved Labrador Retriever was bitten by a spider (or something) and died. Our son was inconsolable when he got out of the hospital and blamed us. A lightning strike where I work caused a bunch of key (expensive) equipment to fry – getting all that stuff fixed wiped out the companies financial reserves and ultimately caused my lay off (they are sitll fighting the insurance company over that and it will be some time before it is resolved). I had taken to hanging out with the boys almost every night – she hated that and was convinced I was seeing someone else – ( I was not, and have since cut that shit out). So you can see there has been lots of worry this last year. She feels that she has been internalizing all this stuff and it has manifested it self in the form of this medical condition. Her cousin has managed to convince her that some one has put the Mo-Jo on our house and perhaps it would be a good thing to cleans ourselves of it. So now she has us drinking Voo-Doo water. What other hocus -Pokus is going on besides the water? I will go along with the program if it will make her happy and keep my skeptical opinions to myself, but I just cant bring myself to believe a string of bad luck was caused by some unforeseen force walking around out there that means to do us harm. To me that’s not religion, that’s just bad mental health. Lets not forget the last 15 years of good luck, love, health and good fortune. I see this as a rough spot. I think that is what is pissing her off, I’m not in a panic and she is.
** Rilchiam ** wrote…
Yes, of coarse. And you know, it tasted just like…water. All is well except for this new eye on my forehead, oh yeah, I now have horns and a tail too!
** DocCathode ** wrote…
Yes, I believe this as well. That’s why I’m doing as she asked.
I was just a bit weirded out because this something far and away different then she would normally do.
