I had a substitute teacher in one of my classes today and I was sitting at my desk not feeling like myself. I ate some leftover pizza at my buddy’s house this morning, I think that is what made me sick.
I was trying to wait for class to be over but it seemed like every 1 minute was worth 3 minutes so I raised my hand so I could be excused and the sub kept saying “I will get to you later”.
I felt sick but I didn’t know I was going to throw up but I wanted to get some air because the classroom seemed unusually stuffy. I finally got up without asking and began walking out of the room and Mr. Substitute Teacher gets in front of me and says “This isn’t a University where you can come and go as you please” and as soon as he said that I just heaved all over him. I vomited on his chest and his shoes and after that I was so embarassed I just walked past him and went to the restroom. After I had thrown up on him the whole class was cheering like some 2nd graders and also from what I hear after I left the room everybody STARTed throwing paper at him.
Anyway I went into the restroom and the Health Clerk knocks on the door and asks if I’m ok and then I get taken to the office because the the Health Clerk doesn’t think I should drive home right away and the whole time I am in there students keep coming by congratulating me, telling me how great what I did was and saying to me how much that particular substitute deserved it because he was a “pussy”. I swear I did not plan to vomit on anybody. Things spread very fast because I had people congratulating me that were not even in that class.
All I have to say is that this throwing up on the teacher thing was not planned so I could get props from the whole school but it feels nice.
You know, fifty years from now, at your class reunion, someone will probably still remember that, and say, “Hey! Remember how you threw up on the teacher? that was so cool!”
Face it, this is what you are going to be famous for. I find it hilarious, because the teacher did sound like a jerk. I don’t approve that the rest of the class threw paper at him however. Yours was an accident, their actions were deliberate.
Hey, guess what; he’s now aware that there are exceptions where you DO let students come and go as they please. Betcha he never ever blocks a student leaving the room again.
Best story of the week, definitely. There have been some teachers I would’ve liked to chorf on (accidentally…yeah, that’s the ticket), but I’ve never been lucky enough.
As a substitute teacher, I’d just like to say that your sub probably deserved it. It’s really not that hard to tell when a kid is ill, and if they’re ill and moving for an exit, you stay out of their way. Anything else is just a power play, and it makes the kids hate you (more).
Heh, your story reminds me of a guy I knew in high school who poured a bottle of water on his crotch to give a sub the impression that her refusing to let him leave made him wet his pants. It was hilarious. But I think your anecdote is better.
BTW, having to ask to go to the bathroom is one of the things I miss LEAST about elementary through high school. I remember there was a foreign exchange student who thought that was one of the most ridiculous things about American schools, and I agree. It’s not discipline; it’s a prison camp torture technique. (And it’s not like it prepares you for the real world, unless you have either a really strenuous job or a jackass for a boss.)
I find it hilarious, because the teacher did sound like a jerk. I don’t approve that the rest of the class threw paper at him however. Yours was an accident, their actions were deliberate.