I’m a former road rager. I used to tailgate, invite my fellow drivers to engage in sexual acts with inanimate objects, following people that pissed me off. I’ve been able to relax and mellow out without getting myself or someone else seriously injured or killed. I have a few pieces of advice on how to deal with aggessive drivers. Some of this advice may be hard to swallow, and go against your natural desire to make the person pay somehow, but you have a better chance of staying alive, safe, and in a decent mood.
If someone is tailgating you, change lanes. If you are on a one lane road, pull to the side of the road. Just let him pass. Slowing down will only aggravate him. Which makes him angrier, which makes him more likely to do something dangerous. He’s angry. He’s not going to think “Oh, you got me, heh heh.” He’s gonna think “Why you asshole.” Don’t hit your brakes. He may hit you. Yes, his insurance will pay for the damage. But you may injure yourself or someone you love. The insurance ain’t worth it. And your car will never operate quite as well again, and he won’t be responsible for the future damage. Don’t forget the hassle of having to get the quotes on repairs, waiting for parts to come in, having a friend drive you around. He may have to pay for your hospital bills, but you are still in the hospital. Will it have been worth it then?
Don’t make eye contact. Of any sort. Don’t look at them, shake your head, or anything. Don’t acknowledge their existence as they pass you. They are in a highly agitated state and anything can be viewed as an escalation. Especially if you end up at a stop light. Let him yell. If your windows are rolled up, and your door locked, you’ll be okay. Stare straight ahead.
If someone is following you, do not stop. Keep driving. Drive around the block dozens of times. Drive to the police station. Don’t confront someone. Even if you are a big man, and the driver is an old woman. A security guard at your place of business won’t be able to do too much if someone starts beating on you.
When you are angry, find a way to let it go. It’ll eat you up inside. The amoount of effort involved in dealing with a jerk is not worth the payoff. That person will not change. The middle finger will not make him realize he was driving slow, or that he should hang up the phone. Just get away from him. Chances are, you are better than that.
When I was an aggressive driver, I was always stressed out. Driving was hard work. I was always miserable. It took me a long time to realize that I was putting myself in that situation. If there’s a slowpoke, I just drive slowly until it is safe to pass. If someone wants to get around me, I let them. I remain in a good mood, enjoying my music, and arrive at my destination in a pleasant mood. My scowl-quotient is much lower than it used to be.
I know some of this may seem counterintuitive. We often feel the need to respond, to get “justice.” This person probably feels wronged by you, don’t forget. Let him pass, and the whole unpleasant situation is over in 15 seconds, and you can smile when you see him pulled over a couple miles ahead. I know this, because it happened to me. Rather humiliating.
And this has what to do with me? Oh, implicating that I will rear end someone is fair, but until I actually do, all you can call me is annoying.
And if you read what I was replying to I said I get a rise out of people the same way impeders get a rise out of speeders. I only tailgate when I see a clear problem driver in front of me. I flash my lights (while over 100 feet away since I’ve seen first hand how some drivers react to my “agressive flashing”) and then approach to within 2 car lengths (which is tailgating, hell, if you do the math anything under 150 feet is tailgating apparently).
Now folks, please don’t think I’m some sort of crazy driver. I laugh at this sort of thing. I also laugh (rather loudly in my car) at most of the bad driver’s I see (including not being able to make a left turn, drive the speed limit, keeping right and signalling lane changes). I love shaking my head when I see my fellow drivers continue to make mistakes (sometimes all 4 all at once!).
I’m amused right now that both speeders (which I’m one of) and the slow = safe driver (many of you I guess) always argue about which is more right, keep traffic flowing, or play moving road block. (and please, doing less than the limit is indeed a road block).
I always leave for work very early (I give myself 1 hour) and I make it to work normally in 20 minutes. I do this not because I want to drive slowly, but because sometimes, just sometimes, I will get stuck behind a clueless driver and have to do something somewhat dangerous to pass or decide not to pass and stay on the road for another 20-30 minutes.
All I ask is that you keep to the right when not passing. I won’t comment on 2 lane highways because they’re very rare around here and so I cannot comment on it
badmana: Your recommended actions are not only dangerous, they’re illegal. Pull your head out and read that nifty little driver’s handbook you can get for free. And consider for a moment that the guy in front of you just might not be able to get over because some jackass besides you is blocking that avenue of escape from your dangerous and stupid driving. Your first step is to realize that you have a serious problem: aggressive and dangerous driving. Seek help before you get someone–even yourself–killed.
Hugh Jass: And if there’s no way to either get out of the way of morons like badmana, what to do? Certainly not speed up to what you consider a dangerous speed.
Well, I also called you an imbecile, so maybe I can do more than call you annoying.
I probably drive as fast as anyone in this thread when the road is clear, but endangering those around you doesn’t necessary go hand in hand with being in a hurry. That’s unique to people like you.
Lets see, my hand books states (but I can’t quote) that slower traffic keep right. That’s it. It doesn’t say “drivers at the limit stay left” or “stay left if you feel like it”.
This makes no sense. The guy in front can’t move over because there’s someone beside ME? You mean beside him right? And so how does that work? I piss someone off to change lanes (I guess) and so they get back at me by keeping up with me? Why didn’t they just increase speed?
And again with the threats of being killed. Not a very convincing argument really. I could be killed following every rule on the road and then some. Not getting killed isn’t what the law is for (other wise the speed limit would be set to 5 mph - no one would get killed).
I drive fast, I have never admited otherwise, I also don’t waste time behind people driving slow. I don’t personally make gestures or throw things or whatever (I’ve had slow people throw cups and stuff out their windows). All I do is move right, drop it to 3rd, pass, go back to the left lane or just sit in the right lane. Simple.
Not only can you not drive, you fool, you can’t read too well, either. I did not say “beside you” as in “someone alongside you.” I said “besides you” as in “another moron other than you.”
Where in that handbook does it recommend you pull those dangerous stunts you prefer? Where does it recommend you follow too closely (“tailgating”)? Where in that handbook does it recommend you attempt to cause an accident?
Sorry, I’m not into name calling, even in the pit, when I don’t see a need for it.
Before I go further into this with you, I want to ask, what is your idea of tailgating? 20 feet? 40? 150? Lets say for 65 mph.
That way we can get to the issue of the argument: is closing to 2 car lengths (my car is 10 feet long) is dangerous. I fully admit when I tailgate I close to within 20 feet.
And again, as archergal said, she’s not comfortable driving the limit on a clear day…does that include you? That way I’ll feel better calling you names.
Tailgating, obviously, is following the vehicle in front of you at such a close distance that you will not be able to avoid a collision with that vehicle in the event of an unexpected stop (you know, like when that driver follows your stupid recommendation).
Guys, before I leave (for the day) I just want to say, until you can prove that tailgating is say, most dangerous than any other illegal driving act, people will do it because it generally works. I tailgate, people tend to pull over or I get into a position to pass on the right.
I’ve gone on at length about the perceived “danger” of tailgating. Its way over blown which is why the police rarely ticket for it (I hate using that comparison because the police also ticket for speeding which is also a non-dangerous act in and by itself).
And because of my high-speed, non blocking driving I have NEVER, EVER been tailgated. I wonder why?
That’s cool monty. With that statement in mind, I have never tailgated in my life. Ever. You know why? Because in every instance I have been able to safely stop before hitting the car in front of me! Wow! Isn’t that crazy? I guess I’m not as agressive as I thought huh?
I take back all my statements about tailgating. I don’t do it because I can stop rather fast (my Matrix is noted for it’s stopping power).
No, badmana. You merely believe you can stop in time. Your stated intent in earlier posts in this thread is to intimidate and scarethe driver in front of you. Your intent is to cause that driver to believe that if he doesn’t get out of the way of the moron behind him, said moron (that’s you, btw) will likely crash into him.
Might want to reaconsider this practice, you never know when the “fucker” you pull this stunt on is in an unmarked patrol car. Yes, I’ve seen this sort of thing happen.
One afternoon, I was walking back to my desk after having bought lunch. I saw a slow-moving white sedan pull in front of another car. The driver of the second car decided they didn’t want to be going so slow so they sped around the sedan. Busted!
So we have someone who both tailgates (I’m not buying into the ‘I can stop’ bullshit[sup]*[/sup]) and intentionally jams on his breaks in front of another driver in effort to force them into a skid?
I’m beginning to think we may be arguing not with an extraordinary idiot, but with an ordinary troll. His next claims will be that he side swipes cyclists and sodomizes wounded animals on the side of the road.
*[sub] at 65mph you would cover the purported 20 feet in about .2 seconds. Stopping distance at this same speed is over 120 feet for a matrix. The car is over 14 feet long, btw, so 20 feet is much less than 2 car lengths.[/sub]
Hugh Jass, while I was never really a road rager, I used to get VERY frustrated in traffic. I pounded on my steering wheel till I decided that might not be such a good idea steering-wise. So I started pounding on my dashboard.
I cracked my dash doing that.
This was a 1974 Pontiac Ventura (no airbags), with the sort of padded dash, and the car was about 9 years old and maybe the plastic was brittle, but still…
I started re-thinking my attitude toward traffic and driving in general.
2 Seconds should be a minimum following distance. At 65Mph, that’s around 95 feet (unless I cocked up the math). In the wet you’d need closer to 3 seconds.
You gotta remember that the only thing you know about the front car is whether it’s brake lights are on or off, unless his tires are screeching you have no idea just how hard he’s braking. The human brain is very very poor at working out closing speeds when the object is moving directly at it.
Another reason to keep a reasonable following distance is that on a two lane highway you can see further because the car in front of you is not filling as much of your visual space, and you have some room to accelerate to a good overtaking speed when the time comes to pass, this minimises your time on the wrong side of the road.
2 seconds/3 seconds is what’s taught in defensive driver courses. These should be required for all new drivers and would settle many of the arguments here about how to impact other drivers’ actions on the road. (And it used to be that successful completion of such a course could lower your insurance–by a lot–with companies like State Farm. Not sure if that’s still true.)
Almost ALL accidents are avoidable. Think of that. All the wrecked cars, all the time spent getting estimates and other rides, all the hospital bills, all the permanent injuries, all the physical therapy, all the deaths–almost ALL of them are (or were) avoidable.
I read somewhere that 85% of people surveyed think they’re better drivers than average and nobody thinks their stupid driving habits will cause an accident, until they actually cause one. Badmana, I’m talking to you! You’ve been lucky so far. Now chill. You can still drive fast. (And yes, the people who box you in and slow you down are also guilty of bad driving. However, you’re only responsible for your own driving, not theirs.)
Anyone who has ever ridden a motorcycle would automatically, within a nanosecond, be able to recognise how inherently suicidal Badmana’s philosophies are.
Why’s the Boo Boo Foo? Strangely enough I have a motorbike license. Of course, while on a bike (or trailing a bike) I’m a different driver so I don’t see how this has anything to do with driving a car.
What stuck me as amusing yesterday was all the hate directed at me for my “tailgating” from all you “victims”. At least I get to continue to tell myself it still pisses enough people off that it works
Well, to be fair I direct a lot of ire towards poor drivers (hey look! another post about drivers who stop on ramps!) but I rarely get involved with road rage (as much as you guys might not believe). I just don’t look back, but the instances where I do get involved I tend to not hold back much.
How about a deal, anyone who drives “slow” (AKA not the flow of traffic) keep out of the left lane and I"ll not tailgate* you! See, I can be fair!
*figuring that I do not tailgate anyone in moderate traffic or already moving at an acceptable speed (generally 75 mph (120 km/h))
