I was searching for THIS and I found THAT...

Sometimes internet searches lead us to strange places. I recently had two amusing examples:

  1. I was searching for which Foghorn Leghorn cartoon he used a whole tree to make a baseball bat (“Henhouse Henery” btw.), and the results from a search for Foghorn Leghorn bat included a series a cartoons depicting Foghorn and Dawg as gay rapists attempting to overpower each other.

  2. I was searching for the name of a vaguely-recalled axe murderer movie which I didn’t find, but I did stumble upon “Axe Giant: The Wrath of Paul Bunyon”, a rather dark take on the popular folklore hero.

The Legend Of Lizzie Borden?

I was in a Maya class (3D modelling and animation) and we were each assigned a monster to develop. The instructor put monster names in a hat, and I drew the basilisk.

We next went to the internet to grab reference images. A basilisk is part hen and snake, so I did a search for “hen.” I got tentacle porn.

A classmate told me told me it was called “hentai.” Evidently hentai vastly outranks hen in searches.

So I Married an Axe Murderer?

If you’re searching for Merkin Concert Hall, make sure your search includes the words “concert hall.”

No, it was posted on the http://irememberthismovie.com/ site, as follows:

Similarly, if you ever want to research the tropical hardwood called ebony, you might instead find vast numbers of pictures of nude African-American women.

I believe things like that were why Google made moderate safe search the default for their search engine.

Searching for “pair of tits” returns page after page of cute tiny birds.

I posted this recently in the “worst things” thread, but I was looking for old Ford truck parts and got results for “Transvestite Midget Dog Fuckers”.

I’ll say it again: You can’t make this shit up.

I don’t remember how I got there, but I was not looking for images of Jesus on food, yet that is where I wound up.

A few years ago, my wife and a coworker were trying to remember the name of the company that made a line of bath products called “Dirty Girls”, which they had seen at a trade show. So they googled “dirty girls”… and you can probably guess how well that turned out.

I made my wife laugh awhile back. She wanted to know what the name of those “little” accordions were (concertinas). I told her “It’s a good thing I remembered the name- a Google search on ‘squeeze box’ would have been no help at all”.