I have noted a tendency of some mothers in Asia to scold their children in the following manner: “I went through so much pain to give birth to you, and now you are such an ungrateful child today”.
One common retort to this is, apparently, “I didn’t *ask *to be born - you were the one who decided to have me and give birth to me, I didn’t ask for it.”
Now, which argument is fairer? It’s true that childbirth is immense painful and a big sacrifice made on behalf of the child, but it’s true also that the child didn’t ask to be born, so it was an unsolicited favor/sacrifice. Is this a fair argument to use?
Are you familiar with the Christian concept of “Original Sin”? Well, what you’re referring to is the Jewish concept of “Original Guilt”, which seems to have crossed the oceans/continents and found root in Asia. Oh, and the “Original Smart Mouth Reply” which generally is followed by the “Original Potch on the Tuchus”.
It’s a sign of a bad relationship, that’s what it is.
A more positive reply would be: “Hey mom, please stop guilttripping because it puts me in a defensive mode.
Tell me what you really feel, and what you really want. I love you and want to help where I can.”
They’re kids. It’s their job. 
So we’ve located the lost tribes of Israel?
:rolleyes:
What you think only Jewish parents try to guilt trip their kids? That’s a strange position to take.
Relax. They’re just noting a well-known stereotype.
The Bible required you to stone your children to death if they were disobedient. But if we ignore God’s word on the subject, in the West, we’ve decided that humans aren’t property and we’ve decided that, once you’re 18, you’re free to do whatever you want. So any parent who goes into it with the idea that they’ve got a compliant, obedient minion is just being creepy.
In the East, they may not have gotten to that point yet. But it’s the path of humanism, so I assume that they’ll get there. Minus the ability to do things like the Bible suggests and kill a disobedient child, the only thing keeping them obedient is psychology and convincing them that they are meant to be compliant, obedient minions. Generally, it’s a pretty easy sell to convince people that, that’s a load of rubbish.
As they say, they’re their own person, who had no choice in the matter. No contract was signed. The gods have made no promise of obedience nor love. And, fundamentally, it’s the person who cares who’s problem it is. If the kid doesn’t care, and they can’t be stoned to death, that parent is just out of luck.
Most parents deserve to be treated well by their children. And there’s value in having connections and friendships with people, so children are generally going to try and keep the relationship alive. But the simple act of procreation isn’t a magical act for slavery. To some extent, if you want your children to like and obey you, you have to be worth it.
Nu?
A better reply would be, “Well Mom, if you had kept your legs crossed, this wouldn’t have happened.”
There are innumerable reasons for (most) children to be grateful to *both *parents, however the act of birthing them aint one of them. That line of thinking gets a big fat :rolleyes: from me. On the other hand the whole “I didn’t ask to be born” is an obnoxious, immature thing to so say so I’d say the manipulative bitch who would say the first and the insensitive smartass that would reply with the second deserve one another.
Heard in arguments involving the maternal side of my family, multiple times and involving multiple people:
“I gave you your life!”
“That doesn’t give you the right to fuck it up!”
Well, but aren’t children/teenagers kind of allowed to be obnoxious and immature? It’s in their nature. I tend to hold adults to a higher standard.
Never heard of it. I take it there is one on Jewish parents?
Mothers in particular. It’s a longstanding American meme.
You never text, you never Skype…
How many Jewish mothers does it take to change a light bulb?
That’s all right, don’t trouble yourself. I’ll just sit here in the dark.
As well as a mother that would guilt trip a child like that (I speak from experience), has a long history of doing other, equally manipulative things to their child. In that case, I’d think the kid has every right to be a smartass. It’s the former who has gotten what they deserve, while sadly, the latter hasn’t.
Despite the fact that it’s a Bill Cosby line, I always liked “I brought you into this world and I can take you out!”
My counter-argument would be: “Interesting take on parent-child dynamics. I’m sure Grandma and Grandpa will be fascinated to hear you feel like this.”
I always saw this as part and parcel of the Judeo-Christian mindset, a lot of which comes across as “I created the universe, now spend your life sucking up to me.” Of course, the same applies - who asked Him to?