I went to my first Purim tonight

As some of you may know, I’ve taken a strong interest in Judaism over the last year. Last year I undertook a medieval occult ritual loosely inspired by Kabbalah, part of which involved rigorous study of Jewish scriptures. I went into this as an atheist - I wasn’t doing it because I literally expected to unlock magical powers or a personal connection to God, but because I believed it would be a good way to learn about myself and to trigger a mystical experience that I hoped would give my life direction. I’m not entirely sure that I’m not still an atheist - at this point, I identify strongly with the teachings of R. Morcechai Kaplan, who interpreted God as being that which exists within us and inspires us to be the best possible versions of ourselves. I’m sort of a non-specific pantheist/agnostic of the “God is nothing, and therefore God is everything” POV these days.

Anyway, a large part of what came out of me performing that ritual was that I wanted to learn more about Judaism and potentially convert in the future. There are only two Jewish congregations in my area - a Chabad, which I know isn’t right for me, and a Reconstructionist temple, which REALLY speaks to my sensibilities. I’ve found great wisdom in the idea that tradition and ritual can have value even if you don’t believe the stories inspiring it are true, because one can still derive wisdom from those teachings, and because those kind of practices are what tie a civilization together and keep it going for hundreds and thousands of years.

Last fall I signed up for an Intro to Judaism class online. It’s administered by the rabbi of said local Reconstructionist temple, who chairs our state association of non-Orthodox rabbis, and has a rotating cast of rabbis from all around the state (but mostly Seattle) who’ve been teaching on a variety of topics. Despite being about two-thirds of the way through the class, however, I had not yet worked up the courage to actually set foot in the temple. I tend to be shy and introverted by nature, and I’m very uncomfortable in unfamiliar places where I don’t know what to expect. I had made plans previously to attend a Shabbat service a couple of times, but I chickened out. As it happened, however, I had tonight off of work, it was Erev Purim, and the temple was holding a Purim event. I figured that a casual, lighthearted event like Purim was the best opportunity I’d possibly have to dip my toe into the waters.

I was EXTREMELY nervous and afraid. I literally had a nightmare about attending the service last night. I spent most of the afternoon with butterflies in my stomach trying to calm my nerves. I went to the convenience store around the corner from my house and bought a box of Kraft Mac & Cheese, which the temple’s website recommended both as a donation to the county food bank and for use as a grogger. I took the bus downtown. I sat in the park around the corner from the temple for twenty minutes trying to work up the courage to walk over there. I walked down the block and across the street from the temple. I slowly walked down the sidewalk on the other side of the street, watching people walk in to see what they were doing so I wouldn’t seem out of place. I thought about turning around and going home. I made myself cross the street, walk into the parking lot, and towards the gate, where a greeter dressed as The Man In The Yellow Hat from the Curious George books was sitting.

“Hi! Happy Purim! You are here for Purim, right?”
“Yeah.”
“Pleased to meet you. I’m David.”
“I’m John. This is my first time here. I’m a student in Rabbi Seth’s class online.”
“Welcome! Let me walk you in. I’ll introduce you.”

He introduced me to a few people and helped me find a seat in the conference room (not the main sanctuary) where the event was being held. I explained that I was a student, that I wasn’t in a conversion process but was considering it in the future, and that I just wanted to watch and follow along and learn. There were long tables set out cafeteria-style, with a lectern at one end of the room. I actually recognized one person there, who works the self-checkout at a grocery store I sometimes stop at on my days off. There were plates of homemade hamantaschen sitting out on the table, with numerous fillings - the traditional poppyseeds, a prune+walnut mix, lemon curd, raspberry jam, and Nutella. They also served cheese pizza from a local pizzeria, which the rabbi would jokingly explain counts as a traditional Jewish food because if you fold it up just right it looks like hamantaschen. I didn’t wear a costume, but there were some great ones on display - one teenager who’s apparently a bit of a chemistry nerd dressed up as the chemical diagram of an ester for the sake of the pun, and I wound up sitting across from a guy who was dressed as Wayne Campbell from Wayne’s World, complete with the hat and mullet.

The rabbi himself was dressed up as Pete Hegseth, with faux tattoo sleeves, a pair of kettle bells, a flag tie, and a large nametag with “Department of ̶D̶e̶f̶e̶n̶s̶e̶ War” written on it. Before the Megillah reading got underway, he gave a brief sermon in which he said that celebrating Purim is an act of resistance against authoritarianism and patriarchy, comparing Haman to Trump and Hegseth and Stephen Miller and urging us to shake our groggers at their names. (I DEFINITELY made the right choice in finding a congregation that’s politically aligned with my own sensibilities.)

For the most part, the Megillah reading was in English, from an abbreviated version written for a general audience. The rabbi took volunteers from the congregation to read each chapter. I would’ve loved to participate, but I’m not Jewish yet - for now, I’m solely there to watch and follow along and learn. For the sixth chapter, the rabbi called up one of their cantors, who read the chapter first in Hebrew in full cantillation, followed by the simplified English version. This was the first time I’ve gotten to see Hebrew cantillation live and it was very impressive and elicited a round of applause from the congregation. The rabbi mentioned that next year he’d like to be able to do the full Megillah in both Hebrew and English, and that they’re having signups for anyone who wants to learn how to cantillate. The cantor was also the one who baked the hamantaschen with the help of the kids from the congregation, and he announced that he had used his late mother’s recipe, which he’s been baking for the temple for 30 years now, and he had copies of it if anybody wanted one. I made sure to pick one up.

There were a couple pauses during the reading. For the first, the rabbi invited the children of the congregation onstage to tell jokes. It was very simple kid jokes, as you can imagine, but it was fun to see them perform, and there was one kid who did an absolutely stellar performance of the “Orange you glad I didn’t say banana again?” chestnut. For the second, the rabbi asked the audience to shout out words for a Mad Libs sermon he would be giving later. At the end of the story, the rabbi declared that, in his alter ego as Pete Hegseth, he’d had a change of heart and crossed out the “War” on his nametag to change it to “Department of Peace”. After the conclusion of the Megillah, he gave that sermon - a humorous account of how the Israelites had been wandering in Brooklyn for 6-7 years and had taken to wearing mixed fabrics, which angered God so much that he sent vicious giraffes to lay waste to them until they agreed that during Sukkot they would build condos and sacrifice elephants while singing ‘The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald’.

For the finale of the evening’s events, they set up some pinatas and invited people to take a whack at them. One for the kids, one for the adults. The adult who took the last swing at their pinata hit it so hard that it broke off the string, flew across the room, and landed directly IN MY LAP with the baggies of candy spilling out all over. I can’t help but think that that’s some kind of sign that I didn’t choose wrongly in deciding to attend this event.

I’m glad I attended. I’ve been putting this off for too long. I’m glad I chose such a festive and lighthearted event for my first experience. I’m less frightened now about attending an actual Shabbat service, which I’m going to try to do in the next week or two. I went ahead and bought a ticket for the community Seder the temple is holding next month. I’ve wanted to attend a Seder since long before I became interested in actually becoming Jewish, and I’m very excited about this next step.

Just wanted to share.

I have read the Book of Esther. It is interesting enough historical fiction, but— please correct me if I am wrong— there is no mention at all of God or mysticism.

That is correct. It is generally understood these days that the book of Esther is fictional, and that it’s a Judaicized version of a Babylonian New Year festival in which Marduk and Ishtar (I.e. Mordechai and Esther) cast lots (I.e. purim) to decide the fate of mortals in the coming year. It’s also the only book of the Bible - Jewish or Christian - which does not mention God at all. The ancient Jews probably adopted Babylonian New Year customs during the exile and over time adapted the legends behind them into the version we have today.

As I said in my OP, the fact that the story probably isn’t true doesn’t invalidate the traditions that have evolved around it, and the rabbi made a good point in comparing Esther and Mordecai’s struggle to the current struggle against fascism in our country today. In Esther 4:13-14, Mordechai tells Esther; “Do not think that because you are in the king’s house you alone of all the Jews will escape. For if you remain silent at this time, relief and deliverance for the Jews will arise from another place, but you and your father’s family will perish." This is a reminder that it is EVERYONE’S responsibility to speak out against injustice, even if you think it won’t affect you personally, because if bad comes to worse then being wealthy or privileged isn’t going to help you.

This is interesting. It gives you a sense of purpose?

I’m glad you went and had fun, and it sounds like this should make the next event you want to attend much more approachable.

I am happy you had the courage to participate.

Sounds like you found an interesting group.

I have always wanted to experience attending Jewish services but there aren’t any close to my area.
I called a few places in Virginia where my cousins live but I have not had the time to set up an actual visit. I am still hopeful I can eventually pull something together.

IIRC, the Song of Songs doesn’t either? (I just read both, in Robert Alter’s annotated translation. Highly recommended; his focus is on the Bible as literature, so really gives you a sense of the differences in writing style between the different books, explains all the wordplay, and doesn’t try to play down the ambiguity and the sheer strangeness of it all.)

In religion, there seem to be two interesting strands: ritual and revelation.

Some people have a direct personal spiritual experience.

Others find that a formal system and routine helps them make sense of the world.

One can somewhat lead to another of course: if you consciously decide to be polite and respectful to others, you will probably internalize it over time. And probably be a happier person.

Philosophically I am more a sort of Feynman-like scientist. There are lots of things I don’t know: but that’s all right. It is better to live with honest uncertainty than to commit to something just because you feel a need for finality?

Song of Songs 8:6 has an ambivalent translation that might be a reference to the Tetragrammaton, and AIUI it’s common in Christian circles to read it as a metaphor for Christ’s love for the church, though I agree it’s more likely just some ancient erotica that happened to find its way into Biblical canon.

Definitely! I’m glad I found a group that’s explicitly progressive as well. They were handing out ICE whistles in the lobby and they’ve been collaborating with several of the more progressive churches in the area to help find sanctuary for migrants.

The single biggest piece of advice I got on Jewish Reddit was to make sure I called ahead or sent an email before showing up the first time. Jewish houses of worship have a lot of reasons to be wary of strangers these days, and quite a few of them have armed security and heavy-duty doors that can’t be bashed open and the like. I didn’t see any security team at last night’s event aside from the two greeters at the door, but that doesn’t mean they weren’t there, and one of them did have to unlock the door to let me in.

I didn’t really have any kind of religious upbringing growing up. My dad was Catholic and my mom came from an evangelical family, but neither of them were observant by the time I was born. We didn’t go to church and I’m not sure we even had a Bible in the house. We celebrated Christmas and Easter, but purely the secular aspects. There was nary a mention of Jesus to be found. The only Bible stories I got exposed to when I was little were Old Testament legends - Adam and Eve, Noah’s Ark, David and Goliath, Samson, so on. The only kind of prayer I ever learned about was the silly freeform stuff that kids pray for (e.g. God, please make it snow so I don’t have to go to school tomorrow, etc.) The only times I ever went to church were when my parents would send my sister and I to stay with our maternal grandma for the weekend, because she taught Sunday school at the Salvation Army. By the time I got exposed to the story of Jesus I was old enough to realize that it didn’t make sense to me. God had a son, and he was betrayed and killed, which was bad, but also good, because before we were all going to Hell, and now we’re all going to Heaven, but only if we believe in him? Never made sense to me, and as I got to be an angsty teenager I saw how much Christianity was being used to justify racism and bigotry and right-wing politics, which turned me off the idea altogether.

In contrast, doing Jewish stuff feels good. Something as simple as saying “Baruch ata Adonai eloheynu melech ha-olem ha-motzi lechem min ha-aretz” before I eat helps me feel centered. I like that the emphasis isn’t on what you believe, but what you do, and on being a good person in this world because it’s the right thing to do instead of because you expect a supernatural reward. “The righteous of all nations have a place in the World To Come” makes a lot more sense than “Believe on the Lord and thou shalt be saved”. (The temple even rents their space to a Unity congregation on Sundays.) Instead of insisting that science and observable evidence and logic is faulty and mystical visions had 2500 years ago by people who didn’t even know the world wasn’t flat are literally true, the Jewish approach (especially the Reconstructionist approach) is that if the Bible is wrong, then it presents an opportunity to use your brain to figure out what wisdom can be derived from that mistake.

It makes a lot more sense to me, both logically and emotionally.

I’m not sure when I’ll make it to a Shabbat. This temple only does a traditional Shabbat service every other week. I almost always work on Saturdays, and my work schedule means I’d have to slip out before the end of the service to catch the bus.

The next service I’ll DEFINITELY be attending is the community seder the rabbi is hosting at the temple next month. It’s being catered by a local Assyrian restaurant that’s serving a kosher meal of Jewish favorites (matzo ball soup, gefilte fish, savory potato kugel, etc.) alongside the ritual foods. I hope it’ll be very educational and meaningful.

It seems none of the Dopers who accused you of cultural appropriation before have spoken up here, so looks like you’re doing it right.

Great advice.

I would definitely call ahead and give them my contact information before attempting a visit.

When I was researching Virginia options a couple years ago I called one congregation and they explained their security protocol.

I found one in the Pittsburgh, PA area that required you download your driver’s license before visiting.
There was a mass shooting at a Pittsburgh (Squirrel Hill) synagogue in 2018 so this makes total sense.

They are very security conscious these days.

The one in Virginia seemed very welcoming and I might try to visit this year if I can arrange everything.

Mazel tov!

It has been so long since I’ve been to a Schul that I had no idea what security measures were in place. If I just showed up with no guns or other weapons, what could I do?

I would assume it depends on the synagogue/temple/shul. I imagine measures are probably stricter in red states and places where the congregation is more visibly Jewish than this hippy-dippy left wing congregation in Olympia in a building that used to be a Christian Science church.

I assume that since the rabbi knew who I was from the online classes and they already have my address and financial information there wasn’t too much vetting they needed to do.

Very interesting. I found both a translation that uses the LORD and one that doesn’t, and neither has a footnote. The former is the ESV, which I understand to be a more dogmatic translation while the latter is the NRSVUE, which I understand to be accepted by critical scholars as one of the best. I’m very intrigued on what is going on there.

I am a bit more aware of the discussion of the book being canon, and how it wasn’t even just Christians who tried to argue that it was not just erotic poetry. But I’ve seen some more modern interpretations that it shows how sex and love are part of a healthy marriage.

I’ve also heard that Esther was known to be fictional when written, and is in part actually making fun of the Persian empire.

The rabbis in my class have been quite clear that in their opinion, Esther and Ruth are both pure fiction. Ruth, as I understand it, is thought to have been an argument against the ban on marrying non-Jews that was instituted during the administration of Ezra and Nehemiah - after all, if David himself was descended from a convert, then surely intermarriage couldn’t be a bad thing, right?

I hadn’t heard the “making fun of the Persian Empire” part about Esther, but it does make sense of things like “the king can’t override his decree so he has to issue a new decree instead to give the Jews permission to fight back” and “the king exiled the queen because she refused to dance naked for his drunk buddies” and “Haman (SHAKES GROGGER) thinks the king is going to honor him, but he honors Mordechai instead!” parts. It’s certainly treated as a satire in the Purim reading, so it makes sense that it was always intended as one.

Well, Purim’s over, so I guess we can hijack this now. :smiling_face_with_sunglasses:

The entire Song of Songs is traditionally read as an allegory of the loving relationship between God and the Jewish people, but I’m curious what’s supposed to be unique about that verse.

Song of Songs 8:6 in the JPS translation is:

Let me be a seal upon your heart, like the seal upon your hand.
For love is as fierce as death, passion is as mighty as Sheol;
Its darts are darts of fire, a blazing flame.

I don’t know Hebrew well enough to comment on the accuracy of the translation, but I can see that it does closely follow the grammatical structure of the original. Looking at other Jewish translations, they all seem to generally agree. Some use “strong” instead of “fierce”, some translate “Sheol” as “death” or “the grave” rather than leaving it untranslated, and some render ahavah, which has the plain meaning of “love”, as “jealousy”. There’s certainly no explicit reference to God there, although one translation does use “God’s fire” in the last line (see below).

Many Orthodox translations of the Song are extremely non-literal and intended to make the allegorical meaning quite explicit; these sorts of translations do refer to God directly, but that’s also true of every other verse.

The first part is obviously a callback to Exodus 13:9, “And this shall serve you as a sign on your hand and as a reminder on your forehead”. For Jews, this clearly refers to the mitzvah of tefillin; we’re supposed to tie small wooden boxes containing parchment with Torah verses written on it to our arms and heads during prayer. In the allegorical interpretation, the Jews are here asking God to reciprocate and wear tefillin to remind Him of their love for Him. Christians, of course, don’t wear tefillin, so it makes sense they would need to find a different interpretation.

The second part is also interesting; “Sheol” is the Biblical term for the Underworld, here apparently being used as a synonym for “death”. The Biblical concept of the afterlife is quite vague, and crucially seems to be the same for everyone; it lacks the concept of reward and punishment for one’s actions during life.

By Talmudic times, the Jews had picked up that notion from the Babylonians, and so the Rabbis interpret this verse as alluding to God’s love being strong enough to save the faithful from death, while the last line alludes to flames of Hell (aka “Gehinnom”).

Artscroll has:

For the sake of my love, place me like a seal on your heart, like a seal to dedicate your strength to me, for strong till the death is my love; though their zeal for vengeance is hard as the grave, its flashes are flashes of fire from the flame of God".

This non-literal, long-winded translation focuses on God’s strength protecting from death, not figuratively by providing an afterlife, but literally, by protecting the Jews from their earthly enemies.

Yeah, Ruth was definitely written well after when it was set. It even talks about the way things were “in those days.” The original husbands names are ridiculous: Sickness and Consumption. Yeah, their parents really named them that, and it’s not just because they die at the beginning of the book.

Watched a podcast on Ruth recently.

That brings to mind an interesting theory about Melchizedek. He’s one of the stranger characters in the Torah - he shows up out of nowhere in the middle of an unrelated story about Abraham’s war against the kings of Canaan, hailing from a city that shouldn’t exist yet that early in the primeval history, as a member of a priesthood that didn’t exist yet, gives Abraham a blessing, presents him with a tithe (which many modern Bibles for some reason translate as Abraham tithing to him instead), then disappears.

The likely explanation is that the Hellenic-era author who compiled the Torah misinterpreted a passage in Psalm 110, “You are a priest forever in the order of melech-tzedek (I.e. “the righteous king”)” as referring to a person named Melech-Tzedek, and saw fit to introduce such a character into the Torah narrative in order to make sense of the psalm.