Delicately braised in a white wine sauce and served over chickpeas with a good hearty Cabernet, perhaps with some french fries and some good Heinz 57 sauce or catchup…
Yes, but the argument hinges on whether they taste like real chickens or simply figurative chickens…
Chicken actually tastes like Balrog, since the Balrog came before the egg. The only real difference is in the slightly tangy taste of Balrog that’s been dinning on Russian. If you get the dwarf fed variety, then the taste and texture is remarkably similar.
Your title and post suggests that you acquired your information from somewhere other than the internet. So-how did you learn about the subject?
In Middle Earth, adventurers came inside evil mountain. In Russia, Evil Mountain comes inside you!
I’m going to go way out on a limb and guess “evolution”.
And it burns!
…then leaves a ten-spot on the nightstand before sneaking out the next morning.
Of course he doesn’t. If you aren’t a barbarian, you know that Balrogs are served on toast points, not crackers. And lots of vodka to wash it down…
(The vodka would explain a lot, though.)
If you mean his mother drank a lot while she was pregnant, sure. 
In Russia, Balrog eats you.
With caviar.
And vodka (for the flambaise).
By the way, Snowboarder Bo did a very interesting thing with [noparse]
[quote]
[/noparse] boxes up there, in Post #14, that I don’t think I’ve seen done before.
The entire text of the whole quote box is a clickable link to the Wiki article he quoted. Click anywhere in the quote and it opens a new tab there.
I’m going to have to remember that!
(And yes, I’ve figured out how he did it.)
The One Cockring?
I think it’s a subtle callout to the Czar. Yannow, Czar being Russian and all.
Or, maybe not. I’m wavering in my opinions regarding the abilities on display here.
Isn’t a Balrog, tho. It’s really the mouth of Hell. That burny shit in Turkmenistan is just to throw people off the scent.
Although, Satandoes come out and hang his nads in the cool breeze in the doorway every once in a while, so I can see how people would confuse him with a Balrog.
Maybe Putin saw Dr. Strangelove too many times…
Or the Fellowship of the Ring.
odd that you should mention President Putin’s name on the same day that he has announced his divorce from his wife of almost 30 years.
your emails are now being traced and what exactly is the “Fellowship of the Ring” that you speak of?
Is it another one of those unknown secret clubs?
Well, some have described the fandom of J. R. R. Tolkien as a secret club of sorts… 
Of course, when we now know that you are not aware of the name of one of the Books from The Lord of the Rings we have to wonder if you are thinking that all other references to a Balrog are supposed to be taken seriously.
Here is a big tip as the whoosh is strong in you: **No one is taking you seriously. **
I wouldn’t be so sure of that if I were you, besides I didn’t ask you to take me seriously. I simply pointed out that the USSR is taking the future of nuclear war seriously 
The USSR?
Did they change their name again? I’m sorry that was the 1998 name …