Similar to some other threads, but I came up with another topic not otherwise covered:
I beat it like it owed me money.
I beat it like it reported me to the IRS.
I beat it like a rented mule.
Like a red headed stepchild.
Any more you can think of?
Drive it like it was stolen.
I’d fucking like it now.
That’s if their in a good mood.
Hit it like the fist of a wrathful god.
shake it
polaroid picture
Hit it like a freight train full of sledgehammers!
I’d tap that like it was the winning melon at the state fair
Bang him/her like a screen door.
Two of my favorites (I credit them both to my brother, the radio personality):
I’d hit it like a gypsy hits a tamborine.
I’d tap that like a frat boy tappin’ a keg.
Hit it like a freight train on a stalled Yugo.
May I point out:
Best title/username combo ever!! 
Damn you!
I’d stomp it like a narc at a biker rally.
I’d squeeze it like a bottle of ketchup.
Mine is from an image macro. Here’s a link:
(the more you bang her the looser she gets…)
I’d
not
like it
if I got laid off.