I'd like to introduce you to my husband's "friend"

This bitch is a work of art. Her husband – who is actually my husband’s friend – is a nice guy. A little odd, but otherwise pretty cool. I like him ok. The wife – I shall call her “Willow” – is another story. She’s one of those people that is always complaining. About anything and everything. Nothing is ever her fault – she has trouble understanding that the only common denominator for all of her failed relationships, job interviews, attempts for promotions, etc is HER.
She goes through the most predictable cycles every few weeks:

  1. I hate my job, everyone there is incompetent except me, they all suck, the rules are stupid, I hate them all.
  2. Oh, wish me luck, I just applied for a new job! I think I will get it because I am so awesome and my boss said he would recommend me!
  3. I decided I didn’t want that other job, mine is so much better, and the people I work with are so much smarter, nicer, cuter, cooler, etc.
  4. I didn’t get that job, oh well, I think I am about to get a promotion.
  5. I got fired! WTF? I am the best person in the world, and I have superpowers, how dare they! Oh well, I can get any job I want, I am so awesome.
  6. I got a job. I am being trained to be master of the universe and GM.
  7. I hate my job as a cashier, everyone here sucks, ad infinitum

I read her blogs for the same reason you slow down and rubberneck when you see a wreck – I just can’t fucking believe anyone could really be that bad. Ugh. I just thought I would share this week’s blog with you all, as it really shows her inner beauty. Copy/pasted all misspellings/racism/idiocy intact:

I think her last sentence says it all.

That was my thought, too.

I like the last sentence and the preceding four.

I’m a really big fan of this little stream of this little stream-of-consciousness segment:

I’m not much of a fan of “segeration” either. Now Steve Miller, him I like.

What language is this woman speaking? I can imagine her ranting about ebonics, but ebonics is practically Shakespearean compared to the pidgin English she’s writing.

You should be shot with a silver bullet* for that one!

*This is an effort at making a bad pun, and should not be construed to imply wishing death, harm, or even constipation on lieu or any other person who is staff, member, guest, or in any other way affiliated with these boards.

That’s pretty funny. If you want to know what goes on inside a white trash gal from East Nashville’s head there you have it.
I’m glad that she cleared up the fact for me that she’s not a racist but the stereotypes still linger.

Remark from one of my coworkers, seeing the OP in passing “what a wall of text! Does the writer work in construction or something?”

always accompanies a racist statement

Seriously, one of my favourite blogs of hers was one in which she ranted about how her coworkers had “such bad grammer” and “coulnt spell there way out of a papar bag!” I am admittedly a grammar nazi and it actually is painful for me to read her blogs. This one, though, takes the cake.
Hampshire – the funny part about what you said is that this woman is from a very privileged home. White trash (like any other racial stereotype) is not based on finances or upbringing, but on individual ignorance.

Ha ha! I have a friend on LiveJournal that I keep for the same sad entertainment value. This is the girl who will complain how she’s gotten SO FAT (she’s now a size 8) since she’s gained about 20 lbs since moving, but then write:

Jesus Christ! Two arby melts, curly fries, a turnover and regular (she doesn’t drink diet) pop is around 1550 calories! No freakin’ wonder you’re gaining weight!
Or this gem:

(asterisks are mine). She’s obviously very sorry if it sounds racist, since she goes ahead and posts it anyway. I also love how she doesn’t seem to realize that there are BLACK workers who had to work that day and WHITE school kids have the day off, too. Apparently only black students get MLK day off. And everyone who is white has to work or go to school. Or something.

Ignorant people often accuse others of being ignorant
Racists often accuse others of being racist
Lazy people often accuse others of being lazy
Liars pretty much always accuse everyone else of being a huge liar
None of them are intellectually honest enough to admit to seeing a problem in themselves, or to change

These people can either be funny or completely maddening to watch, depending on your attitude. I teeter on the precipice.

I’m a bit sorry I read that, since it means that because there’s apparently a real person behind it, I can’t hold on to my desperate hope that whenever I read something like that on the net, it’s really just a sophisticated postmodern parody.

I thought I might drop a few excerpts from her other blogs for everyone to get a better view of “Willow”. This is from right before she quit her previous “management” job – and speaks volumes about her work ethic (or lack thereof):

So, basically, a guy has the nerve to be upset that no one bothers to contact him about approximately $6000 in errors – how dare he? So she thinks the proper action is to give out her boss’ personal cell phone number? I kid you not. If I had been that boss, I would have fired her on the spot for that, regardless of how short-handed I was.

****'s used to protect the innocent, this idiot doesn’t care, so I had to re-read the trainwreck to make sure I didn’t leave any names intact. WTF is a “vavaction day”?

That blog would make an awesome greeting in a card. Maybe send it to her for her birthday.

I do apologise for the “wall of text” but that is a cut and paste exactly as it appears on her blog…sigh…


For you have found the ancient one reincarnated…the one who was the model for all SDMBers to follow :slight_smile:

I don’t think there’s actually a DSM category for this person’s personality disorder, but there should be.

I am also hazarding a guess that her cellphone bills are astronomical.

It never ceases to amaze me. The sheer - what would you call it? Self involvement? of some people. They put this kind of crap on the internet - on a “blog” - because WHY? WHO FUCKING CARES (I mean other than for the comedic value - Litoris - I will send you $5 if you email me the direct link to this - she makes me feel SMART!) about the minutiae of her sad little life - is she deluded enough to think she has a FAN BASE???

I can’t work up enough enthusiasm to give that much of a shit about my own damn day let alone someone elses. Snort - this just cracked me up! And I’m serious - she makes me feel smart! :smiley: Thank you for sharing, Litoris!!!

Seriously - I’ll send you $5 for the URL - I would love to pass this around to some friends, too! It’s a riot and a 1/2!