I am getting older. Not planning on kicking off soon but it probably isn’t more than 15 years off. I also know that internet advice is always suspect but I am really just looking for ideas I might not know about so I can scamper off and explore them in much greater detail.
My daughter is high end autistic. If you met her you wouldn’t notice anything wrong right away. If you spent time with her you might get the feeling she is a little ‘off’. However, she will never be able to hold a job and is on disability…which isn’t much, tbh. The health care part of it is more valuable than the 10 grand or so she gets a year.
I am thinking something like a trust where she gets $x a year. It doesn’t have to be idiot-proof as she has a good head and likely won’t blow the money on crap and I have distilled in her a healthy…suspicion…of people trying to ‘help’ her. She will get the house, likely paid off, when my wife dies (I plan to go first )
I worry she won’t be able to find anyone to get good advice from when issues pop up in life. My wife’s family is useless and mine is far flung and not close so family is likely out. It would be nice if she had someone to go to when issues pop up. Left to her own devices, she will freeze up and do nothing.
Any ideas you can point me in the general direction of?
Is there anything that fits this bill than going to a lawyer to set it up?
You mentioned your family and your wide’s family, but nothing about any sort of social worker. I would imagine that the social services industry has a wealth of ideas that you could mine and sift through. (I apologize in advance if this comes off as superficial or otherwise unfeeling.)
Presuming the “disability” benefits she receives is SSI, you will want to ensure that any trust/resources are styled so as to not be countable resources disqualifying her from SSI.
Not sure who you would have handle that other than a lawyer. There are right and wrong ways to do it. Folk regularly do it wrong, and run into problems. Shouldn’t be complicated or expensive.
One idea for the trust would be to set up some kind of annuity where she gets $X/month. Anyone can buy an annuity at any time which does this. You pay $XXX up front and you get $X/month for Y months. You could instruct the executor to purchase the annuity from the assets in your estate.
You might want to reconsider having her live in the house. Homes require all kinds of regular maintenance, and things go from bad to worse when it’s not done. It might be better to have her live in an apartment where she can call someone if something breaks. You might want to have her live in a nearby apartment now so it’s not a shock to move out of the house when you’re gone and you can help her figure out how to live on her own in the meantime.
Money spent on an estate lawyer will be well worth it, as you want to make sure she is taken care of properly after you’re gone. You don’t want her to have to deal with legal or financial issues trying to get anything straightened out. The legal issues are the simple issues to figure out. There’s not a good answer to ensuring she has a trusted person to turn to. You can have a lawyer administer the trust, but that’s expensive and there’s no guarantee that the lawyer you pick today will be around later. If there is anyone in your extended family that is a good parent (cousins, uncles, etc.), consider asking them even if they aren’t particularly close to your daughter. A good parent will likely do a good job of looking out for her because they will likely have the right kind of personality.
I’m in a similar situation (getting older, stepson is mentally handicapped (IQ about 49, but functional to a point–could never live alone tho), no family to step up, etc.). Have some ideas, but will be following along here for more and/or advice.
I think an estate lawyer is ultimately the way to go, but you probably want to start with an honest assessment of her capabilities with regards to her taking care of herself and a property. For instance, perhaps she can cope with a daily routine, but how does she deal with items that happen routinely but less frequently (changing HVAC filters, cleaning gutters, seeing a dentist every six months, paying property taxes, etc.). Can changes be made to the house now in preparation? Once you have that, you can reach out and determine what services are available to assist her once she is on her own. Then work forward from there.
(I don’t mean to be dismissive of your daughter’s abilities, but between “high end” and “never be able to hold a job” seems to be a pretty large span)
As for finding a solution for people to assist her, consider checking in with state or national Autism associations or support groups to ask for ideas of what might work in your area. I would guess there are some creative solutions out there if the right people are asked. There is a saying in the disability rights movement: “don’t take directions from someone who hasn’t been there”.[I’ve been there]
Benefits planners can also be consulted to confirm that plans won’t impact the medical coverage through Medicare/Medicaid, or at least to tell you what the impact will be.
Lastly, every state has a Protection and Advocacy organization that you could ask about whether a compensated professional guardian would be a good idea to consider. In some states the guardianship laws and practices might work well, in others they are draconian and a morass.
I’m in a similar situation with my son… although I have more than 15 yrs left. .
I have guardianship and am actively looking for any services available to him. Next step is getting him approved for DDA services… they offer life long support with employment and housing (if needed) you said your daughter will have your house and that’s great.
Did I write this OP? because this sounds exactly my situation. We wound up with a trust, where we have named a financial institution to be the executor and financial guardian. We have no relatives we can rely on and no friends that are young enough to step up to the plate…plus I don’t want to burden them with this.
So, I’d second the ‘estate planning lawyer’. My daughter gets disability, but the funds she can draw from the trust for things/living will not count against her as income. How this works, I don’t really know…“I got a guy” …she’s set us up lawyer-wise and I trust her.
I’m more concerned about how we are going to be cared for when we need it, as my daughter will not be able to.
As a financial advisor, this is crucial advice. I would seek out a referral from the disability estate lawyer you will be working with - they should have some excellent working relationships.
Thanks for the replies. It looks like my old idea of getting an estate lawyer involved seems to be the best.
As for family, I might have been too hasty. There are the kids to also look at (other family members kids) who, in 10 years could very well be good for this sort of thing. A couple of them look very impressive to me so far. We will see.
I’m yet another “did I write this OP?” My daughter is high functioning, you wouldn’t know she’s autistic on first meeting her, etc… and I don’t see her ever holding down a job (for more than a couple of weeks, anyway).
I want to second what Lintu wrote above. We’ve got Daughter “in the system” with the county and the state. Like the OP, she has full medical coverage, and gets a few hundred dollars a month from SSI. She has a case worker with the county, and through a brokerage she has a personal advocate. All on the county/state’s dime.
We’re realizing we should have pursued guardianship when she turned 18, so that’s next on our plate (she turned 20 last month). As for setting her up financially, I’ll continue to watch this thread with interest.
For the situation where you’re setting up a trust for someone who could be taken advantage of, what are some options to ensure the trust administrator is acting in good faith? Can a regular audit by an independent accounting firm be mandated or something like that? If there is no oversight over the trust administrator and the beneficiary is not competent to bring up issues, it seems like the potential for fraud would be high.
“Living with a disability is often associated with significant amounts of extra costs. That’s why individuals and families can now contribute to ABLE accounts — tax-advantaged savings accounts that can fund disability expenses.”
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