Opening rhetorical question inquiring as to the problem with random ethnic group/country/political party/evolutionists/reputable SDMB poster. Statement to the effect that subject of thread is stupid. Recitation of spoon-fed worldviews that have remained unchallenged in Idiot’s mind. Statement to the effect that such views are reasonable, and that those holding views antithetical to same are likely mentally deficient and/or a minion of Satan.
Brief interlude to ask in vain for support from fellow posters. Unsucessfully subtle attempt to discourage intelligent discussion of issue.
Unforgivable spelling, capitalization, and grammatical errors.
Closing remarks that contain a gradual logarithmic increase in the density of profanity. Ramblings slowly becoming less and less understandable. Ending sentence that is not decipherable.
Signature linking to Idiot’s single web page, which includes a bright orange background and several <blink> tags.
Gratuitous mentioning of the word “mung”. Gratuitous mentioning of the “Enterprise vs. Star Destroyer” thread. Gratuitous mentioning of the Toothpaste Story.
Random insult consisting of bodily waste orifices and lack of control of fecal material, ending with a comment about this thread being a nearly-exact duplicate of a few previous ones.
Random, good-natured insult directed at either Coldfire or slythe.
Statement of dismay at what general demeanor of users has become.
Hopeful suggestion that secondary OP was in jest or possibly misunderstood.
Bitter realization after reading on through entire thread that the original post was indeed not in jest and was as a matter of fact less than lucid.
Immidiate declaration of fealty to any parties standing against poster of contested OP.
Signature line which combines wit and nostalgia and makes mention that someone likes me.
Restatement of original post with minor cosmetic changes made under the impression that the language choices in the original post somehow obscured the inherent righteousness of the complaintant’s position.
Mis-attribution of rebuttal statements to the wrong posters.
Point by point refutation of dissenting points that uses logic so convoluted as to require Mobius to unravel it, including a liberal helping of the straw man fallacy.
Random statements about the veracity of posters.
Obscene gerund - vulgar adverb stretched to include everyone who disagrees with original post.
Tortured relation of OP to GQ thread started by this poster two months ago. Audible wonderment at the singling out of this poster for unfair abuse, and eventual thread closure, by manhattan.
Bitter-unto-the-point-of-toxicity comparison of SDMB to random exclusionary club. Obligatory invocation of Nazi Germany. Unfavorable comparison of manhattan’s moderation, and by extension that of the SDMB entire, to totalitarian government of third-world country.
Speculation to the effect that this poster is the lone voice of reason among a board full of madmen. Further speculation, in a fit of passive-agressiveness that would make Marcia Brady blush, that this very thread will be closed simply by virtue of the appearance in it of this poster.
Indented bold quotation of Cervaise’s post in its entirety. Sarcastic apology for mistaken grammar and spelling. Facetious, though deliciously ironic explanation that said mistakes are the result of Idiot’s obviously inferior intelligence. Excuse for not being a good speller.
Admonishments directed at Cervaise for nitpicking Idiot’s spelling instead of discussing Issue. Accusation that Cervaise is incapable of intelligent discussion of Issue because opinion expressed in OP is correct.
Original merely stupid idea elaborated at on length, until original Idiot’s posting seems sane by comparison. Vehement assertion that it is impossible for the universe to be structured in any alternative fashion. Insinuation that to think otherwise is sufficient proof of descent from a tree that doesn’t fork.
Strange digression that is not so much a hijack as a rambling disposition on a word or concept similar to one used by the OP, leading to conclusions that are as impressive in their lack of relevance as they are exemplary in their idiopathic Byzantine logic.
Gratuitous use of the word feculent.
Non-obscure reference to edgy mainstream culture.
A long paragraph response to all who have suggested up to this point that the present poster is full of shit, explaining that: that’s not what they said; it is so because they say its so— what can’t you comprehend about that? and impugning excessive density as the true barrier to reveling in the poster’s brilliance.
[Three more bulky paragraphs that everyone scrolls past, life being too short.]
