If Inigo Montoya belonged to other cultural stereotypes

Cafe Society
61

This is the land. Florin. 8:03 p.m. I’m on my regular patrol. My name is Montoya. I’m a cop.

8:23 p.m. I encountered a man who seemed familiar. I identified myself and asked him his business. He identified himself as a Count Rugen. I noticed he had six fingers on one hand. I remembered that my father had been killed by a Florin politician who had six fingers. Rugen had to be the man. I informed him that he was under arrest, and took him in.

8:36 p.m. Rugen and I arrived at the station. My partner Gannon took him to be booked. I got some coffee.

9:12 p.m. Rugen was booked and waiting in an interview room. Gannon had set him up with a sandwich and coffee, and some cigarettes, and made small talk. Then it was my turn.

11:58 p.m. Under careful questioning, Rugen cracked like a cheap dinner plate. He admitted killing my father. My father had been a cop. Cop killers get the chair in Florin.

I told him he should prepare to die.

62

Inigo Montoya: My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father…

Count Rugen: Cite?

63

Stately plump Inigo Montoya came from the stairhead bearing a bowl of lather on which a mirror and a razor lay crossed. A yellow holocaust cloak, ungirdled, was sustained gently-behind him by the mild morning air. He held the bowl aloft and intoned:

– Mawage is wot bwings us togeder tooday.

Halted, he peered down the dark winding stairs and called up coarsely:

– My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die, you fearful Jesuit.

64

Joe Friday, not – what was that, Raymond Chandler?

“This is the city: Florin City, Florin. A lot of people live here; most of them have never killed anyone. But there’s one man here who killed my father, and he should prepare to die. My name is Inigo Montoya. I carry a sword.”

65

Prince of Amber : "My name is Inigo Montoya and you killed my father. Good shot ! But prepare to die anyway; that was just a Shadow duplicate and he’s standing right behind you. "

66

Oohh! Can anyone do Anne Rice?

67

d3f pwn3d n00b

68

As he watched the the man die, Vimes realized that Count-My-Fingers Rugen had no idea who it was who had killed him, and why; but then, Sgt. Montoya was a good man.

69

Narn :

“I am In’go. You killed my father. First you will know pain. Then you will know fear. Then you will die.”

70

Winner! :smiley:

71

Do you read the Bible, Count? There’s this particular passage I got memorized, sorta fits this occasion. Ezekiel 25:17: The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the iniquity of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who in the name of charity and good will shepherds the weak through the Valley of Darkness, for he is truly his brother’s keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down on thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy My father. And you will know my name Inigo Montoya when I lay My vengeance upon you!

72

Thanks for coming. Listen, I gotta be back on the trading floor in exactly eight minutes and four seconds. Awright, c’mere. You got this spot on your rrrrip! Okay, jugular, carotid. Hope you were prepared. You’re dying for killing my dad. Gotta run.

73

And from South Boston it’s:

“Yah, I’m Inigo Montoyah. You killed my faathaa! Now youah gonnah get shoat! Lemme just go to the packie befoah I sobah up. Faaaced!”

and on preview:

Amazing! I love HK-47!!

74

My name is Inigo O’Montoly. You killed my father, arsehole. Now die you piece of shit.

My name is Inigo “O-Dog” Montaya. You capped the ol man. You go’a get got.
My name is Inigo Montayavich. Father kills YOU!
My name is Inigo Montoyus. You killed my father. Pwepare to die.

Count Rugen: (Snicker)

75

Witness if you will a castle surrounded by a small town in turn surrounded by a pleasant pastoral countryside. This land has many inhabitants. Each going along his or her own way. But right now, we concern ourselves with one in particular. Inigo Montoya, an artist. But his art has nothing to do with paint or plaster. His medium is the sword. His inspiration is revenge. Revenge for the death of his father–ruthlessly murdered. For the record, the killer was Rugen. A count distinguished by the six-fingers he had on his left hand. Inigo made it his life’s goal to find this six-fingered man and settle the debt. But nothing is ever as easy as it seems. Particularly when addiction enters the picture. But a chance encounter with a Man-in-Black may lead Inigo to the redemption he’s been searching for…or possibly to his ultimate demise.

(Okay, so it’s not a cultural stereotype.)

76

Alt version of DataZak’s entry…

Inigo Montoya: Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father…

Count Rugen: Screen shot, or it didn’t happen!

77

That last sentence should say,
“But a chance encounter with a Man-in-Black may lead Inigo to the redemption he’s been searching for . . . or possibly to his ultimate demise . . . here . . . in the Twilight Zone.”

78

But the “Twilight Zone” mention was typically reserved for the closing narrations, IIRC.

79

I am Spock Montoya. You killed my father. While emotion says I should kill you, logic indicates that now you are subdued and of no immediate harm to do so would violate numerous laws and ethical philosophies. However, as I am presently more in touch with my human sides for reasons explained in the current movie, I believe I will go with a vengeance killing.

80

Tyler Perry’s The Princess Bride

Part 1:

M’dea: "You the man killed my daddy. (Fires 8 shots.) “Oh my bad… you just kinda look like him… well, no sense crying over spilted milk.”

Part 2:

Much-Abused-Proud-Black-Woman-Who’s-the-Paint-By-the-Numbers-Heroine-of-this-One: "You killed my father… but I’m gonna forgive you, after some really loud and mediocre gospel music, and then my grandmother M’dea is gonna come kneecap you and let you bleed to death so that I can still keep my Christian message intact but the audience will see you get payback.

DAN BROWN’S THE MONTOYA CODE

Langdon: He killed my father.

Heroine: You mean patricide?

Langdon: That is a misconception. Patricide is (i) the act of killing one’s father, or (ii) a person who kills his or her father. The word patricide derives from the Latin word pater (father) and the Latin suffix -cida (cutter or killer). Patricide is a sub-form of parricide, which is defined as an act of killing a close relative, thus it would only be patricide if I killed him.

Heroine: Or your brother. Or even a sister.

Langdon: Exactly.

Heroine: So are you going to kill him as an act of revenge? A vendetta as it were, or a blood debt?

Langdon: Actually a blood debt would be one that I myself owed to, say, a person who saved or spared my life. But yes, since he did in fact kill my father, not unlike Oliver Cromwell killed the father of King Charles II, who was King Charles I, to advance the cause of Catholicism…

Heroine: I am rather certain that Oliver Cromwell, Lord Protector of England, born in 1599 died in 1658, September, was a Puritan and in fact zealously anti Catholic.

Langdon: Most people believe that, but in fact Cromwell was every bit as devout a Catholic as Galileo was an Illuminati and as zealous a Catholic as da Vinci was a propagandist for Church secrets.

Heroine: Indeed. So will you kill him?

Langdon: Yes, after some debating I think that I will… but where is he?

Heroine: He must have run out during the exposition.