Rogers and Hammerstein version:
Song 1. Frodo and the other 8 travelers.
(?How do you solve a problem like Maria??)
How do you solve a problem like Moria?
How do you catch an orc and bring it down?
How do you find a word that means Moria?
A tunnel of darkness? A mountain of mist? Khazad-dúm?
Many a thing you know would like to kill you.
Many a thing will stop you getting through.
But how do you break away
And run for the light of day?
How do you make sure Gandalf makes it too?
Oh, how do you solve a problem like Moria?
How, do you keep your . . . sword . . . from . . . glow-ing . . . bluuuuuuuuuue?
Song 2. Inside Moria. Battle scene.
(?I Have Confidence?)
Frodo: [spoken] A troll with armies of orcs . . . what’s so fearsome about that?
[sung] It ought to be so exciting,
to be fighting like this in the cave!
I’ve always wanted adventure . . . Then why can’t I be brave . . .
Oh . . .
I have confidence in Gandalf! I have confidence in Sam!
I have confidence that spring will come again!
Besides which I sing, I have confidence in Sting!
Sting doesn’t cut you lightly! Sting doesn’t bite in vain!
Sting bites a troll with careful fingers, when he comes out, Come out! It’s healthy,
I have confidence in Elrond! Everything will turn out fine!
I have confidence in confidence alone . . .
Besides which I sing, I have con-fi-dence in Stiiiiiiiing!
[Stabs troll. Close-up on triumphant face. Fade to black.]
Song 3. Around the campfire. Night. Sam, teaching the others to sing.
(?Do, Re, Mi?)
[Sam, speaking.] Now guys, singing is very easy, once you learn the rules.
[sings]When you read you begin with?
[Pippen] ABC!
[Sam] and when you sing, you being with Fro, ray, me.
[others echo] Fro, ray, me.
[Sam] The first 3 notes just happen to be, fro ray, me.
[others echo] Fro, ray, me.
[Sam] Fro ray me ha foe claw glee . . . oh, let’s see if I can make this easier.
Fro, do dear, a hobbit dear,
Ray, a light from Gandalf’s staff,
Me, a name I call myself,
Ha, a pleasant elfish laugh.
Foe, a guy from Sauron’s team,
Claw, upon an orc-y?s toe,
Glee, a trait we sometimes show,
That will bring us back to Fro-oh-oh-do,
[All] Fro! Do dear! A hobbit dear! (etc.)
[Sam speaks again] Now, to make a song, we just put the notes together like this.
Foe, fro, claw, ha, me, fro, ray.
Foe, fro, claw, glee, fro, ray, fro.
[Aragorn]: But it doesn’t mean anything!
[Sam] Then we put words to it, like this:
When you go to Riven-dell,
You will have a tale to tell!
[Aragorn] This is fun!
[excited, the fellowship begins to run around and sing]
[repeat chorus]
Song 4. Aragorn comforts the others during a snow storm.
(?My Favorite Things?)
[Speaking.] Now, whenever I’m afraid, I just think of a few of my favorite things.
[Merry] Like what, Aragorn?
[Aragron] Well . . .fireballs from dragons and wine from our elf-friends.
Gandalf and Arwen and Bilbo’s brass bookends,
[music starts]
Crowns that would fit on the foreheads of kings,
these are a few of my favorite things,
Bright steel scabbards and warm silver armor,
Swords that will swing from the arm of a farmer,
Silver-white horses that leap out of springs,
These are a few of my favorite things!
Dwarves with long beards in the midst of a melée,
Passing warriors which I jump out and waylay,
Poems in Elvish with lengthy refrains,
These are a few of my favorite things?
When the orc bites, When the troll stings,
When the balrog?s mad,
I simply remember my favorite things,
And then I don’t feeeeeeel, so, baaaaaaaaaad!!!
[repeat chorus.]
Song 5. Gollum. In a clearing, eyes glowing.
(?Edelweiss?)
My precioussss, my preciousssss,
every night I pursue you,
Small and gold, clean and cold,
Other eyes look right through you.
Little gold ring, it’s for you I sing.
Let him have you? Never!,
My preciousss, my preciousss,
you’re my precioussss forever.
My precioussss, my precioussss,
Nasty hobbitses take you.
Me they’ll find, right behind,
I will never forsake you.
You are my present, my birthday gift,
I am sly and clever,
My preciousss, my precioussss,
You’re my preciousss forever.
Song 6. Full company. Sauron.
(?The Lonely Goat-herd?)
High in a tower, a threat’ning warcry, lay-ee-oh, lay-ee-oh, lay-hee-ho.
A ?bend to my power, resist no more? cry, lay-dee-oh, lay-dee-oh, lay.
Orcs on the hill, smeared with blood and gore cry lay-ee-oh, lay-ee-oh, lay-hee-ho.
?We want to fight and to kill some more!?, cry lay-dee-oh, lay-dee-oh, lay.
Elves in their strongholds of days of yore cry lay-ee-oh, lay-ee-oh, lay-hee-ho.
But there’s a surprise from Sauron in store. Cry lay-dee-oh, lay-dee-oh, lay.
Galadriel’s forces can take no more, cry lay-ee-oh, lay-ee-oh, lay-hee-ho.
?Empe ar leminkaínen lingane temnor,? cry lay-dee-oh, lay-dee-oh, lay.
Blackness and filth in the land Mordor cry, lay-ee-oh, lay-ee-oh, lay-hee-ho.
Circling ravens cackling as they soar cry lay-dee-oh, lay-dee-oh, lay.
[Sauron: evil laughter]
Lay-de-laaaay-ohhhh,
Lay-de-leeeee-ohhhh,
Lay-de-laaaay-ohhhh,
Lay-de-lay-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha,
Lay-de-laaaay-ohhhh,
Lay-de-leeeee-ohhhh,
Lay-de-laaaay-ohhhh,
Lay-de-lay-ha-ha-ha-ha.
?Oh, I am rotten right to the core, cry lay-ee-oh, lay-ee-oh, lay-hee-ho.
Neither entreaty will soften me, nor cry. Lay-dee-oh, lay-dee-oh, lay.
?My deeds will live on in your tales and lore, cry lay-ee-oh, lay-ee-oh, lay-hee-ho.
Soon we’ll see who’s calling who a bore. Cry lay-dee-oh, lay-dee-oh, lay.
?Gandalf the grey lies inside earth’s core, cry lay-ee-oh, lay-ee-oh, lay-hee-ho.
He should have run faster for the door, cry lay-dee-oh, lay-dee-oh, lay.
?Happy am I, lay-de-oh, lay-de-lee-oh,
Oh, lay-do-oh, lay-de-lay-eeee-oh!
Soon little trav’lers will turn and flee-oh,
Lay-de-oh, lay-de-oh, lay. Hey!
