If one is saved, one will not go to hell. Get saved.

I was walking down the street with my friend. I almost accidentally stepped in front of a bus. My friend grabbed my arm and saved me from being flattened. Consequently, I will not be going to hell for another fifty years or so.

The bus driver looked disappointed.

I’ll just be in the corner contemplating my first impression- “A Jesus thread. By someone named Chickenhead. This is a comedic gift from God.”

I was already imagining a giant chicken-ish Jesus on the web page that would inevitably be linked. Oh, well.

Personally, I was thinking “That reminds me, I really should save myself right now, because I’m halfway through the Financial Aid quest and I don’t want to have to do this level over because Deckard Cain’s expositive dialogue gets so repetitive …”

Then I thought “Wow, I should really cut back on the espresso.”