Hey! Just a minute…
Ahem
OK, I’ll settle for the first 4. I’m not expecting miracles.
j
What? 
That was a joke about the post just before, what is there to report? :scratch head:
Okay, I’ll change that to: Barça wins more Liga Titles and Champions League Titles than Real Madrid before I die.
Thank yoiu for using Rick’s Genie Services for all your wishing needs. Please note the following issues with your wishes.
Wish 1 is insufficiently specific.
Wish 2 is insufficiently specific, as “Appropriate comforts” is a vague request and also many constitute a compound wish.
Wish 4 is insufficiently specific.
Please resubmit at your convenience, and thanks for getting me out of that lamp!
Moderator Note
This is extremely inappropriate. Take your lusts to penthouse forums or the like. Do not post things like this here.
Financial security - enough money to pay everything off, have enough money to last me until I die, enough to be able to leave something for my daughter and grandkids and enough money not to worry anymore…about money!
A lake home on a private lake - maybe even on an island
A home somewhere warm for winters
To die in my sleep after living a very long life with no medical issues - I’m extending that to all of my family
A cure for cancer - all of them
I guess numbers 2 & 3 would be the result of number 1 so I’ll add:
No more cruelty to animals
I’d be able to eat whatever I wanted without gaining weight or causing a health issue
Wow, free wishes! Thanks, RickJay.
All of humanity irrevocably decides that the Golden Rule should guide their dealings with one another from now on, treating others as they would themselves be treated (yes, yes, I know the sadomasochism joke).
I am given the power of mind control, particularly so I can make idiot and/or dangerous politicians embarrass themselves so badly in public (admitting their most terrible secrets, throwing up whenever they step behind a microphone, peeing their pants during every press conference, etc.) that even their most die-hard supporters abandon them.
A safe, cheap, effective COVID-19 vaccine is discovered next week
I can heal others, or myself, of any malady merely by thought
I can safely fly by the power of thought (I’ve had that wish since I was a kid).
“To a depth of one meter, I would like you to replace every piece of gravel on my property with a length of 1 cm or larger with an equal sized lump of gold.”
“If this is allowed, please conjure up a self-propelled 40 foot man lift so I can change the lamps on my signal.”
“I would like all the cast off trash, along the entire length of U.S. Interstate 5, a kilometer on both sides, to disappear.”
“Please construct a conventional sidewalk, curb and gutter along my property street frontage.” P.S. It should extend into the pavement, not onto my grass.
If you can do those four I don’t need another.
Is schizophrenia always completely debilitating? I don’t think so, and I also think one of the biggest problems re mental health is that there generally aren’t any outside signs so people go untreated for years or lifetimes if they aren’t able to articulate what’s going on in their heads. Also, maybe some people actually enjoy their mental states, divergent though they be–a lot of mental illness is really only a problem when it interfaces with other people who don’t know what’s going on. If your mental state doesn’t bother you then it won’t bother you.
And why would diabetes result in memory loss? That doesn’t make much sense. All I’m proposing is that anything that’s wrong with your body can be cured by aligning your mind to fix it–maybe aided by others who make a particular study of it or on your own if you know how. None of this shit where your body breaks down and nothing can be done about it–you could, but if you choose not to that’s cool. Because right now there’s a pervasive belief that people cause their own illnesses by wrongthinks and could make it all better if they just tried hard enough–why not make that actually work? No more interventionist medicine needed and plastic surgery a thing of the past because if you want something to look or function differently in your body you could learn how to do it with enough discipline.
The world medical community develops techniques for solving any medical problem than can possibly affect the human body.
Stock in the companies that bring said remedies to market.
All the excess carbon in the atmosphere comes to me, in the form of gigantic, gem-quality diamonds, which I will sell on E-Bay, simultaneously fixing global warming and breaking the deBeers monopoly.
Every weapon of mass destruction on the planet gets teleported down to the Earth’s mantle.
Every person with any influence in the United Nations gets an overpowering urge to make me the next Secretary General.
I don’t understand. Compare my post and the post before mine. Beckdawrek wish is a wish, this means that the twins are hypothetical. I cannot make a comment on them without you automatically considering it anyppropiate?
Well, I asked for knowledge and wisdom before that. I obviously need both. I will try to respect your norms, this is your forum, your rules. But I am having difficulties adhering to rules I frankly do not understand.
Just in case, should Beckdawrek feel hurt by my post (I hope not!), I sincerely apologise. It was not my intention to hurt or offend. It was a joke (wish 4: Wit. At least I know what I am lacking).
Beta Testing… yeah.
I wish this message board would get its sense of humor back, Five times.
You didn’t hurt my feelings.
Thank you.
The mass of the atmosphere is about 5.5e18 kg. The CO2 level before the industrial revolution was 280 ppm; now it’s 410 ppm, for an excess of 130 ppm. That is a mass of 7.15e14 kg CO2.
CO2 is only 12/44=27% carbon, so extracting just that leaves 1.95e14 kg. Diamond has a density of 3510 kg/m^3, so we can make 5.5e10 m^3 of diamond from it.
Suppose you set aside 1500 square feet in your backyard to stack the diamonds (140 m^2). They would form a tower 3.93e8 m tall. In customary units, that’s 244,000 miles. The Moon is 238,900 miles away. The tower would grow by several miles per day.
Ok, since there are 6e6 people on the planet, everyone gets 9.1666 cubic meters of diamond. DeBeers is still screwed.
Would diamonds make a good base for an artificial reef?
Whoops, that should be 6e9. So everyone would get 9.16 cubic decimeters. That’s much more manageable.
Nobody on this board needs to know those specifics, so… I’ll submit my amended wish when you prove your Genie bona fides.
Every single person on earth including all those in power become convinced that climate change is far and away the most important problem that must be focused on.
After that, species diversity and habitat restoration.
A universally used additive to public drinking water turns out to inculcate empathy and compassion. You only have to imbibe once. Before the culprit is discovered virtually everyone on earth has drunk it.
As a secondary side effect, no one enjoys really loud noises any more.
I’d also like my energy returned from wherever it went.
This board has a history of misogynistic attitudes, which people have been complaining about for years, to the point where many women have left the board as a result of it. We have been actively trying to eliminate such misogynistic posts, and one of the things that has consistently been complained about is boy’s locker room type humor.
Your twins joke was just a joke. I get that. And if you are sitting around with a bunch of guys, most would probably just laugh. But it’s the type of humor that many women here find uncomfortable.
If you want to discuss this further, feel free to start a thread in ATMB.