BUUUUUUUUURRRRRRPPPP!!!
What? I warned you.
For some reason, when I’m in school and trying to sleep, I turn my head sideways and rest it on my arm. I think it relaxes my epiglottis, because every time I wake up, I always have a stomach-full of air.
BUUUUUUUUUUUUURP!
And for both your sakes, I hope your last meals before the burps had nothing to do with onions. Ugh.
-Tezza 
WHAT THE!!! Oh my gosh!!! I… I… I think I’m going to fart!!! raises from the chair and leans towards the candle …ahhh… clear a path quick.
Talk about embarrassing. I did a very, very stinky one cheek sneak earlier. Right as I finished, I hear “Hi, Tim.”
My sister’s very attractive friend had walked in whilst I was gassing.
It was, as I said, stinky. I pretended not to notice.
–Tim
Yesterday, I had an 45-second belch (now that’s a guy thing…timing your belches) end half a second before my boss walked in. That’s what I call good timing.
I did a one cheek sneak in the middle of economics class once. I almost got away with it, until the very end, when it started making a LOT of noise.
I pretended to look surprised.
I’m big on the SBD: silent but deadly, wow. Great way to make a first impression.
Hmmmmmmmmm…I thought I heard thunder. Oh, it’s just you guys!
My nine-year-old has perfected the art of belching an ENTIRE SENTENCE. He’s growing up into a man so fast.
<sigh>