Today working at the tutoring center I felt an unwelcome sensation in my bowels. I had to fart! :eek: However, this was not something I wanted to blast out on the floor- while there was background noise of people talking and such, I couldn’t guarantee that they might hear me sneak one past. I was too busy to go to the bathroom, and many people were loitering outside. So I held it in.
Mind and matter fought against each other for the next fifteen minutes, but my degree of fart supression was inferior (some girls I know seem to be able to hold it in for a WEEK until they can let it go at an opportune moment :eek: ). I had but one repreive- the office!
The office in our center has this sliding door. When shut, the room is virtually soundproof. From where I was, I didn’t see anybody inside, so I figured I was safe. I told my supervisor, “I need to print out some worksheets” (honest statement, convenient excuse).
I dashed in the office, slammed the door shut, and emitted a noise on par with a Titan rocket being launched nearby. Wiping the sweat off my brow, I sighed in relief feeling that I had gotten away scott free. However, I heard a murmur and wheeled around to see this six year old girl with a horrified expression on her face :eek: Somehow, in my panic, I had unwittingly dashed in the room and farted at her without knowing. She pointed at me and glared like the way pod people do, when all of the sudden the phone rang.
To my great misfortune, I had found the whole thing both incredibly embarassing but also incredibly hysterical. The person on the phone was curious about job prospects, and the whole conversation my voice was wavering and I was snickering. It kind of went like this-
“Well snik we, ah, dont HAVE ANY positions available at the moment, but if you chortle turn in a job application we can keep you on file FOOOOOR the next hiring pfffttt! cycle”
It was like I was fighting back a Tourette’s outburst or something. I felt kind of bad, because the person on the other line thought I was being a total smartass…thank god it wasn’t the Reigonal manager who called or a member’s parent… :eek: