Relate Seasonal Vignettes of Poutiness right here, everyone’s invited!
Every year about this time I fall prey to a bout of seasonal overload. I can’t stand another Christmas song, I have no time left to shop, no money, didn’t get around to baking, no parties to go to…and working retail at this time of year means you’ve got to sublimate all the stress and maintain a pleasant aspect.
So last night, after going to four grocery stores searching for sun-dried tomatoes in oil, and then realizing I had left four stores without buying whipping cream, or veggies, or anything else I needed, I decided to take a drive to look at Christmas lights and cheer myself up. Then I realized I don’t have a home of my own to decorate. I am dreading Christmas Day because my son, my daughter and my mother do not get along, and are not mature enough to suck it up for four hours for my sake. My only romantic interest in the whole world apparently just wants me for a buddy. My knees are in agony, and I need a haircut. The terror alert is now Orange.
So I start crying. I pull off into the park, and look at the Cleveland skyline, and just bawl. I cry because I’m tired, and because I’m poor, and because the world isn’t running my way. And then I dry my tears, tell myself to count my blessings, and drive home.
So come to my Pity Party, and vent your holiday stress! Appetizers are on the sideboard, drinks are in the kitchen, and Phil Collins is on the stereo. Party on!
Could be worse. At least you have kids. I’ve always wanted to be a daddy.
My mom’s in Arizona, my sister and her family are in San Diego, and I’m up here in northern Washington. (Not that I’d like to live anywhere else, mind.) My best friend (from whom I bought this house, and who is still living here for a few months) is going to California to see his mom and family.
I do have an invitation from a fellow Doper to spend some time with her and her husband (they live a couple miles from me), and I appreciate it greatly; but it’s not the same as having one’s own family. (FWIW, I usually spend Christmas camped out in front of the TV.)
No romantic possibilities, no job.
I guess we just have to be thankful we’re not dead or in jail or whatever.
I, too, was feeling sorry for myself… until I read this thread and thought to myself… “It could be a LOT worse… I could live in Cleveland!” sorry… couldn’t resist.
I think we (and I certainly include myself) set unreasonable expectations for the holidays… I have been sans a romantic attachment all year… why does it depress me to be alone NOW?! because I get beat over the head with the images of “happy couples” and romantic nights by the fire… and indeed I beat myself over the head with those same images… “What kinda loser am I?” … “All my friends are married and have families” etc, etc…
so… anyway, let’s all look at the bright side, enjoy what we got and thank God above (or whoever it is you personally thank for such things) that we are not lepers in Calcutta… or living in Cleveland (sorry again, Clevelanders… it’s just too easy a target!)
Hey! Cleveland has no mudslides, earthquakes, wildfires, snipers, tropical storms, tsunamis, giant cockroaches, fire ants, kudzu, and, if you live on the correct side of town, no 16" snowfalls. Anyone who mentions the score of last night’s Browns game is on clean-up detail. Pass the shrimp, please.
Amen to the “being alone at the holidays” rants … that’s always what upsets me most. The worst part is, despite various romantic attachments over the years, it seems I’m always alone at Christmas.
And since we’re playing the “poor me” game, I’ll also add that Christmas Eve is my birthday, and for the last twenty-seven years, I’ve spent it with my mother’s family, people I only see once a year. I decided this year that I would spend my birthday the way I wanted to, but the unfortunate thing is that everyone in my life has something better to do on Christmas Eve. My parents moved to warmer climes earlier this year, and they’re not even bothering to come up for the holidays, so I don’t even get the parental pity party to keep me warm. My brother and his family decided Disney World was the place to be for the holidays, and I, the sole remaining representative of my family in New Jersey, will be spending Christmas in my living room, probably watching Die Hard.
But on the other hand, even if they have something better to do, I have a wonderful family that loves me (even from afar), a plethora of friends to keep me sane, a home, a job, and two cats that keep my feet warm. It could be worse.
Lets see, I’m still single while my estranged wife has moved in with someone else. I do not have custodial rights to my son so I have to worry about another person trying to take over my fatherly duties. I have made no friends in the close to four years I have been living here in Tampa so I will be alone for Christmas. All my family is in Cleveland so I can’t even go over anyone’s house to stave off the loneliness. My job, while not all that sucky, is dead end and going no where. I need a hug.
(((( Amp )))) and hugs to everyone else in this thread.
I am so glad I have my kids, a husband, and a family that is close to spend Christmas day with.
If anyone in Iowa is alone on Christmas, they are more than welcome to spend the day with my family.
We are in the same boat. My EW kicked me to the curb and moved in with her lesbian lover. Just in time for the holidays. Here is a hug. If I were closer, I’d pass you this bottle of scotch.
I wish I had more money, had a career even! I want to provide for my angel (got one child but she’s autistic and it’s HARD to deal with at times without going NUTS) but just as I finished school, she was diagnosed with autism and my life took a complete 180 for the worse.
I mean, I am lucky that I get to stay home with her BUT I need an income… money is the only thing you can buy food, clothing, soap and whatnot with, ya know? I have a wonderful SO but I rarely get to see him. We usually have the kids with us since my mother doesn’t get the idea of what a grandparent should be ( I know, it’s not her job to watch my child but come on! Once in a blue moon isn’t nice).
I never ask her to watch my angel because my mom is a drama queen and her life is just SO darn hectic (she makes her life that way, she’s got the “martyr syndrome” and makes her own stress… basically, she does nothing but acts like she’s the one that makes the world RUN right). So we all should personally thank my mother for the world NOT coming to an end… snicker
I hear you, though… life is rarely perfect for anyone. I just keep telling myself, “it could be worse”. My kiddo could have so much more wrong, like Cerebral Palsy, mental retardation, or be unable to walk. I could be living out of a box behind McDonald’s, begging for change. I could be hooked on drugs or in jail, you get the point? It could be worse and I try to have hope.
I’m getting on your bandwagon, we need to know that life’s dumping on all of us, not singling out you or me. If we can help each other in some way, it’s all good. Please take heart when the going gets shitty and know we’re here for you…
I don’t really do much in the way of Christmas ever, and last year I did even less, since my then-fiance was Jewish. No biggie.
The kicker? He dumped me on either the 28th or 29th of last year (I can’t remember which because I was so freaked out) because his MOTHER DIDN’T LIKE ME. They actually said we “didn’t have their blessing” and they wouldn’t attend the wedding. And instead of standing up to them, he WENT ALONG WITH IT.
Way to poison the end of December for the rest of time, you coward. I was damn near suicidal for a while.
I think I’m going to go to bed and stay there until January.
Damn, Amp, do I need to drive over to Tampa and give you a hug? I’d invite you over for Christmas, but I won’t be home…actually, I’ll be in Thonotosassa on Christmas. I’d rather be home alone…
Don’t mind me. I rarely talk about this outside of my family. After two years though I figure I can bitch in public for a bit. Had to get it out of my system. I’m good for another two years or so.
Ahhh…my mom’s husband regifted me with something his boss gave him – a bottle of wine! They don’t drink. So now I know what I’ll do on the 29th when they’re not home to laugh at me.
Can i join in? i was mentally ill from dec96-dec2000, i spent 2001 recovering then just started college in 2002. I was going to be a nurse but i flunked out a week ago due to the fact that 2 students ratted me out to the professor for a screwup i did. So now im 24 years old with no marketable skills and i have to depend on my family for money. I dont know what ill study next as i can either do a quickie 1 year degree that pays low with no prospects (mechanic, medical/dental assistant) or a 3-3.5 year one that pays better with more prospects (chemistry or microbiology). i used to never drink but ever since i flunked out ive been getting drunk pretty much daily. dont know how long itll last.
if/when i graduate, i will end up spending the holidays alone. I didnt set up any christmas decorations this year, had it not been for the fact that im visiting my family over break i would literally not know it was christmas.
On the bright side i have a good family, im intelligent (academically i really am, i am just poor at hands on shit), i have one or two good friends i can rely on, luxury isnt that important to me.
I feel you on the no SO for the holidays. I have an SO, but he’s currently deployed until August
And if that wasn’t hard enough for the holidays, I wont be spending it with my famlily for the first time ever, and I am currently waiting to find out if i have cancer or not. “most wonderful time of the year” my ass.
Meh, I’m just going to pretend it’s just another normal day off, sleep late, open up the package my SO is sending me, and try not to dwell on the negetive.
