My dad used to (and sometimes still does) call me Possum. My brother is Spot. My sister is Fleabag. Dunno why she got the insulting name, but it never seemed to bother her that much.
ETA: I just asked my sister. Apparently it does bug her. I hadn’t realised … sorry, sister.
Moderating
One of the things I like about the SDMB is that personal insults, like this one, aren’t allowed in most of the forums. Please don’t do this again.
Dude, I have no personal issues with you, and I have been receptive to what the folks in here have been saying, and I have said that I will cease the teasing. I think that you are just reading way more into this than is necessary along with conflating your own negative experiences with my situation.
In fact, I asked both my boys last night as we were brushing our teeth if they liked it when I teased them with nicknames, and they both told me “no”. So there you go. Then I got my ass pasted in MarioKart Wii by an eight year old. Justice served.
FoieGras, I really respect the way you’ve responded to the criticisms in this thread. 
I kind of figured the reason you posted in the first place was because you were surprised at your wife’s response. Spouses are great for feedback of that sort - my husband has reeled me in more than once.
The only other observation I didn’t see in this thread (though I was reading fast so perhaps I missed it) is when Jacob IS being a little shit (as small fry are wont to do - I have 6-yr-old twins myself) and really getting on your nerves, I hope you go ahead and address it in the moment. And let him know he’s irritating you.
I think parents today are under a lot of pressure to React Perfectly At All Times, Quelling Any Irritation Caused by Small Children. Instead of just being human and letting him know you’re mad.
I’ve caught myself storing up little bits of anger over thises and thatses and then drifting into passive aggressive behavior.
Thanks fessie. I have to admit to a certain level of initial surprise at the reaction of many of the members, given that the thread was meant mostly as a joke and that, like tickling, mild teasing was something my boys and I have played around at for years now, sometimes they’d laugh and have fun with it, sometimes they acted like they didn’t like it. My Dad used to tease my brother and I very similarly, and I never thought he was being mean.
But, after thinking about what people have said here I decided to put the question to the jury of the boys, and their response to my question being in the negative was really the only answer I needed.
I also think you’ve responded quite well. You took heaps from other posters, graciously and decided to act on what we shared. What’s not to respect?
It was either that or channel my inner Eric Cartman.
I think the thing is that some kids LIKE to be teased, some kids can handle being teased, and other kids just don’t like it at all. At aged 4, the world is a pretty ‘literal’ place - no room for nuance, or sarcasm, or inference.
There’s no doubt that you love your kids, FGIE, but if one of the ways in which you show that love (in the teasing) is not *perceived *that way, then it’s a bit of a pointless exercise. 4-year-olds live in a tiny world of mum, dad, siblings and *stuff - *so although on the one hand, it’s not a big deal to you (whose world is infinitely bigger) to Jacob, it’s a sizable slice of his universe.
Don’t do it to him. My grandmother’s second husband used to tease my then 6-year-old brother and me (4) mercilessly with inane name-calling so we killed him.
So is killing your grandmother’s second husband one of the 6 impossible things before breakfast, or was that done after an evening meal?
There’s a difference between better and less bad.
Foie, he was the evening meal. With fava beans and a nice chianti. I wasn’t 4 then.
I haven’t posted here in ages…but, I had to sign in and give you kudos for not blowing up at some of the remarks hurled at you.
I used humor(sarcasm) when my kids were little…didn’t go over as well when my three year old son was having a temper tantrum in the middle of a store(on the floor, pounding his hands and feet on the ground SCREAMING “BUT I WANT A TOY” at the top of his lungs) I yelled back “Well I want a Ferrari… I guess we’re both gonna be disappointed!!”
Then I did what we wish all parents would do in a public place, I picked my son up, apologized for leaving my partially filled shopping cart for someone to put back and left the store with my still screaming child.
He may not have found the humor in my comment, but it helped me diffuse a tense situation. I also used it as a learning experience…I refused to let him come with me to the store for three weeks, explaining to him that I could not take the chance that he would not do the same thing and embarrass me completely.
This was hard for him, he loved going places with me…but he learned his lesson and never had another temper tantrum in a store.
OK…maybe they are different things…after all, I am an evil mommy… http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=233196**************
I don’t think sarcasm and a little venting is the same as using using potentially belittling nicknames (creep-o, booger) when the child says they don’t like it and to please stop.
Humor is a survival mechanism for parents, we just must use it fairly.
Not to pile on, but you are not your Dad and your boys are not you and your brother.
I hated teasing as a child and it taught me cruelty. I can be very nasty verbally and it is not something I’m proud of. My parents didn’t tease, but they allowed my older sibs to do so, unchecked (mostly due to lack of supervision–there were 5 of us). Bad scene for the youngest. Not all of us have thick skins or the emotional strength to fight back, especially at age 4.
Kudos to you, though, for doing what really matters–asking your sons about it and taking your cue from them. I’ll bet they’d love some of that teasing when they get to be about 8 or so. (well, not Creep-o, never that, but something in the same vein).
That’s what I think, too. It feels good to be teased in a loving way, by people who you know love you and know you well enough to tease you about things that pertain only to you. It feels inclusive. I think it’s just a bit early for your boys.
I’m as amazed as the OP by all the vitriol in this thread; since when did teasing your kids become some form of life-scarring abuse? Giving your kid a silly nickname that’s in context with shows he watches is hardly up there will calling him “shithead” or “dumbfuck” or “stupid” or something. Geez.
Speaking for myself, the issue was that the kid was visibly upset and asked his dad to stop and the dad didn’t that was the issue.
Teasing can be a lot of fun- as long as everyone is actually having fun.
Anyone else find the dynamic interesting, whereby BigT claims that intent is what matters, WhyNot points out that it is reception that matters, and FGIE comes back to a bunch of critical posts and follows up by qualifying the situation in the original OP?
I agreed with WhyNot when I saw him/her say that reception matters, and seeing FGIE’s response to the OP only reinforces that thought. It was as if FGIE didn’t like the reception to his OP, and that reception struck him enough to further explain the situation.
And to FGIE - I think you’re trying to make excuses with your follow up, by saying you stop but then the next day you continue. I’ll point to the title of this thread, which you authored, as my evidence of how you really feel about the whole situation. Just one fellows opinion.
Granted Audrey; but when I think of being called “creep-o” and “booger” they’re certainly names that make ME feel good about myself … Identity, to a 4-year-old is really important - hence FGIE’s son stating his entire name when he’s wanting to establish that he’s* not *“creep-o” or “booger.”
I’m sure you appreciate the point, creep-o…
Actually, I do recall one thing my mother used to tease me about. She used to look at me when I’d done something “good” and say, “I believe I’ll keep you.”
Of course she was only kidding around, but to a concrete operationalist (and I was that at age 6, which is when I remember this happening), that was scary as hell. It had never occurred to me that kids could not be kept and I wondered what I would do that would make her give me away. I was much to frightened to ask her, thinking (as kids do) that if I asked, asking would make it happen…
My point is that words do matter. I like the idea of a teasing, fun, good natured ribbing relationship between parent and child. I just don’t think the OP is there quite yet. And that he should take his cue from his boys. He is doing so, so that’s that.