Sadly, no. Primarily for lack of a laminator. My dad has one, but he lives almost an hour away, and my sister was giving one to her now-husband as a wedding gift, but we didn’t at the time have ready access to one. And, really, the thought of a laminated card seemed less weird to me at the time given my family. (My dad sends us each a laminated card with family addresses and phone numbers each time someone moves or changes a number, so they’re kind of popular in my family.)
Absolutely. I do think it’s your responsibility, both as a matron of honor and her sister to call her on her bullshit. I can think of a couple things that I had to talk to my sister about when she was going a bit nutsy. I think you can take two approaches: the bite-your-tongue, swig-your-alcohol and endure approach (which is what my BIL did, and what I opted to do about 80% of the time), or what I considered the come to Jesus approach.
Anyway, just keep in mind that in a few months this will all be over, and if you’re lucky, she’ll go back to being the sister you know and love.
Dio, I’ve spent a fair amount of time at various wedding related message boards, and this is ABSOLUTELY the truth! The more elaborate the wedding, the deeper the depression afterwards. It’s kinda scary, really.
I’d also be sick of your sister’s wedding if I had to put up with that much conversation about it. This is kind of why I worry about my own little wedding wackiness. I’m not yet in the planning phase, but I’m trying to get ideas of what I think I might like that would be reasonably within my ideal budget (between $5000 and $1000 at the most). I realize that, if I look at stuff on occasion, think about it, and make a final judgment on it, I’ll get rid of most of the really stupid ideas before I have a chance to even think about pricing them out. I am, however, really afraid of becoming a bit bridezilla-ish on some issues because there are some areas where I am adamant about bucking tradition. (I don’t want to wear a veil, and I don’t want to get married in a church. For the most part, everything else can be compromised on.) I just am really afraid at times that I’m going to be seen as a bridezilla for wanting the wedding between my fiance and I to reflect our personalities and not necessarily be just like the ones that are faked for television.
Hopefully your sister will calm down eventually. I can’t imagine my SIL having pulled any of that crap when she married my brother, as she’s fairly relaxed on these things. She was, however, really, really giddy the entire day… and has been ever since.
The duties of the bridesmaids are to not fart audibly during the cremony and not sleep with the groom at all. The maid of honor has one additional duty: if the bride farts audibly during the ceremony, the maid of honor must pretend to be the culprit. Any other duties that any of the maids or matrons should take upon themselves are purely voluntary (though it may not feel that way).
As I’ve heard it put before, don’t forget that you’re getting “married”, not “weddinged.”
Thank the FSM I found a woman who felt like I did: we both wanted our wedding to be fun for us, and we’d seen friends and relatives have these huge shindigs and get all stressed out about every detail and by the time the day rolls around, they’re exhausted and miserable and freaking out and can’t enjoy it.
So, we went to Vegas, got married in a cute little chapel, had a reception for everyone at a local restaurant where we had a little cake delivered, and that was pretty much it. Totally stress-free (well, except for my wife’s hair, but I don’t know if it’s possible to have a wedding without bride’s hair stress). And, even though far more people showed up than we’d initially planned (we thought there’d be maybe 20 people interested in coming, but about 50 turned out), we had a ball.
The S-I-L is pulling a similar stunt now and we’re growing tired of it too. Incredibly sweet girl but the most expensive goddamn kid ever, even as an adult her parents still have to pay for everything. Broke first engagement, divorced from first marriage, now engaged to someone 10 years younger so this’ll be the 3rd dress and 2nd wedding her dad’s paying for, a huge one at a luxury hotel… and she’s 36. Damn, just go elope, would ya?
I don’t really understand people making big fusses for second or third etc. marriages, lieu. Once was plenty for me, and I didn’t make a big fuss about THAT one. I think it would be a lot easier rejecting the bridal kerfuffle on the second or third wedding - I simply wouldn’t participate in it. “Yeah, that’s nice - go tell someone who cares.”
You think you’re sick of it? Maid of honor isn’t even in the top five of people being dragged around on the bride’s train. Just learn your lesson, and when it’s your turn elope.
I guess Daddy never learned to say “No” to his baby?? :rolleyes: Yeah, at 36, she’s quite adult enough to throw her own shindig herself.
My daughter is planning to get married right after she graduates in May of '08. We suggested she elope, but she and her intended want a wedding. They have said they’ll be married by Fred - a friend who’s a notary. She does want a wedding dress, but she asked me to make it for her. That’s all she’s asked of us, and she’s just 21. I’m willing to bet that if we offered her a chunk of change, she’d save it toward the downpayment on a house.
Congrats to ThePerfectChild!!! That’d be smart. My in-laws are postponing the building of their dreamhouse because of this. I know it’s troubling my M-I-L greatly. Like I said, she’s a good kid but some get started and don’t know where, or how, to stop.
The expense, the time spent, the solitary focus often required or at least expected by everyone involved. Whew.
I remember my one brother’s wedding so fondly. He’s twelve years younger than I. I didn’t miss not being invited to the bacheler bar hopping really. The wedding had a couple extra people beyond normal for the men and women. The thing was I got asked to be an usher. I turned it down flat. I said I wasn’t seating people at the wedding, and I especialy wasn’t renting the expensive tux cane and top hat that they had to wear. I was told we knew you or your brother would feel hurt, when we picked the bestman. I really didn’t want that slot either, but why in the hell would I want to usher people. That’s like the hired help but you don’t get paid, and I can’t enjoy the wedding. I sat next to my brother’s girl friend who’s hot amd wore something nice, comfortable, and not humiliating. The wedding party was almost solid with her relatives, that came in for the day from distant locals. I didn’t have to sit at the head table, so the night was a big fun party.
Let the shit slide, and enjoy it, reguardless of how uptight she gets. Remember where your line is and don’t cross it.
I was taught that my wedding day was for my guests and my friends and my relatives to share in my committment. We did things (within budget) to keep our guests happy. We did things that made my mother and father happy (for my first wedding, they did pay for it, so they did get a say). We made compromises - I’d have preferred a smaller first weddiing - my Dad wanted all his friends there, I had a bigger wedding. When I got married a second time (on my dime), we provided a party for our friends. We were grateful for all the help we got from people (friends who helped decorate, friends who did our flowers).
Somehow, somewhere, a few women have turned “wedding” into “pagent.” And if they hurt their best friend’s feeling choosing bridesmaids who are slimmer and have better hair, they don’t care “Its my day.” And it turned into some strange disease where we think our wedding needs to be elegant enough to grace the cover of People Magazine - budget and friendships be damned.
I’ve been to plenty of weddings, and I can’t remember what anyone’s bouquet looked like but my own. The only flowers I remember were because they were too tall for the table and we had to talk around them (I remember a couple who did the individual cake as centerpeice thing). I don’t remember who wore what dress (though I have a mental image of two similar looking brides in similar strapless gowns, and one woman in pale pink, I do remember that vividly, she wasn’t a slim woman, and it wasn’t a sleek dress - and she looked something more like the Energizer Bunny than a bride). I don’t remember who played what music (except the couple whose recessional was “When I’m 64”).
In case you haven’t been reading, Featherlou is also the bride’s sister. She’s getting anything and everything that the rest of the immediate family is getting, plus all the crap that the maid of honor gets.
The only flowers I remember are from a wedding I didn’t even attend - but it’s one of my grandmother’s favorite stories. The bride attended a garden party where the centerpieces were flowers in big round vases with goldfish swimming around the stems. She thought it was a great idea, and wanted to do it for her own wedding. The problem was that her wedding was outdoors in July. When people got to the reception, all the centerpieces had upside-down goldfish floating at the top.
I think the MOH got the job of extracting all the dead fish before the bride could arrive and see them. I hope that doesn’t happen to you, featherlou.
I’m getting married in January of next year. I bought my dress at Lane Bryant, on sale. We booked the cheapest place we could find, which happens to be lovely, but that’s beside the point. My maid of honor calls me about once a week to see if I’m still alive and ask if I’ve done anything. It really isn’t that hard. Just make a decision and stick with it. And I’m only 21. My parent’s said they’d help pay for it, but the total budget will be under 5K. I think some brides just need a bucket of cold water dumped on them.
Extract the dead fish? I think that would be hysterically funny. I suppose you could extract them after the bride has seen them and started shrieking. It wouldn’t be nearly as funny if you extracted them before she saw them. This may be one of the reasons you don’t want your sisters in your bridal party.
