One of the reasons why my wife won’t go down on me is that she grosses out over the thought of millions of sperm swimming around in her mouth. Since the thought revolts her, I don’t push the issue.
But I also know women who really like to give oral sex, and they seem to suffer no ill effects. So that got me to thinking about the immunological implications of oral sex, excluding the whole issue of STDs.
In the case of oral sex on a woman (which I love to do), you get a mouth full of the microbial critters she’s got running around in her vagina, plus a little urine, and sometime I think I can taste a little blood. Can you catch a yeast infection from her? I assume the antibodies in your mouth are up to the task, since I’ve never gotten sick yet, but are there conditions when you shouldn’t perform oral sex on her? When you transfer the critters from your mouth into her vagina, does it help knock down the yeast count? When you get a mouth full of her yeast, does it help slow down tooth decay?
Likewise, in the case of oral sex on a man, I assume you get the critters he’s growing in his urinary tract, a little urine, and a few million sperm. If the man has jock itch, does the oral pleasurer get some kind of crud? Under what conditions should they not perform oral sex on a man? Again, does your mouth bateria help knock down his urinary tract critters, and do those sperm help prevent tooth decay?
And it’s not just the mouth, but it’s also the back of the sinuses that are involved as well. If she swallows, and Mr. Spermy goes up the back of her sinuses, is that a big deal?
Finally, is there any truth to the urban legend where a college biology student, as part of a group mouth-swabbing-and-looking-under-the-microscope exercise, was able to see living sperm in her mouth, days after she had done the deed?
