live with the parent he wants to live with? My ex and I share custody and I was wondering when he can legally tell a Judge that he wants to come live with me and the Judge has to accept his decision?
Your question may be unintenionally poorly phrased; I can tell you that no judge anywhere “has to accept (the child’s) decision” as long as that child is under the age of 18. At a “reasonable age” (in Maryland it appears to be 12) the judge can ask a child’s preference, and may even take that preference into account, but there is no law (that I can find) stating that a judge must ask the child what they want. “Child’s best interest” can be easily decided without the child’s input; whether that is “right/fair” or not is another topic for discussion.
If you have joint legal and physical custody, and you have a working relationship with your ex, there is no reason why you can’t work out a deal without involving the courts at all. Typically the courts have no interest in divving up time spent at each parent’s house- when they say “joint physical custody” it doesn’t always mean that the child does the 50/50 shuffle. As long as there is frequent contact with the non-custodial parent and you are following the “rules” of joint legal custody, the courts are happy.
If you are going for sole physical custody, you will likely run up against the case of Boswell v. Boswell (this happened to a friend of mine). From here, a brief description:
Previously the courts favored mom; Boswell turned that on its head, and the courts are now very, very hesitant to award sole custody unless there’s a compelling reason otherwise.
I’d advise you (IANAL) to try to work something out with the ex, especially if the child is over the age of 13-14, and not involve the courts at all. Make sure any change in physical custody is excruciatingly detailed in writing, signed and notaraized.
Cool, thanks. My ex absolutely will not do anything out of court, which is why I ask. See, I’ve always heard that at age 10 a child can let a Judge know who he wants to live with and the Judge usually takes that into consideration when making the decision. Anyways, thanks !